


When The Rain Comes Down

by tyomawrites



Series: Rain & Ragnarok [1]
Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: Everybody Lives, Except people that I don't like essentially, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Nudity, The usual Vikings related tags, Vikings needed to be a lot more gayer, Violence, show typical violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-10-09 10:39:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 18
Words: 78,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17405399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tyomawrites/pseuds/tyomawrites
Summary: Your name was Bragi Lothbrok, the entirety of your life was and has always been sworn to your family, to your father, and your brother Björn. You followed your father to England, you were going to follow your father to Paris. Enter Halfdan the Black, and you think maybe despite the turnout of strangers in Kattegat, he might not be so bad.





	1. Chapter 1

Life wasn’t as easy as it used to be for you and your family, You were the youngest child. Your older brother Björn seemed to have a knack for being in the spotlight, and your older sister Gyda was as quiet and timid as a mouse even with your mother teaching her. You loved your father and your mother, they always treated you well. When your brother Björn was twelve he left with your father, to see Earl Haraldson. You were too young to go, him being a year your senior and your mother's insistence that you would stay behind.

You were a Ragnarsson, your mother had always warned you to be careful of your title. You knew your father’s rise to power and to fame was unintentional, accidental, and that the burden upon your mother was heavier than you knew, when your father lied to her and broke her heart. It broke your heart when she left with Björn.

When you decided to stay with your father, many people mistook you for your older brother Björn, thinking that he was all grown up now. You disappointed them most times, when you snapped at them that Björn wasn’t here and it was because of your father he and your mother had left. Other people had heard about your mother and tried to comfort you, but you snapped at them too. You were such an angry child, missing your older brother something fierce. Your father however boasted your name and your heritage in glory, proud to call you his son, alongside your two younger half-brothers. You weren’t timid or scared by any means, the blood of the gods ran through you veins, but you weren’t as volatile or as eager for a fight, you preferred drinks  over fights, still missing your older brother with all the resentment a teenager could offer his father.

You and your family went to Upsala, before your father drove Björn and your mother away, you became good friends with King Horik’s son Ari, smiling at at him. He was a sweet boy, his eyes were kind and so were his words as he spoke to you. You met him again when King Horik visited your family in Kattegat and your father held a feast to celebrate. After the great celebration that your father held, you found yourself walking through the dark streets of Kattegat with him in tow, laughing and giggling at his every word. He gave you a bushy eyed smile, which made yours stretch from ear to ear before he had pulled you into an embrace and thanking you for being his friend. 

The night before your trip to your fathers were to leave for Northumbria, you found yourself sitting on the beach in the moonlight, tossing stones across the water as best as you could.

“Do you think we’ll fight the Saxons again Ari?” You asked him, eyes staring out over the horizon. 

“I don’t think so, they were scared of us last time.” He patted your knee, before turning his head to look at you.

“It’s good that we have an alliance, I’m glad we are friends.” You commented, meeting his eyes. In a flash he pressed his mouth to yours, only for a quick second before looking down at you with his bright eyes. You looked at him wide eyed, before pushing back, hands coming to clutch at his face in a clumsy attempt at a kiss. You tried to do it like how you father saw, something foreign and strange to you.   
  
Ari pulled away, giggling at you. “Like this Bragi, stay still.” He murmured to you, slowking leaning in this time to press his lips against yours, tentative, he then moved his lips, slowly, taking your bottom lip and nipping it, a smile crawling on his face as you gasped. His hands cradled your face as he began to push his lips against you. You fumbled with your hands, before dropping them to his waist when he pulled away panting.

“There.” He said to you, before you were interrupted by the sound of someone calling out Ari’s name. 

“I have to go.” He muttered to you, his hand still on your cheek. “I will see you tomorrow.” He scrambled to his feet, his grin wide as he stared down at you. 

It hurt you when in Northumbria, Ari was the first to die, with an arrow through his chest.

 

* * *

 

 

He came to rescue you, your brother. He must have urged your mother to find men and come save you and the people of Kattegat that were left behind, after hearing news of Jarl Borg taking Kattegat. Seeing Björn again was something that you'd never actually thought you would do until he and your mother came to your rescue. 

“Ha! I do not need to ask if you’ve been fed well you have grown so tall. When this is over we shall have many stories to tell.”

“It seems that me and your mother produced a son both strong and wise.” 

Your eyes wide as you saw your mother, and the young man in front of your father. He didn't recognize you at first, maybe because of the way you had your hair, short and half your head shaved, until your mother grabbed his shoulder and pointed you out to him, eyes full of hope, whispering into his ear. He walked over to you slowly, almost too slowly as you kept your eyes on him. He stopped in front of you, standing two, three inches taller than you, his eyes bright.

“Bragi is that you?” He sounded so calm and soft, nothing like your brother that you remembered as a child. “I don’t remember what you used to look like.”

You smiled up at him, flicking your fringe out of your face, a mirror image of blue eyes staring back at you. “As if you could ever forget me Björn. Am I not your favourite brother?” You teased him.

“Bragi!” He pulled you into into a hug, squeezing you in his arms. 

“Who gave you permission to get taller than me? Huh? And better looking?” You clapped him on the back. 

“I'm your big brother!” He pulled away to look at you, cupping your cheek. “Of course I'm allowed to be bigger than you and better looking.” You shook your head at him, eyes slightly wet. 

“I wish I went with you and mother.” You blurted out. “I didn’t want you to go.” Your bottom lip quivered as he looked down at you. “I resented father for driving you both away.”

“ _ Bragi. _ Sweet Bragi. He pulled you close, into a hug. “You’re safer with father, rather than us.”

“But you can protect me Björn, you always have. I don’t want you to leave again.” You swallowed the lump in your throat, you felt stupid for wanting to cry, even though Björn was standing right in front of you.  “Not after you are done here. Take me with you, please?”

“No my sons and I will go.” Your father’s voice broke the two of you out of your moment together. “We will only need a few men.”


	2. Chapter 2

You followed Björn and your father as you snuck into Kattegat. “Cause a distraction, my sons and I will do the rest.” You followed Björn  and your father towards the winter storehouse, slinking in the dark shadows with your axe in your hand. Björn slit the throat of a guard, before running to the gates and opening them and slipping inside, pulling straws down from the roofs of the storehouses. 

Your father lit the fire with his axe and a piece of flint and you and your brother threw the burning straws into the storehouses. You and your brother grabbed Olrik, carrying him with you as you fled the area.

The next morning you waited in the woods with your family, next to Björn as you waited for Jarl Borg to find Olrik’s dead body, you hefted your shield up, pushing against Jarl Borg’s men, shoving through and pushing back their shield wall as you swung your axe over their shields.

As Björn was bowled over by one of Jarl Borgs men, you shouted, tackling him and slamming your axe into his body, checking him out of the way with it. You threw your axe at another man who tried to run towards Björn, running forward to rip it out of his bloody chest before feeling a sword that was meant for your brother slash at your side. You clutched at the slash, your face and your bare hands slick with blood. You limped over to your brother as Jarl Borg retreated. He clutched onto you as you swayed, eyes smiling.

“Better me than you.” You laughed to him as your mother rushed to your side.

“Oh Bragi.” Your mother cooed down at you, pressing her hand firmly to your wound. Björn picked you up as if you were a bride, an arm under your knees and another wrapped around your shoulder. Your brother and mother were greeted with open arms as they followed your brother into Kattegat.

As Björn laid you down to rest in the great hall on your bed, sitting at the end of you bed, watching your half-brothers running around.

 

* * *

 

 

You limped to your father’s throne as your mother began talking. “I’ve come to a decision, I’m aware that my son Björn wants more than anything in the world to stay with his father, and with his younger brother Bragi. I give my permission for my eldest son to stay here with his father, his brother and his half-brothers.” Your mother spoke to the people of Kattegat with tears in her eyes.

“Look after him Ragnar. Bragi, be safe?” You limped out after your mother, watching Björn help her onto her horse, for her to leave, taking her warriors with her.

You were left to your own devices for a few days, almost a week on your own, in a small cabin that your parents prepared for you away from the bustle and excitement, until you were well enough to walk (read: limp and hobble) to the great hall when King Horik arrived with bad news, of what happened to you and your father’s men in your camp. You sat next to Björn, grinning at him when he caught the eyes of the servant girl that spilled water on him.

“You like her Björn?” You teased him, nudging your shoulder against his. The action made you wince but you hid it behind a smile as Björn’s cheeks went red. Your brother clapped a hand on your back, causing you to grunt. You reached for your cup, downing the ale and coughing slightly. 

“She’s… not so bad.” Your brother admitted. “What about you Bragi? You have a girlfriend now? Looking like that?” He tugged at your fringe, laughing at you. You shook your head, eyes dropping.

“I don’t like anyone.” You muttered, shuffling your feet. You pushed your chair back, nodding to your father and King Horik. “Sorry, I feel too ill for the rest of my dinner.” You excused yourself from the table, hobbling out and away from the great hall, your stomach churning. You kept your hand on your side as you made your way to the beach, eyes trained on the horizon and the sun low in the sky. You felt your stomach rumble and the sound of a gurgle festered in your throat before you doubled over, vomiting onto the ground in front of you. 

“Bragi!” Your brother’s voice came from behind you. He must have followed you out of the Great Hall. You dropped to your knees, spitting and holding back another round of vomit from spilling onto the sand. “Are you alright?” Björn was on his knees next to you, hands hovering over your chest, the bandage on your side. You tried to push yourself onto your feet, stopping when you felt another wave of nausea and you vomited again onto the sand, your eyes watered at the acidity of your vomit in your throat and mouth. You coughed and spat, hands digging into the sand, head bowed. 

Once again Björn was carrying you back to the great hall, scolding you for over exerting yourself, you tried to stop him, waving him off and even shoving him, but you couldn’t physically stop him from picking you up and bracing you against his chest. Your father stood when he saw Björn carrying you, concerned.

“What did you do Bragi? Björn what did he do?"

“I don’t know, he just started vomiting on the sand.” Björn looked down at you, eyes wide in concern.

“Björn, put him down, go get Floki!” Your father ordered, eyes trained on you, laying where Björn had set you down, coughing and clutching at your side. 

“I’m fine!” You protested with a cough, trying to sit yourself up with one hand. You felt embarrassed that you were being so weak in front of your father and his guests.

Floki had arrived in the great hall, searching for you, gasping when his eyes met yours.

“Oh, sweet child what happened to you?” Floki knelt next to you, eyes and hands hovering over your bandages. 

“I’m fine Floki, everyone is treating me like a cripple!” You sat up with Floki’s help, his hands surprisingly gentle on you. You shook your head when Floki tried to unwrap your bandages. “I’m fine Floki!” You insisted. He took them off anyway, grimacing at the ugly, red festering skin around the wound, it looked like someone had tried to burn your already healing wound with a hot blade. You turned your face away when your father, and Björn, who’d suddenly reappeared, growled in surprise. 

“Someone… did this to you.” Floki announced, fingers touching your wound. “Who was it Bragi?” You shook your head, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“No one.” You insisted, squeezing your eyes shut and refusing to meet anyone’s eyes. You could hear the others moving around you, your father whispering to someone you could not hear, and Floki muttering to himself some gibberish that you knew had something to do with the gods. Floki rewrapped your bandages, placing a hand on your cheek.

“Rest.” He murmured to you. “The gods will see you through this” He helped you stand up, leading you over to a chair. “You will get better soon hmm? I will make sure of it.” 

You couldn’t help but frown at Floki’s words, already feeling a sense of dread engulf you, your minimal reputation as your father’s son was already damaged.

The days in preparation for your father’s return to Wessex were hard, even harder as you were still healing and no one seemed to trust you to be able to hold your own in a fight, even Björn was hesitating to fight you even as you were trying to gain back your strength. You were fed up with their stupidity, frustratingly venting to Floki and Helga who seemed to be the only ones who’d even bothered to treat you like an adult, and not a baby. 

You’d asked Björn to spar with you a second time, when you were less angry, after spending some time talking to Floki. You’d prepared yourself, standing barefoot, bandages still wrapped around your side but only to prevent sand and gravel interfering with the last bit of healing scar tissue. You picked a shield and an axe, circling your brother as he moved gingerly. You had to make the first move, Björn  refusing to strike at you, you swung at him, anger fueling you. He jumped back in surprise, eyes wide. You slammed your axe against your shield, glaring at him. “Fight me Björn.” You said firmly, pacing around him again. You lunged, missing as he dodged out the way and slammed his shield against your axe. You stepped to the side, still quick on your feet despite being out of practice, you put your weight behind your shield and slammed it into his chest, catching him off guard. Before swinging your axe just past his throat.

“Fight me Björn!” You raised your voice at him, slamming your axe again into your shield. He frowned at you, how angry your voice sound, as he stepped back and raised his shield. You gripped your axe tighter, rushing at him, slamming it and hacking at his shield until it began to splinter beneath his hands, the entire time he didn’t raise his axe to you at all, only grunting beneath the weight of your strikes against his shield. 

Your uncle Rollo had to pull you away from him, arms hooked under your armpits and crossed over his chest as he dragged you kicking and screaming from your brother. 

“Bragi! Bragi calm down!” He said into your ear, holding you tight.

“No!” You pulled away from his grip, throwing your axe down at his feet. “No, I will not calm down! I’m sick of you all treating me like I’m useless. You treat me like I can’t walk, you treat me like I can’t fight, when me fighting was the reason Björn didn’t take the sword that I took for him.” You spat at the ground. “No one wants to teach me! No one wants to spar with me! You think I’m so useless maybe Floki shouldn’t have bothered in saving me! My own brother won’t even treat me like a human.” You tossed your shield onto the ground and turned away from all of them. ”Screw all of you.” You growled at them, walking away.

You spent most of your time on the beach on your own, practicing with your axe on your shield with no one but the gods, blurry like figures that mirrored the images of warriors trying to cut you down, until your mother had arrived, ignoring your brother’s every attempt to talk to you, ignoring everything he tried to tell you.

It was your mother and Floki who had finally stood up for you in the end, when she arrived in Kattegat you told her of what Björn did, or the lack of what he did, and the lack of people supporting you when you needed it. Her eyes teared up and she cupped your cheek, holding you close to her as she pulled you into an embrace. Your mother felt outraged at the behaviour from Björn and your father, not teaching you, not letting you fight. However despite your support from her, you were still forced to ride with your brother and your family, but you stayed well away from them, in your own thoughts and your own head. It upset you that Björn couldn’t treat you like a warrior when you were injured, but you wouldn’t have done the same for him if he had taken the sword instead of you.

When you arrived in Wessex you’d helped your warriors set up camp, sheltering from the rain, pressing a hand to your side as you felt phantom aches in your side. You stayed close to your mother, listening to your parents and King Horik argue with each other. You tried to your best to stay dry until one of your scouts returned, yelling about the Saxon’s approach. You grabbed your shield, advancing with your family as the others formed a shield wall. King Ecbert’s son, Aethelwulf walked forwards to you all after placing his sword in the grass, pushing past your shield wall to stand in front of King Horik, your father and mother. You stood next to Floki, him separating you from Björn.

When your father agreed to meet King Ecbert on his terms, you raised an eyebrow but didn’t question him, instead, back up and turning around as the convoy of Saxons left your camp.

Björn tried to corner you once you walked back into camp, grabbing your hand and looking down at you. “Bragi please, let me speak.” He pleaded with you as you glared at him.

“What do you want Björn, haven’t you had enough of treating me like a lesser man.” You spat at him. 

“That wasn’t what I was doing Bragi! I was just trying to-”

“To what? Take care of me? To treat me like a useless cripple?” You yanked your arm away from him. 

‘I was trying to keep you safe!” He grabbed your hand again. “Bragi you are, my favourite brother, we are practically twins. I never want to hurt you!”

“You made me feel useless, Björn.” You admitted. “I didn’t want to to keep on living with everyone, and you, treating me like some dead weight, I felt like I had died and that there was no promise for me to enter Valhalla, that’s how you made me feel.”

“I’m sorry little brother,” He cupped your cheek, eyes soft. “Can you forgive me?”

“It would take some time.” You admitted. “You hurt me Björn. It all hurt me. Why couldn’t you have just treated me like what I am? I’m Viking.”

* * *

 

 

You braced next to Björn in the shield wall, hacking with your axe through the gaps, being knocked to the side as the Saxons managed to punch through three of the walls you’d already made. You gripped your axe tighter in your hand, hefting it to a better grip and ducking for your shield before slamming it into Saxon after Saxon. Body checking them out of the way and hacking at the ones that you could reach. You couldn’t tell whether or not you had the advantage in numbers as you glanced around through the chaos, trying to count all of your men versus the Saxons. 

You pummelled the edge of your shield into the face of one of them as your father yelled at everyone to run, the Saxon reinforcements beginning to overwhelm you. You covered Björn’s back as he tried to get to your father, tossing your shield over your back in case of any arrows that were to be sent your way, your hand pressed to Björn’s back.

Björn threw a tantrum as you walked back through camp today, you shook your head as your brother argued with your father, before he dubbed him, ‘Björn Ironside’. You saw the face your brother made when he spotted you, guilt plainly written all over him. You nodded at him, before dropping your eyes, hand hovering over your healed wound, feeling the non existent ache.

The next morning you approached Björn, accepting his apology with a few short words. He’d gripped the side of your arm, smiling down at you before pulling you into an embrace, pressing a kiss to the shaved side of your head.   


The inside of Ecbert’s villas and courtyard was full of guards, and when you were brought before the king himself he’d asked you and your family and the others to sit at a large table next to him. The negotiations were simple, easy and straightforward and made the most sense.

Athelstan returned with Rollo and the agreed treasure almost a few hours later. You were going to put yourself forwards as a mercenary for Queen Kwentrith but your brother dragged you back and kept you still, shaking his head at you as he wrapped an arm around your chest. 

Your father did what any good man would do while honouring a treaty. You went home. Björn’s girlfriend, you’d taken to calling her that, greeted your brother when you had entered the great hall. You smiled when he looked at her in awe. It was good to see your brother happy.

The next morning you greeted Helga at the docks with her daughter in her hands, cooing down at the baby as you led her to where Floki was sleeping on the ground in the markets. You smiled when Floki saw her, and then the bundle in her arms. You took your leave 

You greeted King Horik’s family when they arrived, missing Ari’s presence, and you played with some of his young daughters while their father made a speech, smiling down at them and braiding their hair to keep them busy and safe during the feast. The girls were sweet children, you had them on either knee, making them laugh and smile with magic tricks and stories about the gods. Soon after the children had been taken to bed, and then the celebrations grew louder, you found yourself drinking with a horn of mead, smiling at everyone celebrating.


	3. Chapter 3

You were a year older now, and with the cold winter you found your laden in furs and your rubbed your nose against the cold, spending time with your father and your little brothers as your father chased them around. You grabbed Sigurd from your father’s attention, lifting him up and swinging him around and smiling at him. “You’re a good boy aren’t you Sigurd!” You cheered at him, smiling. He looked so precious and sweet. You smiled when your step-mother brought Ivar out to join you. You walked over to him carrying Sigurd, smiling down at your baby brother. “And you’re looking well Ivar.” You cooed at him with a soft smile. “He’s been getting better?” You asked. “He looks better.”

“He is as he is.” Your step-mother looked at you. “He’s precious nonetheless.”

That evening you sat around the fire with Björn listening to Torstien wax about his women troubles and the possibility of two children. You shuffled closer to the fire revelling in its warmth.

The next morning on the boats you stood with Björn as you set sail to Wessex once again. Your arrival in Wessex was uneventful, as you rode in to meet King Ecbert with your family, and Queen Kwentrith, the Queen of Mercia that you left a few warriors behind to protect. You sat next to your brother as your father and Ecbert spoke. You could only pick up a few words, hearing your father talk. Your uncle, turned to you and your father. You nodded when Björn agreed, and your mother agreed to stay and farm. Torstien across from you gave you a nod, approving your decision.

You and your brother hugged you mother the next morning, wishing her well as she looked at the both of you proudly.

“You both look after each other.” She said to you, cupping the backs of both your heads. You rode behind your father and uncle, following Queen Kwentrith to your boats. You stood with your father as she kept glancing back at the both of you curious. She seemed interesting.

Torstien watched her as you set camp, smiling when he promised to marry her.  Floki and Rollo laughed at him, teasing him.

“What about you Bragi? You like her?” Torstein nudged your shoulder. You watched the Queen dancing, smiling at her.

 

* * *

 

You stood with your father and brother, eyes wide. You were instructed back to the boats, to row further up river, only to be set upon by arrows. You frowned when you saw the forces of your enemies across on the riverbank. You lifted your shield as you approached them, ducking away from the arrows. You jumped from the boat with your father into the water, wading through with your axe and shield in hand. You slashed at the soldiers, shoving your shield against them and slamming your axe into them, laughing as you were beginning to massacre the forces of their men. You grabbed Torstiens arm as Floki slit the soldier’s throat above him. You pulled him to his feet, clapping your hand on his back as he gave you a grin. 

Back at camp you sat at Torstiens side, as he clutched his arm in pain. When your father and uncle approached him, you sat up a little straighter, hands gently dropping from his elbow. Your father pulled you to his side, whispering into your ear.

“If you don’t stop looking at him like that people will think things.” He said to you, squeezing your shoulders, before nodding at Thorstein and walking away. Your uncle sat with you and Torstein for a short while, as you worried and fussed over his arm. 

“Bragi,, Bragi.” Torstien smiled down at you. “I appreciate the help but I don’t think you can do anything.” He patted the top of your head.  The Queen came over and sat with you, she looked like she was drunk off her arse. You smiled at her when she slapped your uncle across the face. She sneered at him, but gave you a small smile when you laughed, patting your head just like Torstein did.

“Good boy.” She commented before stumbling away.

Torstien laughed at you half-heartedly, teasing you. You smiled at him, leaning your head against his leg when the Queen left. He used his injured arm to pat at your hair, braided back. 

“I'll never get used to how people like that can flock to you so easily Bragi.” 

“It's because he doesn't try to scare them away with his cock out of his pants the moment they show interest Torstein.” Your uncle teased him before you heard your father call his name.

Your father interrupted the both of you to sail across river, you laughed as you watched their army run away in fear, cheering quietly to yourself, although your mood sombered when you looked at how pale Torstein looked. You sat on the beach as the sun rose, watching him wade into the water. He swam around for a few moments, dunking his head into the water, eyes looking towards the horizon before he turned around and sat next to you, dripping wet, shaking his head slightly so that the droplets of water flicked across your face.

“You have that look again on you Bragi.” He said to you, blinking the water out of his eyes and rubbing them. “You keep looking at me like that.”

“I don’t want you to die. You’ve been a good friend to my father.” You forced a smile, blinking away the semblance of tears. 

“I don’t fear death Bragi, the gods wait for me to sup with them in Valhalla.”

It pained you to wait with Torstien when everyone else was laughing and smiling with each other, before he asked them to cut off his arm, asked Floki to cut off his arm. You held his right wrist as he lay on a plank, the axes being put to flame. You whimpered, unable to look away as Floki pressed the sizzling metal to his skin and Torstein began to scream, as Floki began to hammer the axe. Your breath stuttered as Torstein clenched his eyes shut, going deathly pale.

You picked Torstein up from where he lay in the sand. You wrapped his good arm around your shoulder as the others prepared for your advance towards where the prince said that the Queen’s brother hid. You did not like the way your father looked at Torstien, but you could not argue with what he told you, no matter how merciful you felt, and how angry you were with the gods for taking another kind friend.

Your father let Torstein approach the enemy before the rest of your men, refusing to let you follow him. You watched as Torstein stepped over the ridge and then, out of your sight.

You sat on your own after the battle. Your father injured, your brother occupied with Þorrun and your uncle off with the god knew how many women, you didn't care. It occurred to you that maybe you were clinging to Torstein too much, and the words that your father said to you before echoed in your head, making you nervous. You didn’t know how it was that you were looking at hi but if your father had something to say about it then it wasn’t good.

You found yourself in the company of a drunk Queen Kwentrith, she looked angry as she blathered on about something that you could mostly understand, you’d been picking up more and more words with your exposure to the Saxon’s and you could form a sentences and communicate with them. She turned to you, eyes observing you.

“Are you like your father?” She asked slowly, as if she was making sure you could understand her. 

“I’m Viking.” Your voice still sounded weird to you as you spoke in her language. “I am my fathers son.”

“Well then, Bragi?” She paused as if to check she was saying your name right. You nodded slightly. “Bragi Lothbrok. Have you been with a woman before?” You shook your head meeting her eyes. “Have you been with a man?” 

You ducked your head. “No? But you’ve thought about it?” She chuckled, her voice sounded like bells tinkling in the wind. Your cheeks blushed red. “Oh don’t be so shy boy, everyone should enjoy the wonders of men, and I can see why you would.” She looked around at the few of your fathers men that were still awake that night.

You laughed with her, leaning your head against her shoulder. 

The next morning your fathers men teased you, some of them having heard Kwentriths’ noises that night. You ducked your head from their laughter, despite what they thought, you didn’t sleep with the Queen that night, she’d shown you how to please her body but didn't invite you to touch, only watch.

Your brother looked at you with narrowed eyes, made his way to you after the cheers had ebbed away and died down.

“You were with the Queen last night? Hmm?” You took a deep breath and sighed. 

“It wasn’t anything Björn.” 

“Are you sure?” He looked down at you.

“Björn I didn’t, do anything with her at all last night.” You grabbed his arm. “She pleased herself in my company, that is all that happened.”

“You didn't sleep with her?” 

“No!” You shook your head almost violently.  “I wasn't interested in her, but it was a lonely night I didn't turn away her company.”

You set off to return to your camp at the order of your father. It was disheartening to see Björn so upset over þorrun, she was a breath of fresh air to your brother, even if she took up most of his time and attentions. You helped Björn take care of her on the boats before you arrived back to King Ecberts villa. You and Björn greeted your mother, kissing her cheek. She looked guilty when she heard that þorrun was injured, consoling your brother.

You enjoyed as much as you could of the festivities with your mother, sipping your drink, watching the people come and go, talk with one another, laugh and cheer and smile with each other. A few of the younger ladies tried approaching you, but you shrugged them off, Prince Aethelwulf introduced you to his wife, Judith, a sweet woman who you found had a clever mind.

The festival devolved into fighting and party games soon enough, you thought it was fun to see these Saxon soldiers try to fight your folk, even joining in once or twice to beat a Saxon soldier or two in the face.


	4. Chapter 4

Your return to Kattegat was inevitable, despite the security and land that your father had gained in Wessex, he still had to return home to rule, and you, your mother, and Björn were of course to return with him.

You saw your uncle throw you brother into the rain, obviously drunk from drowning his sorrows with ale from the loss of Siggy. You ran in to interfere, pushing your uncle away from your brother and dragging Björn away from him, while your uncle begged him to hit him. He shrugged you off, punching your uncle again and again. You tugged at Björn’s hand, taking hit and looking at his reddened and cut knuckles, glaring at him.

“Why do you keep picking fights?” You scolded him, rubbing your thumb over the scratches and peeling skin. You shook your head at him, dragging him down to the Great Hall to your mother. 

“Björn?” Your mother sat up in her chair.

“What?” Your brother snapped at your mother, turning his head to look at her.

“He got into a fight with Rollo.” You frowned, slapping your brother on the back of the head.

“You fought Rollo?” Floki turned in his seat to look at your brother. 

“I was trying to stop them from killing him.” Björn protested.

“You were being stupid, your uncle can take care of himself.” You rolled your eyes and smacked your brother again, muttering to himself as he grabbed a cold cloth from a bucket and dabbed at his bloody forehead. You shook your head, sighing.

 

* * *

 

 

You had your fair share of many battles, when your older brother Björn had come back, with your mother in tow and coming to protect your father. Björn protected you when Jarl Borg tried to attack your father, he cradled you when your you were wounded by a sword, even carrying you when you were unable to move. 

Athelstan filled your father with dreams and hopes of the Frankish city called Paris on the journey home, but before you could think about  Paris, you followed your mother to Hedeby, with your father. You held your axe in your hand as you stood behind your mother, eyes narrowed at the people who looked distrustfully at your mother and her soldiers. Come spring you knew that you were going to be following your father and Björn to Paris. You stood watch with your mothers soldiers in  _ her _ halls, looking at the men and women that obviously supported her usurpation. 

“You are not Björn.” Someone approached you. 

You tilted your head to the side. “Earl Ingstad is my mother and King Ragnar is my father.” You rested your axe on your shoulder. “And Björn is my brother.” You lifted your axe to point at the man frowning at you. “When my mother finds out who had a hand in this, I will slaughter all of you.”  You grinned at him. “And I will enjoy it.”

You father reappeared, pausing and smiling at you when he saw your axe drawn.

“Is there a problem here Bragi?” He asked. 

“No… No.” You smiled, returning your axe back to your hip. “Just speaking to these kind people here.”

“Bragi stop trying to scare them. Go to your mother, she’s speaking to Earl Kalf.”  You went the way your father came, smiling down at your mother as she motioned you to sit opposite of Kalf. You raised an eyebrow at him as you sat down.

“Bragi, this is Kalf. Kalf, this is my second son, Bragi Lothbrok.”

“He’s named after the god?”

“He’s been blessed by the god.” Your mother smiled and placed a hand on your arm, rubbing it slowly. “He is his father's son.”

You didn’t see Kalf again until he, Erlendur and Torvi reappeared, arriving in Kattegat to meet your father in light for plans to raid Paris. Erlendur seemed to look at you like he wanted to murder you, you dreaded when he approached you during the feast flinching when he held his hand out towards you, a smirk plain on his face as you struggled to keep a straight face. It was Torvi who saved you from the awkwardness and your fear, bringing Björn behind her as she approached the two of you. You slunk to Björn’s side almost instantly, hiding partially behind him as Björn turned his attention to Erlendur, which in turn dragged his attention away from you.

Paris only seemed like a dream away once Floki had announced that he had finished with the boats, and then, you were preparing to sail. The journey was long and arduous, and you kept yourself company by telling Björn about your fears and how you hoped that he would not die. Your brother kept an arm around your back through most nights, and during the day you stuck by his side, until the silhouette of a large city showed beneath the clouds and you began to rock on your feet in excitement.

“Björn look! Paris!” You grabbed his arm, even though he was already looking.

“I see it Bragi. I see it.” He smiled down at you before stepping up to your father.

You’d set up camp a decent way downriver, setting up a home base before sailing back up towards the city, eyes marvelling at the walls surrounding the large city. You saw archers peek out from over the ramparts and you grabbed your shield, hearing your uncle yell. You ducked down, holding your shield above your head, hearing the thud of arrows, bolts, you noticed when you dropped your shield to look at it for a moment. You stood amazed for a second before a second round of arrows was shot at you. 

Your boats retreated back to camp, where you waited for your father to call council to devise a plan. Your brother, mother and uncle took control of the meeting the minute after Floki announced that he was to lead the raid, making you chuckle slightly.

You looked forward to climbing the towers that you saw Floki building, eyeing the castle walls as Floki lowered them into the water. You climbed into the boats with you brother, raising your shield as they begin to fire the bolts at you. You helped the others push the towers closer to the walls, before pulling yourself and then Björn up onto the platforms. You watched as the first few men began climbing up the towers you and Björn urged them, doing your best to climb up as well, dodging the bolts. You inched your way up the tower, you axe handle beneath your teeth as you slowly climbed to the top. You managed to get part of a way before feeling something stick into your shoulder, causing you hand to slip, grunting against the wood of your axe handle, you turned your head slightly to see a bolt sticking out of your shoulder. You pulled yourself further up the tower and onto the platforms, climbing up the ladder to hack at the Frankish soldiers above you. You could hear Björn shouting below you, urging more people to climb up. You jumped over the tower and into the ramparts, hacking and screaming at the soldiers around you, grunting when one smacked your face to the side. You wiggled your jaw, glaring at him before slamming your axe into the side of his head, ripping it out and grinning when the soldier fell to the floor, his blood pooling. You could hear Björn yelling for you from below the wall, you uncle roaring at people to climb. You took another hit to your chest, knocking the wind out of your lungs, you swung as you gasped. Missing as the soldier ducked back. You ran forward and tackled him, slamming your head into his and knocking your axe into his head, eyes wild and wide. 

Your brother and father had finally come up the tower behind you, hacking and slashing away at the soldiers, covering your back. You scrambled to your feet, only to get charged into the wall and almost tossed over by another soldier, who had his shield shoved under your chin, pinning your arms to your chest. He flipped you over the ramparts, grunting, your head slamming into the wooden platform beneath you as the rests of your body fell into water.

Your sight was hazy as someone fished you out, you murmured something but you didn’t know what it was, or who was carrying you as you felt your head spin. It sounded like you were retreating but everything around you felt slowed down and distorted. You tried to lift your head, tried to look for Björn but you could barely see when you managed to move, it felt like your eye was swollen shut. Your shoulder ached and your body stung, your throat was hoarse from the screaming and the smoke from the burning towers. You tried to swallow, feeling yourself being placed onto a boat, noises and concerned mumbling around you. You felt a blanket being draped over your chest, soft hands over your face and a cool cloth covered your face. 

Back at camp someone rested you in a tent while your eyes were closed, and you could hear your mother talking to whoever was gliding salve onto your shoulder as you lay on your front. You heard a mention of Björn. But you could barely form the words to get your mothers attention, you felt her touch your head, murmur to you, wishing you well, before she left, possibly to tend to your brother. You hoped he was okay, but the ache in your chest, your head and your back felt almost maddening, you could barely move anything but your legs.

It’d been a few hours before you finally managed to move, and the first thing you did was leave your tent looking up into the night sky, and you went to go see Björn, who’s entire chest was wrapped in bandages and his eyes were shut as he lay on a bed, blanket draped over his front. You dropped to your knees next to your brother, whispering softly to him, as if he could possibly hear you.

“Please, don’t die now Björn.” You murmured, brushing his hair out of his face.

You didn’t move from his side, not until you were woken by the sound of him joking with your father. You knelt next to him, fingers slowly grazing over his forehead.

“Hello Bragi.” You saw him tilt his head back to look at you, his eyes meeting yours.  “Have you been waiting for me to wake up?” You chuckled wetly and nodded, pressing your forehead to your brothers before moving in a stilted shuffle on your knees to the side of his bed.

“I was worried.” You murmured. “I know how hurt you were. I spent most of today in a tent, no one told me anything.” He lifted one of his hands to touch the bandages on your shoulder, and then grazed his fingers over the bruises on your chest.

“You’re hurt.” He commented, frowning at the wince you gave him when he poked you.

“Not as bad as you.” You gave him a smile. “I could hear you yelling when i climbed the ladder. I believed in you.” 

“You’re a good brother Bragi, and you fought well.” He met your smile with one of his own, placing a hand on yours, the one that was stroking his hair. He gestured towards the empty bed next to him. “Rest, you need it, we can both get better and help take Paris properly.” 

The next morning it felt like your eye was less swollen as you tried to open it, actually seeing through your eye. You smiled when you saw Björn sitting up, already awake and looking at you.

“You were moving in your sleep.” He did his familiar head tilt. “You look better already, the gods have guaranteed that you healed fast.”

“And you Ironside.” You teased him. “You look better, you’re sitting up.”

“We’ll both be better brother.” He smiled at you. “And then, you can show me those skills you had when you were fighting on the wall.” You laughed at him. 

“I barely did well. I’m not a great fighter yet.”

“You were good enough to survive, and you are a good fighter Bragi, don’t sell yourself short.”

“Thank you Björn.” You slid out of the bed and shuffled over to him, cupping the back of his head and pulling your forehead to his. “Thank you.”

The next morning, after your mother's second attempt at breaching the gates of Paris had failed. You and Björn were well enough to stand, to walk {read: hobble, limp and shuffle) to where your mother and father were, seeing their smiles as they spotted the both of you, your arms around each other, propping each other up. Your mother came to you both first, cupping both your cheeks and smiling at you two.

“Oh my sons, you might as well be twins look at you.” She leaned in and pressed both your foreheads to hers, her eyes bright. “I’m grateful the gods have given you blessings for a swift recovery.” 

Your father nodded at the two of you from where he sat when your mother pulled away, smiling at you both. Your father didn’t look ill, but he didn’t look healthy either, his skin looked clammy and red, and his eyes looks stressed.

You tilted your head at him, you and Björn split apart, as you heard the Frankish soldiers riding up towards you all. Björn limped forward first, you reaching for an axe behind him, eyes on the soldiers behind Sinric on their horses.

You frowned when everyone started yelling at each other, and your father stumbled up, clutching his stomach as he berated your mother, and Erlendur, and Björn, Rollo, Kalf and Floki. He doubled over, coughing blood, before deciding to meet the Franks.

You limped and hopped away from the crowd, under the tent your father laid onto and dropping yourself onto the makeshift bed your father had made, groaning and covering your head and eyes from the sun. You must have fallen asleep there, because you woke up to Björn shaking your uninjured shoulder, sitting you up.

“Bragi, you can’t sleep out here.” 

You mumbled something at him, shoving his hand away before he practically hauled you over your shoulder, despite you being his build and almost his height. You yelped at him, resisting from slapping his back like you wanted to, before feeling you chest and shoulder ache at your efforts to wiggle free.

“Björn put me down right now! I can walk.” 

“No.” Your brother said firmly, carrying you across to your shared tent and dumping you, carefully but unceremoniously dumping you onto your bed. “Rest, here.” He sat in his own bed opposite yours. 

The next morning, your father had disappeared on his own without your mother and the others, and when they’d come back you heard rumours that your father was a Christian man, however those rumours were shut down by the ones of your father being ill and too sick. You approached your fathers coffin once Björn gave you and others permission to speak to him.

You knelt next to your fathers coffin, chest tighter than you thought it could have ever been. “I always resented you for driving Björn and mother away. I hated you for it.” You patted the coffin. “But you still loved me, but you didn’t love Björn and I as much as you loved my younger brothers. I’ll see you in Valhalla father.

You marched behind your father’s coffin, singing with the rest of your folk, Björn wrapped an arm around your shoulder and squeezed gently before dropping his arm and moving to the front of the men. Your eyes were red-rimmed, cheeks flushed. You stared at the gates that were closed to you, eyes wet and your jaw clenched. 

When your father opened the doors, and Björn raised his hands as a signal, you gripped your axe, eyes snapping to Björn, and your mother. That night, everyone yelled at Björn for not telling them that Ragnar was still alive. You said nothing to him, instead patting his shoulder, forcing a smile after he confirmed that you were heading home to Kattegat, but returning to Paris in the Spring.

The journey home was rough and sore, your shoulder ached even worse when the waves rocked your boat and slammed you against the ship. You bundled yourself against your brother, who held you close and tried to cushion you as best as you could. You appreciated your brother, draping his blanket over you and holding you close, taking care of you like he always promised to do. He stroked your fringe and pushed your damp hair out of your face, smiling down at you.

You really did love your brother.

You returned home just in time for winter to hit, wrapped in furs and your blanket as you stepped off the boat, Björn was at your side, although, not for long, when he went looking for Þorrun and your niece Siggy. You followed your father to your stepmother, picking up Sigurd and Ubbe in your arms, smiling at the both of them.

“Why do you keep growing without me?” You asked them both, laughing as Ubbe wriggled out of your hands, Sigurd throwing his around your shoulders and hugging you tight. You grunted under his grip, as his arm pressed against your shoulder wound, but you gave him a smile when he lifted his eyes to look at you.

“I’m fine, Sigurd.” You murmured to your brother, using your Ubbe-free hand to stroke his hair out of his face. You carried your brother as you followed your father and step-mother back to the Great Hall, resting Sigurd on your hip while you walked. Glad that you were home.

Your brother surprised you, coming into the Great hall right after your brothers had finished playing. He smiled at you, after greeting your younger brothers. “Bragi.” He smiled at you. You knew your brother was distraught that Þorrun  and even more so that she left behind Siggy.


	5. Chapter 5

When Björn arrested Floki for killing Athelstan and then left to go to the wilderness, you felt abandoned once again. Your brother didn’t want to be around your father despite loving him. Everyone had hated Floki but you, you felt so much pain and pity when the people of Kattegat turned against him, even though you didn’t agree with him.  Even with your phantom aches and pains from your injuries, the last four years of early combat with your father had left your body scarred and relentlessly battered, you were forced to help your younger brothers search for Floki, anger in your eyes when they and your father humiliated him. You helped Helga chase away the children that were tormenting him, staring and glaring at them, even threatening some of the older ones with your axe, when they threw dirt, mud and shit at him. You babysat Angrboda when Helga brought food to Floki, taking care of him. Between protecting Floki and tending to some of your father’s duties, you spent your time with Björn pouring over the map that he’d taken from a man in Paris, talking about his destiny, and maybe sharing it with you. You helped Helga with his punishment after he had escaped, doing the best that you could to relieve the ache and pains for both of them. You helped Helga hold a bowl of water above Floki’s head when you could, you brought them food and water whenever you could.

Now, as you sat in the great hall with your family as your people carried in the Yule log, and as they praised your father and wished him well, as games continued on until a mans boots were lit aflame. You had sent Sigurd to go play with his older brothers with a kiss to his forehead. Your step-mother left the celebrations to care for your youngest half-brother Ivar. You resented the lack of your brothers presence, Björn’s presence. You wanted your brother back, to be able to enjoy your celebrations with endless mead and your brother’s arm around your shoulders, and without responsibility or care for your half-siblings, the last few years of your life spent devoted to caring for them and shielding them while resenting your step-mother for driving your mother and brother away. A fresh air of celebration before the seriousness of all your family’s affairs caused more trouble.

You stood to attention when Hvitserk ran into the great Hall and was followed by a man who claimed himself to be a king. Your eyes travelled across to the man himself claiming to be from Tamdrup and the warriors that followed him, talking small of his kingdom and paying his praises toward your father. You stayed mostly out of his line of sight, watching him talk, memorizing his face and the faces of the men that came with him.

“My kingdom is small, you will not have heard of it.” Your ears caught the air of conversation between your step-mother and this man.

“I have heard of it now. Tell me King Harald why have you come here?” Your step-mother asked. You moved closer, revealing yourself to place a hand on the back of her chair, your other hand hovering over your axe.

“The wanderers sing praises of your husband, they tell stories of his journeys far and wide. His raids upon England and Paris. He is a famous man. Why would I not want to meet him in person? Sit at his feet? And talk to him? But where, may I ask, might he be?” 

“You will see him soon enough.” Your step-mother assured as you stepped back with a pat to your step-mother's shoulder. She looked at you, giving you a smile before nodding, and you stepped back, your presence mostly unnoticed. 

Through the celebrations where Harald and his men were drinking and loudly caught in drunken conversation, you perched in the dark watching over your brothers and King Harald’s men, keeping an eye on the man who made himself the centre of the room and of the attention all at once. He didn’t really seem to notice your presence, maybe because you kept yourself quiet.

“Let's play hnefatafl! Huh?” King Harald suggested when he'd noticed Ubbe eyeing him. As the other men scrambled to get the board for the game Harald crept his way casually over towards your parents thrones. 

“I'll play the King!” He announced as he sat into your father's throne, offering Hvitserk the first move. Your step-mother moved over to him sitting down in her own throne, you paced, circling the room on the fringes of the party, making your way over to the thrones..

“I going to ask you once more, why did you really come here?” Your step-mother asked. You slipped up next to your step-mother’s throne, propping your chin up with your hand, elbow on the back of the chair as you listened, intrigued.

“I made someone a promise.”

“Who?” 

“A girl, a princess. I wanted to marry her but she turned me down.” You frowned at that, why would a princess turn someone like that down. He certainly looked and behaved like a good man, even if you were wary and suspicious.

“Why did she turn you down?”

“I wasn't important enough, she had other offers.” You felt bad for the man now, and you pulled a stool from behind you, over to an empty a space and sat, watching the expression carefully.

“Why didn't you just take her?”

“That's a good question Queen Aslaug, but uh I don't know. I liked her spirit I decided I had to be worthy of her.”

“How could you do that?:

“By making myself king of all Norway, then she would marry me for sure.” He lifted his cup towards his men, eliciting loud cheers from them. Your hand moved to your axe, eyes narrowing at him, any feeling of pity that you had left had mostly vanished.

“But in order to become king of all Norway you'd have to overthrow my husband.” You slid your hand down the handle of your axe, raising your eyebrow at the man when he finally looked at you, meeting your blue eyes.

He dropped his attention to your brothers as they beat his king, smiling good naturedly down at them. A good loser, or so he seemed. He lifted his eyes back up to yours and raised an eyebrow at your stare. You smiled, your hand shifting to your axe, and he noticed, the smiled slipping off his face, but he still looked smug.

When you noticed Björn returned, with Torvi in tow, you almost felt relieved. Haralds appearance so suddenly into Kattegat had left you feeling reserved, wary for your family. Bjőrn was no doubt smarter than you were. You knew men underestimated him because he appeared to be a bumbling oaf a majority of the time but you knew how smart your brother was as he kept quiet about his identity, blending into the crowd. Your father however, came up behind Björn and greeted him, then shoved his way to the front of the crowd and lifted his drink to his mouth, eyeing the king, his brow furrowed.

“And you are?”

 

* * *

“Who is he?” Björn asked.

“You heard he's a king, from Tamdrup? where ever that is?”

“And you trust him?”

“No.”

“I don't trust him either. But it seems Bragi might be too interested him.”

“Your brother’s just curious, you know how he is. He clings to people who treat him well, or show interest in him. Or if they’re somewhat different from the rest of our family.”

You were helping Björn and your father with the boats, carrying shields and crates with supplies to and from them, noting the presence of King Harald among the docks with his own men. As you brought your crates over to King Harald and his men your eyes lingered over the tattoos on his face and the bright red cloth he wore, curiosity overtaking you as you handed off the crate you carried and opened your mouth to speak, only to be interupted by Björn.

“How many boats do you have?” Your brother called out from behind you, dragging your attention from King Harald to the stern look on Björns face. 

“Twenty boats, about six hundred men. I told Ragnar mine is a small kingdom. For now.”

“And when will they arrive?” Björn asked with a glance to you, subtly shaking his head at you, before picking up a crate and sorting through it.

“They must already be on their way. My brother Halfdan is bringing them.”

“And is your brother like you?”

“No he is much worse.” Harald chuckled. “He is much worse.” You felt your ears perk up, pursing your lips slightly in interest. In all honesty, to you, his brother sounded fun.

“You have such ambitions.”

“What else is there? What are we here for but to achieve fame. Just like your father. Isn't that what you want too, Björn Lothbrok? Be honest.”

“You don't know me. And fame won't make your small kingdom any bigger.” 

You stood still as Björn walked away, as King Harald's face dropped and he scoffed before turning his head to nod towards your father, unaware that you were even watching him.

You decided to take a risk, stepping closer to him. “You say your brother is bringing your men?” You asked quietly, busying yourself with another crate of supplies.

“Yes.” He turned his head to look at you, eyes running over your form, he definitely looked like he was wondering who you are. “And you are?”

“Bragi.” You offered, smirking. “Bragi Lothbrok. Second son of Ragnar. It’s a pleasure.”

“I saw you in the Hall, but I did not realize Ragnar had another older son, although now I can see your eyes match your brother’s, and your father's exactly.” He said, moving a crate from next to his feet and placing it into a boat.

“I am not in search for fame, or recognition, I am my mother’s son, I only want to support my family.” You moved to lift an empty crate from the stack next to you. “So my presence needs not to be named.”

“If only all men were as humble as you.” King Harald chuckled and you rolled your eyes.

“Not humble. But curious. Your brother’s name sounds familiar?” You turned your head to look at him, hands still working.

“Yes he has, a reputation attached to it. He’s often known as Halfdan the Black. I’m sure you’ve heard of him.” You nodded, having nothing else to say. Nothing else to ask this man.

“I will go then.” You said, lifting the empty crate and gesturing with it, slipping a smile onto your face as you met King Harald’s eyes. “More work to be done.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

It was among the markets when you noticed King Harald with your brother, his hair unbound as he was brushing it. You did not want to intrude, watching from behind a pole as he invited your brother to come sit with him and they chatted, before he began to goad and cheer with his men. Your brother stood, before he walked away from him with a plain look of disgust and you leaned against the pole, watching Harald interact with his men. King Harald was an interesting man, with an interesting smile and words that shaped interesting stories to tell.

You were there on the port, when King Harald had gone to greet his brother and the rest of his arriving men. You admit that you’d been following him around, interested, curious, wanting to know more about him and his ambitions, and furthermore, his brother. You couldn't help the smile on your face when you noticed the happiness when he and who you guessed to be his brother embraced, jumping in happiness to see each other. They turned to walk down the port, arms around each other and it reminded you of yourself and Björn. You met with their party as they walked to meet your father, watching ‘Halfdan’, trying to figure out everything about him just from looking at him.

King Harald was right about what he had said to your brother. His brother was different. Where Harald exuded firmness and a serious presence. Halfdan was intense, he seemed to be so much more chaotic but he was also as still as a statue when he stood. His voice was smoother than his brothers and it rang in your ears while he spoke with Harald, it held so much emotion but at the same time you couldn’t pinpoint anything about how he felt. He had brown eyes and light hair, and tattoos that spanned all the visible skin on his face twisting and turning on his skin and onto the back of his head from what you could see, even under his hair. Halfdan wasn’t just different, you felt a blush cross upon your cheeks, he looked like he was descended from the gods, he looked like he held all the mysteries the gods could offer you, wrapped into a single human being.

You accidentally walked into the back of one of King Harald’s men, apologizing, before pushing your way to the front of the crowd, nudging King Harald with your shoulder before going to stand closer to your father.

“King Ragnar! This is my brother Halfdan.” King Harald announced, clapping his brother on the back.

Your father continued to throw his knives into the shield, without responding to King Harald. You smirked, your father was jealous, jealous about King Harald and how everyone, including your step-mother reacted to him, how he seemed to already gain the innocent affections from the people of Kattegat.

“Meet the notorious King Ragnar, and his second son Bragi.” King Harald introduced your father to Halfdan, and then gestured to you, a smile on his face, catching the look you gave his brother.

“It is a great honour.” Halfdan seemed enamoured with your father instead of notice you, but you did not mind, it gave you more time to watch him, reading his face and his eyes, the curiosity he directed towards your father. “When do we sail for Paris?”

You chuckled to yourself as your father did not respond so easily, rolling your eyes at your him being so petty.

“You seem eager to fight.”

“Yes! It is true. Not just for the sake of fighting but for the beauty of it.” Halfdan said poetically, you tilted your head while staring at him. “And against the Christians yes, I hate the Christians. In the name of Odin I will kill them all.” He tacked on at the end after glancing at his brother. You thought he seemed incredibly unsettled by the lack of responses from your father and how involved he was in his own thoughts

“You'll have the opportunity to kill a great number of them. Once we reach Paris.”

That night at the celebration and feast that your father, you sat only a table away from them both, peeking over at King Harald and Halfdan over your drink, your curiosity growing when you caught Halfdan softly smiling of all things at his brother. You took another mouthful of your drink and sighed, what a fool you must have looked like, sitting on your own, watching two strangers who landed on your shores.

“Bragi!” King Harald called out to you, taking you by surprise. “Come and sit with us, all that staring makes it look like you're pining for one or both of us.” He lifted his cup and gestured you over to the both of them.

You felt your cheeks heat, and you knew your pale skin must have betrayed the blush that settled across your cheeks at what King Harald implied, you hoped the lighting in the Great Hall left it so they’d assume your flush was from the mead. You ducked your head but made your way over to them nonetheless, taking the empty seat on Halfdan’s right hand side, raising your cup at King Harald in a greeting

“I hope my brother has not offended you.” Halfdan said. His voice was quiet, more than his brother’s, it sounded raspier, a slightly different tone in his words as he leaned in to speak over the chaos of your surroundings. “He does enjoy his jokes.” He patted a hand over yours on the table. You ran your teeth over your bottom lip, giving him a smile, your fingers curling beneath his hand before he slid it off, leaving it on the table next to you.

“He’s not offended me. I apologize for staring, it was rather rude of me.” You finished the rest of the drink in your cup and motioned to a servant girl for more, thanking her kindly when she filled it again.

“No need to, tell us why?” Harald asked before taking another drink from his.

“I admit I am curious.” You look down at your cup. “You’re new to Kattegat, I’ve seen many new things, new people, but you two are different, you remind me of my relationship with my older brother.” You shrugged and tipped your cup from side to side, watching your mead sway to the rim. “I'm curious about you, Halfdan. Your brother spoke highly of you before you arrived here in Kattegat. I want to know more about you. The both of you.”

“It is a blessing, to have a brother like Halfdan.” King Harald murmured, eyes meeting yours. “We are close in age and he has always been loyal to me.”

Björn walked in, eyes scanning the tables and frowning when he found you seated with Harald and his brother. He stopped next to your table, clapping a hand on your shoulder. You stood up, giving him a hug, pressing your forehead to his. “Hello Björn.” You smiled at him, eyes flicking to Torvi. “And to you Torvi. Good to see you both.”

“And you little brother.” Björn smiled down at you, before glancing at King Harald and Halfdan, his smile replaced with a serious expression.

“They say he left Kattegat a boy, and came back a man.” Harald began to say, leaning forward to his brother. “Killed a bear with his bare hands.”

“With his own hands?” Halfdan looked amazed. Most people were when they met your brother, you couldn’t help but laugh, even men who you thought were descended from the gods seemed so enamoured with him.

The music stopped as Helga and Floki entered the Hall. You gave Floki and Helga a wave, and before you could, Harald invited both him and Helga to sit with you and his brother, shooing his men away to make space for them.

“This is my younger brother Halfdan, he is keen to know you.” You smiled as Harald spoke, giving Helga a soft smile when she met your eyes. You reached over the brothers to pat Floki’s hand, giving him a reassuring smile.

“So you are the genius that built the boats that helped change our world and helped made Ragnar so famous!” Halfdan seemed so excited to see Floki it made your smile wider or perhaps it was his enthusiasm in his voice that seemed to brighten the room and those around you. “Why would he fall out with someone like you?”

“Because I killed his pet Christian.”

“Floki!” Helga chastised him as the brothers were taken aback.

“Skol.” You lifted your drink in response when Harald and Floki raised their cups. You turned your head slightly to watch Halfdan as he sipped his drink. Your eyes traced the tattoos that wound across his forehead and then across at the matching ones on his brothers face. You took a deep breath, you realized that you might have been a little more than infatuated with Halfdan than you meant to be, despite only just having met him.

“So Bragi,” Halfdan turned his attention to you after his introductions to Floki and a quick chat. You immediately snapped out of your own thoughts, focusing on the man in front of you “You are Ragnar’s second son? You must be coming with us to Paris then.” You smiled at that, eyes scanning his, noting the exact shade of brown that they were.

“Of course. I was there when my father first laid siege to Paris, and I promised I would go back again.” You looked over to Björn, smiling softly at the sight of your brother, you took another drink and turned back to look Halfdan in the eye. “Björn and I both were injured. No one thought he would survive. He’ll want me by his side again.”

“You could sail with us?” Halfdan offered, leaning in closer, keeping your gaze locked with his “It would be an honour to have you on our boat with us.” He lifted his cup to his mouth and took a sip without breaking eye contact. “I could show you more of what you are curious about. And I am sure you have questions would you like to ask.” His eyes dipped down to the redness of your cheeks and he smirked, smug, his tongue poking out and licking the top of his lip, hand ghosting over your fingers. He leaned in to whisper into your ear. “I would gladly have you.” His breath puffed against your cheek.

Your fingers shook slightly as you curled them against the table, scratching your nails against the grain of the wood. Your cheeks went bright red now, eyes meeting his when he pulled away from you, smug and smirking. “I’d have to ask Björn, he likes me to sail with him.” You held your cup in front of your mouth. “But I would love to take you up on your offer.”

As the celebrations continued the conversation moved from plans in Paris, to stories about King Harald’s raids and exploits to appease his princess, to some more, intimate exploits from both brothers and some of the older warriors. Some of them who were with you in Mercia told the brothers about your ‘night’ with the Mercian Queen, Kwentrith, they laughed when you ducked your head with a blush. You threw the piece of bread that you had from a servant girl at the man, laughing at him to shut up. Halfdan nudged your shoulder with his or placed a hand on your thigh and squeezed, grinning at you with a bright smile as if he knew he was teasing you, when someone brought up something particularly raunchy or interesting. You kept your drink to your lips, keeping your cup constantly refilled as an excuse for the flush on your cheeks and how close you were leaning to Halfdan.

Later that night you stumbled out of the Great Hall with an arm around Halfdan, the older man smirking at the lack of balance you had, one hand curled on his shoulder, the other on his chest, clutching onto his tunic like you didn’t want to let him go. King Harald didn’t look like he wanted to leave his brother but he was entertained, laughing as you swayed against him, plastering yourself to his side.

“I’ll take Bragi back to his home, wherever that is.” You heard Halfdan offer, smiling at his brother. “I’ll find my own way back, or get this one to take me when he’s sober.” He patted your braid and laughed.

You gave him directions to your house, still clinging to him desperately. He pushed your door open before helping you up the steps. He chuckled down at you, before you switched from leaning on him, to clutching the wooden door frame, you swung closer to him, smiling.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t want to stay the night. You could get lost?” You slid one of your hands down your side, tucking your fingers into the waistband of your pants.

“As tempting as you are, Prince Bragi.” He placed a hand on your cheek, before dropping it to your chest and pulling you closer gently, leaning in to whisper in your ear. “I wouldn't want to take take advantage.”

He pulled away, revelling in your red cheeks. “Good night, my prince.” He smiled at you, the way he did it left something fiercely hot rearing up inside you. You closed the door, as he walked away, shucking off your tunic and stumbling towards your bed. It never occurred to your drunk self that the way you looked at him, was the way he looked at you.

The next morning you groaned, as the sunlight filtered through your windows and onto your face, your body was sore, as you stretched and your head pounded, you rolled onto your side to go back to sleep, only to fall out of bed. You stumbled to your feet, squeezing your eyes shut for a long time before opening them again. You opened the door, making a face at the bright light outside before stumbling out. You made your way to the Great Hall in search for some food and water for the headache you had.

On your way there you stumbled into Halfdan, who caught you as you tripped over his boot. He gave you a knowing smile, and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“What’re you smiling about? Hmm?” You asked him, straightening yourself up.

“Well for one.” He raised his eyebrows at you. “You’re not wearing a shirt, it’s a good view.” You glanced down at your tattooed chest and abdomen before groaning. “And two, I’m thinking you don’t remember much of last night, seeing as I had to carry you to your home.” You dropped your head at that and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Since you’re all for carrying me then.” You lifted your chin to smile at him, before squinting at the sun and poking your tongue out at it. “Mind carrying me to the Great hall so I can get some breakfast. I’ll let you share?”

Halfdan smirked before sweeping his arm under your knees, pulling you to his chest, laughing at your surprise as you threw your arms around his neck and clutched onto him for dear life. He carried you into the Great Hall, where his brother and a few of their men sat already eating breakfast. He dumped you unceremoniously onto the empty end of the table, laughing when you grunted before rolling off and onto the floor. King Harald’s men laughed at that, raising their cups to you when you stood, dusting yourself off and pressing your hands against your spine, cracking it.

“Please don’t tell me that’s more mead.” You groaned, rubbing your eyes before stretching your arms above your head.

“It is water, Prince Bragi.” You met King Harald’s eyes at that.

“Don’t call me that.” You sluggishly made your way over to the empty seat next to one of Harald’s men. “I’m not one for titles.” You grabbed bread from the centre plate and started stuffing ripped pieces of it into your mouth.

“Sorry.” He smiled at you. “I hope my brother brought you home safely and that he didn’t steal you off somewhere to have his way with you.” Halfdan chuckled at that from opposite you, as King Harald’s men laughed.

“Well I don’t remember much.” You said with a full mouth before swallowing your food. “But I woke up in my own bed, so I think he did just fine.” You shot Halfdan a smile. “I bumped into him on the way here, it was his decision to carry me in.”

“Well I’m glad the two of you are getting along so well.” King Harald chuckled. “It warms my heart.”

“Your cold heart brother.” Halfdan joked as he stuffed a piece of meat into your mouth.

“I have the warmer heart out of the two of us brother.” You raised an eyebrow at Halfdan, smirking at him.

“So Bragi, out of curiosity how old are you and your brother Björn?” King Harald asked from behind his cup.

You paused for a moment, thinking back to your last birthday. “Björn just turned twenty-three, I turned twenty-two in the spring.” You focused on Halfdan as he dropped his cup onto the table, looking sheepish.

“So you’ve been, fighting with your father for how long?”

You put your food down, propping your elbows on the table and your chin on your clasped hands. “I fought against the Northumbrians, when I was sixteen, so I’ve been fighting with my father for the last six years.”

“You’re young, and a great warrior then,” King Harald lifted his cup to you.

“My brother Björn is a better warrior than me, you’d be amazed to see him fight. He’s almost like Baldur, nothing can touch him.” You chuckled at your own words, shaking your head at yourself. “Besides, from last night, I heard that the both of you are great warriors. Tell me more?”

“We may have tales of being great warriors,” Harald glanced at his brother. “Of being ruthless warriors, but we have years on you Bragi. We’ve had a long time to make our names and our titles.”

“You’re what, ten, twelve years older than me? If I was to take a guess.” You shrugged. “Ten years can be considered nothing if you look at what my father has done.”

“I’m eleven years older than you. And I’m the younger brother.” Halfdan smiled over his drink. "But don't underestimate what an early start brings." 

"Either way, you're all great warriors nonetheless, especially if you are a King." You gestured to a servant girl for a cup, giving her a warm smile when she filled it. You took a sip of your drink, turning your attention to King Harald. "Why do your people call you King Finehair, surely there's a story behind that." Halfdan chuckled, when Harald flipped his hair over his shoulder.

"My people, call me King Finehair because I promised that I would never cut my hair until the woman I loved married me." He took his braid into his hands, showing it off slightly. "Until I am worthy of my princess so she will marry me, I can and will never cut my hair."  Your expression softened at that, eyes on his neat braid. 

"I would say that you're already worthy enough for her." You commented, sipping on your drink. "You seem like a good man, an ambitious man. Ambition is not a fault, and you have proved your dedication to her haven't you?" Harald looked comforted by your words, as he let go of his braid and lifted his cup. You nodded your head slightly at him as he raised his cup forward to tap it against yours.

"That is kind of you to say Pr-, Bragi." He gave you a small smile. "But I am not yet important enough for her." He paused to drink. He put his cup down on the table and leaned forward slightly. "Hopefully this raid to Paris with your father may help."

"That, and your ambition to be King of all Norway?" You hoped you didn't come across as accusing as you asked curiously. King Harald chuckled as Halfdan put down his food to look at you properly. 

"You are smart Bragi." He gave you a wider smile, although it didn't seem too friendly in context. "It is true, I believe that becoming King of all Norway would make me important enough for my princess..." He propped his elbows onto the table. "But I'm sure that if we become allies, another arrangement could be made." His smile dropped. "But we will see what happens after Paris hmm?" Before you could respond you could hear the familiar sound of Sigurd's voice whispering playfully from behind the netting that separated your younger brothers beds from the Great Hall. Sigurd and Hvitserk came tumbling out from where they seemed to be perched, behind the crates they kept their toys in, probably eavesdropping on you and your conversation.

"Sigurd! Hvitserk!" You climbed to your feet and halfheartedly jogged over to your brothers, picking them both up in your arms. "What are you two doing?" You scolded them, before glancing over to the King Harald and Halfdan. They watched as you brought your brothers over to the table, dropping them and yourself onto the wooden seats. Hvitserk wiggled away from you almost immediately, poking his tongue out at you playfully before he ran off, probably to go find Ubbe and bother his older brother. Sigurd however sat calmly in your lap, looking both at Halfdan and Harald curiously.

"King Harald, Halfdan, this is my younger brother Sigurd." You glanced around the Great Hall before leaning forward and whispering playfully, close to Sigurds ear. "My favourite brother, after Björn of course." You ruffled Sigurd's hair as he giggled up at you, before making grabby hands at the bread on your plate. The brothers seemed amused as you pushed your plate closer to him.

"One would've assumed he was your son." One of Harald's men chimed in. The few that were at your table kept quiet or muttered to yourself while you, Harald and Halfdan spoke to each other. "You certainly act like his father." As Sigurd chewed on the piece of bread he shoved in his mouth, you met the mans eyes. 

"Oh no, I could never replace Ragnar as his father." You left your hand in Sigurd's hair, scratching his head lightly and affectionately. "He's just the brother I spend time with the most, besides Björn, he handles most responsibility with my father. Ubbe and Hvitserk like to explore and follow the hunting parties. You glanced down at the small boy in your lap. "Sigurd, stays here in town, with my step-mother and our littlest brother Ivar. He's a sweet boy." You smiled softly before returning your gave to Harald's men. "Besides I would never want the responsibility of raising children, I would be horrid at it, I want to run off and explore the world, there must be other places than just England and Frankia, I wouldn't do that if I had children." 

Halfdan nodded as you brought up travel. It seemed like you found someone other than Björn who appreciated the idea of freedom as much as you did. You felt Sigurd wiggle in your hold, before slipping out of your grasp and wandering off. He must've gotten bored with the idle chatter. "Go find your brothers!" You called out after him as he reached the doors of the Great Hall. He turned around and waved to all of you, a cute smile on his face before he ran off. You smiled fondly after him before turning back to face Harald and Halfdan.

"It's very, honourable of you, to be so close to your brothers despite not sharing the same mother." You inhaled sharply, eyes flicking to King Harald as he spoke. "It is not easy, when they aren't entirely your family." You scoffed, finishing your drink.

"They are entirely my family. They were raised with me their entire lives." You propped your elbows on the table. "Just because Earl Ingstad is my mother and Queen Aslaug is theirs, does not mean that they aren't my family." You glanced between him and Halfdan. "Would you care about Halfdan if the two of you didn't share the same mother?" You stood from the table, eyes slightly narrowed. "Family is everything to me King Harald. Honour has nothing to do with it." You walked away from them, wondering if maybe you were a little harsh with your words. You scrunched your face up, hoping you didn't offend him.

"Bragi!" You heard Halfdan call out from behind you. You stopped and glanced over your shoulder. Halfdan jogged up to you, patting a hand on your shoulder before he came around to face you. "I'm sorry for my brother. He has different views, some of which aren't entirely normal, but he does understand that family is important."

"That doesn't excuse what he said." You tilted your head to the side. "My brothers are my brothers. Who cares that we do not share the same mother? We're all sons of Ragnar Lothbrok." 

"I know," He held your shoulders. "I know and I understand. Hopefully this doesn't, change the friendship we have?" He searched your face for a clue. You let out a small laugh, shaking your head and meeting his eyes.

"No, no. Maybe I got too offended over a small comment." You patted his shoulder. "I still look forward to continue being friends with you and your brother. You don't have to worry." You spotted Björn over Halfdan's shoulder, waving you over to him. You patted his shoulder again before gesturing to Björn with your chin. "Duty calls. I will come find you and your brother later, if you aren't busy." You gave him one last smile before slipping out of his grip on your shoulders and jogging over to Björn.


	7. Chapter 7

When your father called for a meeting and everyone was to attend, you found yourself in the Great Hall once again with another drink in hand, you sat between Floki and Halfdan, instead of standing with beside Björn as your younger brothers swore to serve your father as their king. With your chin resting on your clasped hands, you felt a firm hand pat your thigh gently. You glanced down to see Halfdan’s hand, slowed to a stop as he noticed he caught your attention. He gave you a small smirk from beneath his hair covering the side of his face and squeezed gently.

“You do not stand with your family.” He leaned close to your ear and commented in a soft whisper. “Why is that?”

“I don’t need to be.” You said, barely parting your lips, eyes flicking to meet Halfdan’s. “And I'd like to be around friends, new friends.” You admitted, ducking your head so that no one saw you two whispering.

Halfdan leaned in even closer, dragging his chair nearer to you with his ankles and his hand squeezed your thigh again. “I'm glad that your father let you sail with us. I'm glad that you chose us, whatever the circumstances.” He smiled and nudged your shoulder with his, before easing his drink into your hands and nudging it close to your mouth. “Drink.”

You smiled and took a sip, Halfdan’s hand still firm on your thigh, his fingers tapping against you, toasting the glass to him before turning to face Floki, who was watching you intently. King Harald unaware of his brother whispering with you. Floki gave the both of you a look, before Ragnar's voice pulled your attention again.

After your brothers put on their armrings, the servants brought out more food and drinks. With the introduction of Harald's men, it seemed like every day was half work and half play, in addition to the Yuletide season, you were starting to get sick of drinking mead every time you needed to wash down some meat. You kept your eyes on your brothers as King Harald and Halfdan began questioning Floki more about Paris and the city that lay between it's walls. Björn looked over to you from where he was sitting with Torvi and shot you a grin, it made you relax and you thought that everything would be alright.

* * *

  
  


Preparations for Paris went incredibly smoothly, and with Harald's men and ships, it wasn't long before you found yourself sailing with Helga, Floki, King Harald and Halfdan instead of your father and Björn and your siblings. You had asked Björn the night before Ubbe and Hvitserk received their armrings after  everyone had either passed out for the night or had wandered off home after another feast. The brothers had waited for you at the door. You thought maybe Björn would have been either annoyed or angry, but he looked slightly sorry for you after he caught you glancing over your shoulder to them eagerly. He was against it, originally, ready to throw an all too familiar fit about you even wanting to to sail with someone else but your father placed a hand on his arm.

"He's just like you." Your father said to Björn even though his eyes were trained on you. "He's becoming a man too Björn. Let him make his own decisions." He had given you a wary smile, and with a pat of Björn's hand on your shoulders, you bounded out to tell King Harald and Halfdan the news.

“So Floki how are you feeling?” King Harald asked as he came up from behind you, breaking you out of your thoughts as he placed a hand on Floki's shoulder, looking down at him.

“I am happy, I feel among friends.” Floki sounding so happy made you happy. Floki was like your uncle and since Rollo had stayed behind to watch over the camp after your first raid, Floki filled the absent uncle image with his own support for you.

“That's because you are among friends, my dear Floki. You and us, we're the same. I feel it in my heart’s core.” Halfdan lamented, you smiled when Halfdan said that, he seemed to feel everything and be as honest about it as he could.

“But uh… tell us honestly, wouldn't you rather be travelling with Ragnar?” You turned to look at Floki, eyes soft.  

“No. I'm here with my new friends. Who love the gods as much as I do. And would never betray them.” You smiled at that and crouched down to lean in and press your forehead to Floki’s. He met your smile with a wide one of his own.

“You will always be an uncle to me Floki. You’re part of my family.” You patted a hand on his shoulder enthusiastically. “You can always trust me.”

As the travel dragged on, you sat yourself down next to Halfdan, the only empty space left on the boat, with your coat wrapped around you tightly. It was evening, and the sky was already darkening, the orange hue of the sun being blocked out by ominous dark clouds rolling in from ahead of you. When night fell over the boats and thunder and lightning began to strike and the rain had seemed to approach from ahead of you, droplets illuminating in the lighting, you tucked yourself into Halfdan’s side, shivering slightly as the thunder resonated around you. You weren't really a fan of thunder during the night, you never have been, the sounds while supposed to be Thor banging his hammer on his anvil, scared you more than you'd like to admit.

“Not used to the cold are you?” Halfdan asked you quietly, turning his head against the wind so that yours was practically tucked into the crook of his neck. You ducked your head in closer to his shoulder, accidentally knocking your forehead to his chin. He gave you a chuckle, his hand coming up to give your forehead a rub. His calloused fingers were gentle when they rubbed over your skin, soothing the throb. His beard didn't do much to cushion the hit.

“The cold is fine.” You shivered despite your claim as the first few drops of rain began to pelt onto your furs, the sails and wood of the boat. “I'm not exactly... too fond of thunder.” You blinked hard against the wind and then the pelting torrent of rain that came down, echoing against the wood of the boat. Halfdan laughed and pulled you closer to him. 

“A warrior such as yourself afraid of some loud noises?” He teased you, you did not know how to respond. He opened up his cloak and outstretched his arm wrapping both you and him in it, smiling to himself and pulling you flush against him. “We can't have that can we.” His eyes were soft as he looked down at you, as he reached with his other hand to pull the edge of his cloak over you. 

Your cheeks went red from embarrassment, you weren’t used to someone teasing you and being remotely playful like this almost every time you spoke, being around Björn and family most of your life. “If you want to mock me you could at least not be so nice about it, it makes it harder.” You mumbled, feeling shy and turned your face away, only to have to turn back to face him as the cold wind bit at your cheek. He paused from where he was rearranging the blankets that were around you.

“Now now I'm not mocking you.” He scoffed before nudging his nose against your cheek and his hand cupped your chin, tilting your head to meet his eyes. “I'm just teasing, has no one bothered teasing you before Bragi?”

You shook your head slowly, your eyes still locked on his. “No uh… I never…” You were lost for words. Your hesitation made his smile widen and he chuckled. It was a softer, smoother sound than the laughter he bellowed out in the great Hall. “I'm not the first choice of when it comes to the people in Kattegat, nor do I try to be.” Halfdan tilted his head, with a small frown on his lips, his chuckle trailing off.

“Why not?” He sounded so offended, that no one paid you any attention or bothered to tease you till your cheeks were flushed and red. You shrugged, slowly shaking your head. You never tried to put yourself out there, it wasn't your thing, no one quite caught your eye with any kind of romantic or sexual interest or ever made you feel something more than just plain curiosity and excitement.

“I suppose now I've flustered you, or offended you. One of the two.” He gave what you thought he hoped was a reassuring smile and squeezed your arm with his hand. “I do hope it is the former, but if you'd like, I'll keep watch over you while you try and sleep through this storm.” He squeezed your shoulders with the arm he had slung around you to draw you close. You nodded, and closed your eyes, submitting to leaning against his lithe frame, your head tucked into the crook between his chin and chest, relaxing against the harsh and bitter winds of the sea, feeling Halfdan’s warmth radiate between you, his cloak and the blankets you felt him pull across both your bodies. 

 

* * *

 

 

You awoke to some frantic shouting. Through the night you had been blown of course and the fleet of ships were separated. Halfdan had left his spot next to you, but his coat was still wrapped around you. You squinted against the sun, spotting him next to his brother as others kept a lookout for the other boats, your father’s boat. When Halfdan noticed you were awake, he made his way back over to you, holding his hand out to help you up. You took it, wrapping his coat around his body as you stood, somewhat smugly smiling at him when he raised an eyebrow at you. He didn’t say anything, just walking you over to Harald. His brother raised an eyebrow at you, noticing the familiar furs but didn’t say anything about it. 

“We’ve been separated. Hopefully we can find them soon.” You heard Harald say. “We wouldn’t want to face Paris with any less men than we need to.” You stood on the edge of the boat, holding onto a rope as you peered over the empty seas, searching across the horizon. Halfdan stood below you, smiling up at you when you glanced down at him.

“You’re looking for you parents ships?” He asked, although it didn’t feel like a question to you. 

“Of course I am. I need to know that they are both safe. And that Björn is safe.“

You spotted your mother’s ship first, waving at her from where you stood. She waved back, and you both spotted your father’s ship as you entered the mouth of the river. As you sailed up river and approached land, you noticed ships docked on the riverbank. Frankish scout ships. You disembarked the boats alongside Halfdan, Floki and King Harald, your axe gripped in your hands as you crept into the trees and the undergrowth, searching for Frankish troops.

You watched Floki’s back as Halfdan crept behind a pissing Frank, sticking his boot beneath him and under the stream of piss. You stifled a smile at the look of terror on his face when as Halfdan began shushing him before clamping a hand over his mouth and holding his axe to the man’s throat. 

King Harald wordlessly gestured with his sword to the rest of his men, before he lead them forward, with Floki and you bringing up the rear of marching men.

The battle was almost over from the beginning. The Frankish scouts were caught off guard and were slaughtered with barely a fight. As the others made camp and the few that were injured were treated, you followed behind Harald and Halfdan, sitting with them, smiling with Halfdan over the fear on the Frankish men’s faces, especially the one that Halfdan had snuck up on. You and the brothers followed Björn and your father up to a ridge when you heard Björn call your fathers name, spotting signal fires being lit. 

"News of our arrival will soon reach Paris." You saw Haralds face drop, before he gestured to Halfdan and marched them over to the Frankish prisoners that were sitting down, tied up.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking them for a walk!” Harald laughed.

Harald dragged the leftover prisoners over to the signal fires along with his brothers, and you and Floki followed, laughing and smiling while watching as Halfdan jeered and shouted at them, picking them up off the ground and shoving them, pushing them around like he was having the time of the life bullying the men. You helped Harald's men tie the Christians to their makeshift pyre, grinning as Harald and Halfdan began to loudly cheer. Floki climbed the tower propping up the signal fire, lighting a few torches and dropping the flaming sticks down to the base of kindling that Halfdan had began piling underneath the feet of the Frankish soldiers. Many of them began screaming and pleading in their native tongue.

“What do you think they’re saying?” Halfdan asked his brother, patting his shoulder eagerly. It was very different watching Halfdan so enthusiastic in the face of practically torturing these soldiers, a sharp contrast to the soft, dark horse persona that he exuded back in Kattegat.

“I think they want you to put out the fire! Help them brother! Help them!”

“I will try, i will try.” It amused you greatly, when Halfdan began pissing onto the screaming Franks, laughing as they begged in their language and screamed in pain as the fire began to engulf their bodies, flames licking up their legs and their clothes catching on fire.

“So now we’ve sent another signal to Paris. A signal from the gods, do you think they can see it, do you think they can understand it!” It set a fire in you, to  see Halfdan clutching onto his brother, his usually quiet voice loud as he shouted and screamed with enthusiasm while his brother turned to his men and began crowing in delight. He jumped and had the biggest smile you’d ever seen on his face when he was laughing, going back and forth between you and Floki and his brother, arms wrapping around all the men with him, including yourself. He almost bowled you over in surprise as he cheered in your ear, slightly deafening you.

As you glanced back to the camp, you could barely make out Björn and a few others watching the bonfire erupt. You shrugged and turned your attention back to the flames. Floki clapped a hand on your shoulder and smiled at you, you grinned back widely, pressing your forehead to his own. You spent a good amount of time watching the fire and the Franks burn, with Haralds men still cheering even though the glamour of the burning had died down slightly. Halfdan still had a maniacal look on his face, wildly staring into the fire and the flames, flickering back into his eyes. The look in his eyes made you all the more interested in him. It took until the fire had died down almost completely to shimmery embers before you all made your way back to the camp, smiling alongside them as the brothers and Floki linked arms with you and the four of you eagerly belted out the song, marching back into the temporary camp you’d made.

 

* * *

 

 

The ships had soon found their way to the river, and you had regrouped once more on the ships, this time Björn had dragged you onto his father's ship and sighed, eyes locked on you in disgust.

“Why are you so close with King Harald and his brother, especially his brother?” He asked, shoving your chest with both hands. “Huh?” He growled. “He wants to overthrow our father.”

“I'm making friends.” You pushed him away from you, frowning at him. “Can't you leave me to make friends, I barely have any. I'm not a baby Björn, I don't need looking after. ” 

“I am your older brother and I will tell you what to do.” He growled at you. "And I don't want you getting so close to men like that."

You shook your head and turned away from him as you sailed further down the river, arms crossed over your chest. You felt petty for ignoring him when you knew very well he cared because he was your brother. Your eyes scanned the riverbank, grabbing your brother’s arm when you spotted you uncle on the shore, on a horse, watching your ships, dressed like a damn Frank. Björn instructed your ships to turn and to make camp on the shore before the forts. 

After camp had been set up and your ships were securely docked, your father called a council with you, Björn, your mother, Floki, King Harald and Halfdan. King Harald began with questioning Rollo’s involvement and betrayal, pointing out most the things you were think. You couldn’t help but agree with him, it was the third time your father was betrayed by Rollo and he should have been killed a long time ago, now it was coming to bite all of you in the arse because he was now standing in the way of everything your father was trying to achieve.

"What are you saying?" Your father sounded so tired, the obvious stress of Rollo's involvement with the Franks was already there.

“That he stands between us and Paris. So what do you suggest we do.”

“I suggest we do the obvious. We try and sail straight past the fort up river. But we protect our heads as we force our way through.” Your father said, picking two cups from the table and placing them in the dirt, gesturing through the centre of them.

“Isn't that what your brother would be expecting us to do?” Halfdan asked.

“Yes but he won't be expecting us to attack by land also. In unison with the boats we will send a small party to the nearest fort by foot,they will engage the archers, diverting their attention away from the boats. Yes?” You trusted your father's idea, knowing that he'd take into account Rollo's method of battle. Knowledge was key in the situation and if anyone knew your uncle, it was your father.

“I agree the boats have more chance without the archers hindrance.” Lagertha chimed in. You shot your mother a smile. 

"Those on foot could possibly take a fort?" You suggested. "Then we would have an advantage in pushing past." Your father raised a hand to you, pointing at you and nodding. You sighed in relief, that you didn't just get brushed off.

“Any objections?” Björn glanced across at everyone, and the warriors that gathered around to listen in to the plans.

“I'll lead the party by foot.” Lagertha stated. You shifted your gaze to your mother, opening your mouth to say something before Björn interrupted.

“Then it is agreed we attack tomorrow.” Those listening cheered.

“At least, let ours be the first boat through.” King Harald offered, smiling when your father agreed. As they turned to head back to Harald's side of the tent, you got up and jogged to catch up with them, slinging your arm around Halfdan's shoulder. You shot a glance over your shoulder to Björn, trying to give him a smile which faded quickly when you caught his frown. Halfdan slung his arm around your shoulder as the three of you walked away, looking like he wanted to ask why Björn was glaring daggers into the backs of both he and his brother.

 

* * *

 

 

The next morning came too fast. As you stood at Halfdan's left you heard King Harald mutter, “I live for this.” towards his brother. And Halfdan responding in the same affectionate tone. “The only reason to be alive.” They sounded so ready for this, ready for a fight, ready to die, for Valhalla. You stared at them from the corner of your eye, in awe and wonder. They really did look like the warriors from the stories that were told during the feasts, and you were sure that those stories would only be backed up when you'd get to see them fight.

“The space between life and death, that's where we are most alive.” Floki chimed in with a smile from behind you. You, Harald and Halfdan turned to look at him.

Halfdan handed you a shield from their boat before taking one for himself, smiling to you as the ships approached the forts. The ships began gaining speed while Harald yelled, ordering them to row harder. You watched the archers on the forts change position, turning away from your approaching ships, possibly because of the assault that your mother was leading. You raised your shield with King Harald's orders, locking your shield against Halfdan’s as the archers began to rain arrows onto you. The reality of the battle had finally set in as you heard Halfdan and Harald grunting beside you and the sounds of arrows thudding into the men and shield maidens at your side began to reach your eyes. You peered through the gaps between the shields, eyes searching for a reprieve from the archers, only to have to pull your head back and close the gap as another arrow headed your way and thudded into your shield. You could hear Halfdan breathing next to you, his eyes aimed upwards. He and Harald laughed as they moved their shields like a well oiled machine, peeking through their shields, as you began to come up to the forts, already beginning to pass them.

The chain that rose from the water between the forts caught all of you by surprise. It crashed into the stern of the ship, tipping it aside as Harald yelled for the ships to try and turn. You were plunged into the icy water, swallowing a mouthful when you went under. As you opened your eyes into the murky green you saw people and weapons beginning to sink into the murk in front of you. You resurfaced and gasped, spitting water as you searched for Floki or Harald or Halfdan as the Franks began lighting whatever they could on fire, throwing oil onto the ships and into the water and shooting swimming Vikings like they were sitting ducks. You swam towards your father's boat desperately, calling out for Björn or your father for help. Björn caught your eye and leaned over the edge to drag you on board by your your hand. You sputtered and coughed, choking on the foulness from the oil and water from the river. 

You felt a hand on your shoulder and as you turned your head, you saw Björn squatting down in front of you, worried. “You're okay.” He said to you patting your cheek, searching your face. “You're okay.” He assured to you. 

You shuffled out of the way of the rest of your father’s men that were being pulled onto the boat, trying to catch your breath and get the feeling of oil that was thrown into the water off of your face and skin. Harald and Halfdan shuffled over to you after a while, you didn’t even notice them on the boat. The younger brother searching your body for any signs of wounds or blood. “Bragi are you alright? No injuries?”

“No no I am fine.” You waved him away slightly, ignoring Floki and Björns questioning eyes on you. “Camp. We must return to camp Halfdan.” You scrambled to stand to grab a shield as Björn began to help row away, you held it over your brother, your other hand on his shoulder, as the last remaining fleet of arrows picked off the last few men and women in the water.


	8. Chapter 8

The return to your camp was almost as heartbreaking as the sight of Rollo on the shores. You lacked any sort of hope as you sprinted towards the burning and smoking wreckage, yelling your siblings names, screaming as you searched among the dead bodies. Halfdan was next to you, looking at the bodies that lay on the ground. He found Helga, yelling for Floki. You heard Hvitserk's voice and you scrambled towards your father, seeing him embracing your little brothers brothers. You wrapped them both into your arms, eyes wet as you stared down at them, before Björn and Torvi ushered them away from the wreckage.

You found yourself in the brothers company once again after burning your dead. Stressed without reason and you still felt unnaturally cold despite being removed from the water. You shivered, moving closer to the fire that Harald had lit when you’d entered, you’d stripped out of your wet clothes as soon as you could, lucky you brought along a single set of clean clothes as a spare. Halfdan had handed you a blanket from his own tent, ruffling your unbraided hair, laughing as it fell as a fringe over your face, threading his fingers through it.

“And you are sure you do not want to be with your family.” King Harald asked you, scrubbing his face on a spare rag before tossing it towards Halfdan when he sat back down.

“My father is… occupied with his slave and my brother has too much on his mind, that he won't tell me.” You shrugged and pushed your unruly hair out of your face, forcing a smile, starting to braid it back again. “Besides, my other brothers are more important right now, Björn is with them.”

“You are always welcome here with us. My brother and I mostly appreciate the company of ourselves.” Halfdan offered, smiling up at you from the stool he propped himself up on. You shivered again, dropping to the ground to place your hands almost directly in front of the fire.

“Are you still cold?” Halfdan asked, grabbing his cloak again, bringing it over to you to drape it across your shoulders.

“I’m too cold, I don’t know why.” You rubbed your hands together, and then your shoulders, before you lifted your eyes to meet Harald's first, and then Halfdan's. “Thank you, for taking care of me.”

“We look at you.” Harald paused. “And we see something in you, something worthwhile in you.” He locked eyes with his brother before smiling. “And it seems my brother likes you?” You turned your head to see Halfdan smiling, cheeks tinged red.

“We are two halves of the same soul, you and I.” Halfdan said softly as you both stood. “You should be with us, fighting with those who see your worth.”

“Do not make me choose between my family and you. Please.” You shook your head, pulling Halfdan’s cloak tighter around you. “I love. I love my father and my brothers. I know that this failure can only spark new opportunities.” You locked eyes with Halfdan. “And you are my new friends, who see me as more than just a son of Ragnar. Please. Do not make me choose.”

Halfdan nodded and stepped closer to you, pressing his forehead against yours. Your eyes dropped from his to his lips and quickly before you hoped he or Harald noticed you raised them to his eyes again and gave him an appreciative murmur. He gave you a smirk, leaning in ever so slightly before pulling away and patting your shoulder.

“Now back in front of the fire with you. We don’t want you ill.” Halfdan ushered you back to the fired. “Sit, sit.”  He pushed you down by your shoulders and smiled at you.

 

* * *

 

  


The next morning brought you back onto the boats. You struggled to pay attention, listening to Harald and Halfdan question your father's decision to retreat as you stood next to him. Leaning against the mast you kept your eyes trained on your boots as Lagertha snapped back at Harald. You felt mostly conflicted by how the brothers treated you. The attention from them. The lack of attention from your family now that Björn was practically leading the army in your father’s place. And the retreat invited more conflict to confuse you.

Floki was watching you, quietly, trying to figure out what was keeping you so distracted as you ended up sat next to Halfdan on the boats, suffering quietly to yourself with your indecisiveness. You questioned the way the brothers made you feel. The way affection from Halfdan had left your cheeks red and you blood pumping. You were so confused by how you felt. Halfdan was different. He was so different and yet he was everything you thought of in a friend and ally and as something more. He was kind, he challenged your mind and your wit, he smiled at you like you you held all the secrets in the world in your mind. You tilted your head and smiled at him, even though he wasn’t looking at you.

Your father called the boats to stop and for you to set camp on the cliffside.

“Why would we camp here?”

“Just do it.” You heard your father snap at Björn.

“Sound the horns we are to camp here!” Björn yelled. You heard the horns bellow and you sat up, just as Lagertha and the other scrambled to stand.

“What are we doing here?” She asked.

“Yes. We also want to know. What is the point of making camp here?”

“When we ought to be continuing down river. When we came up we saw a few sizeable settlements. They were ripe for attacking.” Haldan exclaimed.

“At least we wouldn't go home empty handed.”

As they continued to argue with your father, you shook your head and backed up to stand with Björn, before he began to explain his plan.

“We are going to lift the boats up the cliff, then we are going to carry them across the mountains, past the forts and slide them back into the river. Upstream.”

“Carry them? Up there?”

“Yes, up there. You can do that can't you Floki? Or am I wrong?”

“No I can do it Ragnar. I can do it for you. Everything I do Ragnar is for you.” Floki said.

“Let's empty the boats.” Your father ordered. You nodded, and went to work, with helping the others empty your boat.

 

* * *

 

 

Björn gave you an incredible dressing down about family and how it was important that you had to support Ragnar, that it was dangerous to become friends with King Harald when he was incredibly ambitious, that is ambition could probably get you killed. As a peace offering you promised to help with bracing the ropes next to him and your father. After you emptied the boats, and Floki had constructed a pulley system to raise the the boats up the cliff side. Halfdan and Harald approached your father, Harald claiming that they felt stupid and they were happy to be by your side, Halfdan giving you a quick glance as he said so. You kept tight grip on the rope as the Halfdan came over to offer to help you, smiling as you looked behind to glance back at him. He gave you a nudge and picked up the rope behind you to help. You did not know what to do but to continue pulling, as your fingers curled against the pull of the ropes. You were well aware of Halfdan behind you with eveyr pull, leaning back into him each time, you could feel his eyes staring into your back.

After every break, Helga helped however way she could while she was recovering, she and Floki had prepared a paste to sooth the ache from rope burn, she massaged the paste into your rope burnt hands, entrusting Halfdan, who'd accompanied you, with a small container of paste to carry, when your father instructed you to collect some of your things and bring them with you as you began to push the boats over the mountains, on a road of logs. You partnered with Halfdan as you pushed and pulled the boats over the mountains. the older man across from you, ropes gripped tight in his hands as he heaved glancing up at you periodically to give you a wide and charming grin as you spoke to one another. Stepping back over the terrain as you both joked with each other, it kept the mood light despite the hard work and the sweat that broke on your forehead.

Despite all of the progress you were making with the boats and the excitement that came with it. You were happy to be released from duty to go hunting and raiding with with Halfdan and Harald for supplies. You approached a Frankish farm gingerly, wanting not to alert them as you crept forward, but to your dismay it was already empty. The barn still had all its animals, you grimaced when Halfdan ate a raw egg in front of you before offering one to you. You shook your head, gagging slightly as he ate another one, before watching him as he gathered more eggs and brought them with him, balanced in his fingers as you both approached Harald, laughing when Halfdan threw them at his brothers chest, egging him.

“Eggs?” He asked with a laugh. Harald, looked down at the eggshells stuck to his chest before he brushed them off and stalked over to his brother.

“There are women here.” Harald leaned in to say to Halfdan's ear. He turned around back to the barn, looking at it curiously, before gesturing to his brother, nodding towards it.

They stabbed their swords into the hay, looking for the family that was living in the house. When that came up with nothing, Halfdan glanced up to the roof curiously, peering through the slats of wood before grinning and patting Harald's shoulder for attention. He gestured up, and then Harald gestured an order over to one of his men, who knocked one of the supports, causing two young girls to fall from the roof as it collapsed onto the hay.

You looked at the young girls who fell from the ceiling, feeling pity for them. Harald offered one of the girls to you but you declined, more distracted by the heat behind Halfdan’s eyes as he stared down at what must have been the younger of the two girls, a pretty blonde. He stroked his hand over her cheek, caressing her jaw with the back of his fingers before he stared up at you. You felt your stomach knot with heat as Halfdan smiled like a maniac through the the whole process of slaughtering the family after he, Harald and the rest of his men took their turns with the women and tortured them. You lingered behind as Halfdan and Harald began singing. Your eyes strayed to the back of his head as you made your way back to camp, a searing heat settling low in the pit of your stomach. That dark horse, chaotic persona that he had proved himself to be was an infatuating fact, and the grin that was plastered on his face as he sang with his brother made your blood burn with excitement.

This time Björn had set your a tent between both his and Harald’s side of the camp, a peacemaking gesture that slipped a soft smile onto your face. You stripped out of your armour and after washing the blood off of you and out of your hair, and you braided your hair back you laid in your bed, eyes half closed as they stared up at the ceiling of your tent, you thought about the Frankish family, and the look you saw on Halfdan’s face as he killed them. Your stomach clenched and twisted when your remembered the look he had. You wondered how he would look like, with that passion thrown against something else. You ignored the warmth in your stomach as you took a deep breath, tempted to deal with the issue before you took a nap. You heard shuffling outside before the flaps to your tent were pushed open and Halfdan ducked inside, eyes trained on you with a mirthful smile.

“And why are you not out here with us, feasting on the generous meal that the framers provided us.” You turned your head to look at him, raising an eyebrow as he dropped the flap behind him, still in the doorway.

“I don't know know if I could stomach food right now Halfdan." You sighed, the heat in the pit of your stomach was still simmering. "Besides, before we have to continue pushing the boats in the morning, laying in bed and relaxing is a lot more comfortable." You stretched your arms over your head, showing your comfort in your bed.

“Are you alright Bragi?” He moved into your tent, ducking down to sit on the edge of your bed. He almost looked worried about you. "What is it? Are you ill? Did you not warm up properly before we left camp?"

"No Halfdan I'm not ill. I'm just enjoying... Freedom." You admitted softly. "I'm young, this is all new, travelling raiding, all that is normal, but learning about what I feel, how I feel. It's freeing." You sat up to look at him. "Do you know what I mean? All these new feelings, that comes with finding new things? Meeting new people?"

Halfdan leaned forward, shifting onto his knees. “I understand those feelings Bragi, but isn't it a good thing? All these new feelings?” He placed a hand on your shoulders, searching your eyes.

You couldn't help but chuckle at that. "All these feelings keep pointing to one thing. And I think it's a good thing, even while we're doing something amazing as this." Before Halfdan could respond you yanked Halfdan close, tipping him onto you, pressing your lips onto his. It felt nothing like you expected, your free hand tangling in his hair as you clutched the back of his head, your teeth knocking against his in your clumsy attempt at a kiss, unsure as your other hand trembled against the side of his face. His moustache scratched against your own as you moved your lips. He didn’t move, hands still on your shoulders as you kissed him. You pulled away for a moment, breathing unsteady and your composure shattered, searching his eyes for a response, worried when you when he didn't say anything, like he was catching his breath. "Halfdan?" 

Your hands trembled when he moved, he grabbed them lifting them to his face, guiding them. His voice was gentle as he began to murmur to you in your language, something sweet and calming, like he was approaching a frightened child or animal. He leaned in and ghosted his lips over yours. “Let me show you how.” He kissed you again, just as rough as you did earlier, his hands cupping your cheeks as he arranged yours to do he same, he tilted his head slightly, his moustache tickling the underside of your nose. He urged you to lay back and he slid himself on top of you, legs straddling your waist as he pulled away for only a second to look into your eyes, his own brown ones twinkling before ducking back down to kiss you deeply and with an overwhelming passion, he pushed his lips against yours, pinning you down against your bed and he let his hands wander, squeezing over your chest and scratching his nails against the fabric of your tunic, you could feel it through the cloth. His tongue traced the seam of your lips, slipping into your mouth to tease you as he curled his fingers to scratch them down your side.

You whined when he pulled away from you, hands stilling on his chest as he began to move his hips deliberately “I will admit, Bragi Lothbrok,” He said between breathless gasps as he felt your hips jump against his. He cupped your cheeks to look you in the eyes, as intensely as he always was. “That from the moment we spoke in your father's Hall, and you invited me to stay the night, I wanted to drag you to my bed and never let you leave." He chuckled when you made a noise, grinding his hips against yours. "I'm glad that you like that idea too." He teased as he ground his hips against yours. You gasped as he leaned in to nip at your bottom lip, hips jerking underneath the steady rhythm that Halfdan adopted to rolling his hips against yours. He smiled at that, hands leaving the sides of your face to grasp your wrists and pin them above your head, fingers bound to leave a mark on you as they gripped you tightly, holding you still.

“Halfd- Halfdan!” You pushed your hips upwards against him, searching for friction. He giggled at that a sound that you definitely did not expect to come from his mouth, one of his hands slipping from your wrists to trail down your clothed chest, down to the waistband of your pants, his fingers slip beneath them, teasing your shaft and revelling in the sounds that squeaked from your mouth as he moved his hips against yours.

“You're doing so well Bragi, I can only imagine how you would feel.” He murmured, leaning in to nose against your cheek, taking in your wide unfocused eyes, cheeks red and warm, mouth parted. He teased with his fingers and hand, rubbing and teasing and squeezing you to illicit more noises from you, his mouth pressed against your cheek as he moaned and gasped into your ear, hips rutting into yours. You couldn’t help but be more excited by the fact that he was enjoying this as much as you, it made you melt somewhat in his hold, arching your back and showing off to him. The more that he teased you with his hands, the tighter that low, simmering heat in your stomach coiled and threatened to burst as you felt yourself twitch in Halfdan's hands, arms still trapped above your head, surely left with some marks with how tightly he was squeezing your wrists. Your eyes fluttered and squeezed shut as your hips began to stutter and jerk, that heat in your stomach as you heard Halfdan moan your name into your ear.

 

Halfdan chuckled, mostly to himself as he released his grip on your hands and lowered his free hands to your hips, slipping his messy hand out of your pants the nudge his pants down his thighs. You shoved your own lower, meeting his eyes as he fisted his own shaft, looking down at you. “May I?” He asked, starting a slow rut of his hips against yours, he leaned in close to mouth at your jaw, and kissing your lips, swallowing a soft moan. You nodded against him when he broke the kiss. He rutted against you faster than before, teasing himself you listened to him as he moaned and gasped, praising how good you were, his own hips losing their rhythm and search for desperate release. He groaned as his hips jerked to a stop, eyes squeezed shut as his body relaxed slightly, his chest pressing against yours. You let out the breath you were hearing, the steady throb of Halfdan against you as he began to cum was dirty and everything you thought you ever wanted.

“That was good.” He said, he reached up to stroke your the hair that was stuck to the side of your head with his clean hand. You slung your arms around him, peering over his shoulder to see the faint start of bruising on your wrists, you rubbed them, before dropping your hands to your sides, chest rising under Halfdan's weight.

You lifted your eyes to meet his now open ones, cheeks red, now flustered at the state you were in, a mess in your pants and on Haldan's hands as he laid on top of you. "It was good?" You sounded nervous, woefully nervous and when he tilted his head down at you, you know he could tell. He moved his hand from your hair down to your cheek.

“You're flustered.” He pointed out, searching your expression. “Was… Was that your first time?” He asked, testing the waters. His eyes lit up when you nervously nodded.

“With a man.” You admitted and he seemed unbothered by the mess that was between the both of you as he leaned in to kiss you once more. “Then I'm truly truly a lucky lucky man indeed” He murmured, holding your gaze. You felt so shy all of a sudden, looking away from Halfdan's eyes, as if they were searching into your soul. He huffed playfully and rolled away from you for a moment, you turned your head to watch him search for a spare rag or cloth to clean himself up and wipe his hands, before he tossed it to you to do the same.

“Come. Eat something.” He said once he adjusted his pants, and patted and smoothed his tunic and hair. “You'll need your strength.” He smiled, holding his hand out. “Especially if we want to do that again, properly.” You reached up and grasped it, knees wobbling slightly as you stood. Halfdan gave you a teasing smile before leading you out of the tent, back towards the his men and his brother. He patted your shoulder and sat you down near the fire, before reaching over and grabbing the pig roasting above it and with his knife, slicing off a few strips of the meat on its belly to give to you.

“Good to see you join us, Bragi.” Harald smiled at you from where he sat. “We thought maybe we had offended you with how easily we slaughtered the Franks earlier.”

“No no you didn't,  I was feeling slightly.. ill” Your hesitation didn't go unnoticed but you hoped that they took it as a sign of you unwilling to admit weakness, rather the implication of you and Halfdan doing anything else in your tent, you quickly glanced down at yourself to see if anything was out of order but nothing looked suspicious.

You sat with the brothers, eating the roasted pork as Harald began to tell another story about his princess. The sun began to set and the forest became darker. You retreated back towards your tent, alone once dinner was over and most of Harald's men retreated back into their tents. You lay in your bed, more relaxed, the heat that was coiled in your stomach now replaced with a soothing warmth, as you drifted off peacefully, Halfdan’s voice echoing in your ear.


	9. Chapter 9

The next morning you were pulling the boats alongside Björn, as he looked distracted. You gave your brother a look of concern as he glanced up at you and he smiled, shaking you off. “Are you okay, Björn?” You asked between grunts, pulling the on the ropes. In all honesty, you worried a lot about your brother. This entire raid he had been in charge of all your father's warriors while Ragnar suffered from withdrawal from whatever it was that Yidu gave him. The way she looked at your father like he was some kind of a mad man irritated you to no end. Björn was shouldered with all the responsibilities, all the anger from both Ragnar and Harald's men, Björn was left to deal with all of that on his own, and you hadn't really done much to help him.

“I'm fine Bragi, I'm thinking is all.”

“If you need to talk about anything, you know I will listen. You are still my brother.” You offered. "We will always be brothers." Björn's smile grew and yours matched the one on his face. He reached over to pat your shoulder, before you both went back to idly chatting and pulling the boats, grunting under the weight. 

A few hours later, once you'd moved four more boats down the log road, Harald and Halfdan came up to the both of you.“Björn Ironside! Come with us!” King Harald called out to your brother. Halfdan stood behind him quietly but gestured to you to do the same; follow them.

Your brother dropped his rope and made his way over to the brothers, following them as they led you both and whoever else was curious up the mountains, and the then view you saw was glorious. The sight of an unguarded river, winding up to your father's dream. Paris. As you stood overlooking the rest of the river to Paris, Halfdan clapped your shoulder and leaned in to whisper in your ear, congratulating your father and his ingenuity before he pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. The other men and women began singing loudly and cheering. 

The camp that night was quiet. Everyone had drunk their fair share and had settled down, the excitement from earlier had simmered and you had retreated to your own tent, eyes staring up at the awnings unfocused from the amount of drinks you had.

Your tent flaps were lifted and Halfdan came in, smiling at your unfocused expression. You sat up as he stepped closer, stripping out of his clothes. Your eyes didn’t know where to look until he was directly in front of you, crawling into your bed, hands working quickly to bare you to him. He traced the tattoo you had across your chest, fingers pinching and nails pressing against your nipples, laughing as you practically tried to buck him off you from the surprise.

“Hey, hey…” He soothed, repeating the motion gently, coaxing a moan from your mouth. You clutched onto his biceps, as he dropped his mouth to your chest, grazing teeth and tongue over your skin, biting and nipping at your flesh. It drove you crazy, as he teased you like that, showing you new sensations when he sucked a bruise onto your ribs, or bit the flesh above your nipple and smiled at the marks that formed on you. He moved lower and lower until he slid between your legs, eyes lifting to meet yours.

“Are you sure?” He rasped, but it was gentle question all the same. 

“You know I am Halfdan.” You spread your legs to him, raising your hips as he leaned forward and pushed his fingers into your mouth. Your tongue laved over them eagerly, coating them with your spit, eyes trained directly on Halfdan as he watched you, his own eyes dark with lust. When he’d finally pulled his hand away it was coated. He brought it down to your arse, free hand spreading your cheeks with a small gasp from him that you barely caught. You threw your head back as he pushed a finger in, crooking it and slowly beginning to pump his hand. It wasn’t long before he pushed a second one in, biting and kissing the inside of your thighs as you whined and gasped for more.

He smiled down at you, hands spreading and gripping your arse before he pushed into you, stretching you as he doubled over, leaning his weight against you. “By the gods, Bragi.” He barely managed to get out, hands squeezing your thighs, his nails biting into your skin, blood welling in the crescent shaped cuts. He bottomed out, panting as he looked down at you, your eyes barely open, hands wrapped around his shoulders. He began to thrust into you, slowly at first, searching for a rhythm, before speeding up slightly when your moans got louder.

“Halfdan please!” You begged him, already overwhelmed with pleasure as he dropped his hands to your hips and practically pulled you onto his cock desperately. It made you feel desperate that Halfdan wanted this as much as you did, as he rutted into wildly, while you clutched onto him for dear life as he brutally fucked you, his eyes wild and dark, fingers pressing marks into your skin, leaving a perfect set of bruises. You shouted his name as he dropped his head and bit the base of your neck and throat, teeth gripping onto you, grunting. He let go, eyes trained as the skin around the mark flushed red.

“Mine.” He growled into your ear, pressing his lips to your cheek and jaw. You nodded, mouth parted in an ‘o’ shape as he thrust harder, shoving you up the bed, whole your legs shook and body ached for release. He showed no signs of slowing down as your moans turned into desperate whimpers and pleads. He wrapped an arm underneath your waist and changed the angle he thrusted into you, hitting something inside you that made you scream, causing your hips to jerk and your body to clench around him as you came across your chest and his.

He grunted and panted against your throat, his other hand firmly planted above your head as he sped up his thrusts, chasing his own release. He rutted and fucked into you brutally, chasing the ache of pleasure that burnt in his veins, 

“ _ Halfdan. _ ” You gasped at the over-stimulation, your cock sliding against his stomach as he pressed his chest to yours, thrusts becoming staggered and harder against you. He groaned, finally coming to a stop, burying himself in you to the hilt as you felt him throb inside you. He pressed his lips to your cheek, moving them across your face to your lips, wrapping you up in a deep kiss that left, your head spinning as he relaxed, one hand coming to grip your cheek.

His chest pressed against yours, you could feel his heart beating against you, a quick, steady beat as he pulled away to catch his breath. He rolled off of you to the side, reaching for his tunic and wiping away your cum from your chest, and his that was beginning to leak out of you. You felt embarrassed when you did that. He smiled at you when you notice, and slid back into bed next to you to cradle your face.

“Was that what you wanted Bragi?” He asked, gently, a stark contrast to the rough fucking he’d just given you.

“Yes.” You blinked a few times and pulled him in for another kiss. “And if you will have me again? I want that more than once, as many times as you can handle.” 

Halfdan chuckled at you, stroking the side of your face and the hair that had fallen out of your braid, pulling you to his chest. “If either of us can still move.” He murmured lowly to you. “Then we’re not done.”

* * *

 

 

You'd finally pulled the first boat down into the river, grinning in excitement alongside King Harald and Halfdan, enthusiasm plain on your face as they cheered, among your excitement you slung an arm around each of the brothers, walking back up towards camp, where everyone was getting prepared to bring your supplies back onto the boat. 

When Torvi held Erlendur's crossbow out in front of her, pointing it at your brother, Halfdan pulled on your arm to get your attention, your head snapped to Björn before you raced towards his side, your hand gripping tightly onto the handle of your axe. You grabbed his arm with your other hand, as he spoke to Torvi, didn't even move to defend himself. You noticed blood, down the side of Torvi's mouth, and Erlendur crept up from behind. It dawned on you what the rat-bastard was forcing Torvi to do. When Torvi turned, taking everyone by surprise and shot Erlendur, Björn shook you off and stepped forward to pull Torvi into an embrace. “You're safe now.” He whispered to her before walking over to his trembling body and placing a ring on the bolt’s shaft. 

You spent the rest of the day preparing, sharpening your axe, moving with the others as they began to prep the boats to sail the rest of the ways upstream, helping them tie the platforms that you built. The brothers clapped you on the back, Halfdan, slipped his arm across your waist as he handed you a shield, one with their markings, nodding a head towards their boat. You crouched with the brothers on their ship, eyes trained on the horizon of the river. Your eyes caught sight of ships and on them, your uncle Rollo.

Harald and Halfdan pulled you and Floki close to them, pressing all your foreheads together.

“Heilir hildar til!” “Til!”

“Heilir hildi frá!” “Frá!”

“Koma þeir heilir hvaðan!” “Hvaðan!”

You chanted with them, gripping onto their shoulders before the first waves of ships arrived. You followed them as the first of the Frankish soldiers boarded your ship, hacking away at their shields and bodies with your axe, cheering as you helped throw dead Franks overboard. You watched as the rest Frankish fleet advanced, an attempt to attack. 

You braced yourself, with your axe lifted against your shoulder. Your hands and face splattered with blood. Shield hefted in front of you as your ship was breached and the boats rocked. You hacked at the Frankish soldiers alongside the brothers, listening to their laughs and cheers as they began to fall, Halfdan playfully shoving his brother before hacking at another soldier. You being distracted caused you to lower your shield, searching for you brother in the crowd among your fathers ship when a bolt hit Halfdan in his shoulder, knocking him backwards and he fell onto his knees. You heard Harald shout as you grabbed your shield and used your free hand to pull Halfdan behind you and onto the boats, hands slipping in the slick blood pouring from Halfdan's shoulder.

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” You said, staring at the bolt, hands wrapped around it. Halfdan laughed and shook his head at you.  “I shouldn’t have dropped my shield.”

“Better me than you, the gods would have your balls if we let you get shot. And your brother would have mine.” He smiled up at you.

“You are delirious Halfdan.” You muttered as the ships began to retreat and you debated yanking the bolt from his shoulder.  

“I am not delirious.” He groaned as he sat up against the ship, flanked by his brother as you worried over him, the foreboding feeling of defeat washed over you. You’d yanked the bolt out of his shoulder once you’d made it a decent way down the river in retreat.

You stitched up Halfdan as the boats began to gain distance, hands trembling as you propped his lean frame up against the boat, your progressed slowed by the sway of the water beneath you. “You have careful hands.” He whispered to you, trying to not catch his brothers attention. “I'd like to have you stitch me up whenever I get shot.” He gave you a charming smile while giggling. “You should come with us, come back to us to Vestfold. Have your freedom.”

“You are delirious from the pain Halfdan clearly.” You insisted with a red face. He just gave you the same smile he had from the night in your tent before you kissed him,

You all had returned to Kattegat in due time, and you bid farewell to Halfdan and Harald when they left Kattegat only a few days later. Your eyes were red rimmed from putting off their departure. You and Halfdan had gone the furthest away that you could without causing suspicion and you sat, draped across each other in a small alcove on Scar Mountain. He begged you to come with him, for more tastes of freedom, to stay with him. He wanted you to follow your heart. You did not want them to go. You asked him if Harald would consider staying longer, to become proper allies with your father and for the sake of Kattegat, but Halfdan shook his head and muttered about Harald's ambitions. Down at the port, Halfdan had cupped your cheek and pressed his forehead to yours until Harald had pulled him, practically dragged him from you, his hands still clinging to you until he had to let go, and he gave you one last smile before climbing onto their ship. You could have sworn that he was still looking back at you. Björn kept an arm around you shoulder, patting your shoulder gently as you stifled a sob, quickly rubbing your eyes, pretending that you weren’t crying. You spent the next few days wishing that you weren't the son of Ragnar Lothbrok and that you made the decision to go with him.


	10. Vestfold-Rogaland

It was your trip to Vestfold that solidified the relationship that you had with Halfdan. You travelled on your own to Vestfold, for the first time, a single ship at the request of your step-mother. She asked you to go on your own, to spy on King Harald in case he heard about your father’s disappearance and was planning to take Kattegat for himself and return when you thought you had enough information, while you'd accepted, you could only think about seeing your friends again. Seeing Halfdan again.

When you arrived, the first thing that caught your attention was the ribcage of a whale, dug into the ground and used as an archway. You gazed in awe at how busy the port was, the whalers ships returning with sharks and whales strung to the sides of them. You spent about thirty minutes just looking around at all the different ships, amazed by everything that was so different from Kattegat. You wandered throughout the town, eyes catching on the the shiny trinkets in the marketplace.

You made your way over to a stall, noting the armrings that they had on display. There was one particular one, a brass with blue gemstones that caught your eye.

“How much?” You asked, running a finger over it.

“25 silver pieces.” You raised an eyebrow at the merchant, weighing your coin pouch with one hand.

“Surely you could give it to me for 15 pieces.” The trader ran his eyes over you, taking note of your coat and clothes.

“I think you can afford 25.” You sighed, debating on whether or not you wanted to spend your money, the armring caught your eye and you knew you wanted it, not for yourself, but for a chance to maybe give to Halfdan if you saw him again, since it reminded you of him. You nodded, taking out the silver pieces from your pouch, ready to hand them over. Before you could, a hand stopped yours and a familiar voice came from your right.

“How about I get that for you?” You turned your face slightly, catching the sight of a familiar fringe, covering your favourite brown eyes. You wished you had the courage to say something, as Halfdan offered to pay for the armring. He dropped silver pieces into the merchants outstretched hand, before picking up the band and handing it to you. You ducked your face slightly, a slight blush on your cheeks.

“I haven’t seen you around before.” Halfdan said as you tucked the armring away.

“I just arrived today.” You pulled your furs tighter around your body. “It is my first time here.”

“Well then,” He smiled at you, as charming as you remembered. “Let me be your guide. My brother is the king of this kingdom, so I can show you everything it has to offer.”

You ducked your gaze and bit back a smile. “I would like that.”

“May I ask your name?”

You lifted your eyes to meet his, smiling. “I’m surprised you don’t remember me.” You chuckled. “Has it really been that long Halfdan?”

“Bragi!” He grabbed you by the shoulders and pulled you into a tight hug. He pulled away to search your face intently. “You’re here. I didn’t know you were coming to visit.

“No one knows Halfdan.” You pressed your forehead to his, your smile and eyes bright. “No one knows I’m here but you.”

“Come with me, we have to tell Harald, we’ll have a feast in your name, celebrating your arrival.” He wrapped an arm around your shoulder and began walking, guiding you along with him. “It’s been a few years, look at you.” He tugged on your hair, which was now in a similar style to Björns, tied back in a loose braid, the sides of your head shaved, although the length of your braid was shorter than your brothers. “You look so different.” He touched the tattoo that you didn’t have when you were in Paris, fingers soft on the side of your face. “This is new.”

“I fell in love with it after you left. I got one of my own.” You admitted, eyes still wandering around the landscape of the town. “This place is beautiful.” Haldan brought you to a stop in front of what you guessed was a Great Hall, Harald’s Great Hall. You let him lead you inside, taking stock of the carvings and bones that adorned the walls and rafters.

“Brother!” You heard Harald call out to Halfdan. “Who have you got with you?”

“Brother, you remember Bragi Lothbrok, Ragnar’s second son?” He said, practically shoving you in front of him. “He’s come to visit us!” Harald paused, eyes falling on you before he threw his arms open, bounding to you.

“Bragi!” He pulled your forehead to his, smiling down at you. “It’s good to see you, you’ve grown! Welcome, to what will be the capital of my kingdom.”

“It’s good to see you again.” You smiled, patting Harald’s back firmly. “Good to see the both of you.” Harald let go and you straightened, grin widely spread across your face. “I’ve been wanting to visit since you left Kattegat after Paris, Björn had to hold me back from jumping in the water and swimming after you.”

“I’m glad that you’ve come to us. You have to let me hold a feast in your honour. To have a Ragnarsson grace our halls with his presence.” You rolled your eyes and playfully shoved Harald.

“You hush, you know I don’t care about fame.” You wrapped one arm around his shoulder and the other around Halfdans. “I just want to spend time with my friends, who I have missed very much these last three years. Hmm? We can have a feast, but it will be a celebration to friendship and nothing more.”

“That, we can do for you.” Harald smiled. “Welcome to our home.”

You only got to spend a few minutes with Harald before he was whisked away by his kingly duties again, not before he gave you and Halfdan a time to attend the feast. Halfdan however was free to walk with you through the town, explaining its history and what everything meant to you. The whole tour itself took about two and a half hours, you lingered in the markets, smelling the cooking whale meat and watched the merchants fiddle with the fat and oil from the whale. It was all so new to you.

The last place Halfdan took you was to, what you could practically call a cabin, tucked away from the centre of town. He opened the door, waiting in the doorway for you to walk in first. You did, taking in the cabin. It had a large double bed covered in blankets and furs, a chest in the corner, and a mesh covering blocked the entrance to what you assumed was Halfdan’s bath. You turned around to look at Halfdan, curious.

“Do you like it?” He sounded nervous, and when you met his eyes you could tell he was.

“It’s nice. It’s cosy. Feels a bit like home.” You commented, walking over to the bed and running your hands over the furs.

“I moved out of Haralds hall after we returned from Paris. I kept dreaming of you coming here.” He confessed, stepping closer to you. “You can stay here if you want.” He said slowly. “With me?”

You chuckled and shyly ducked your head, your cheeks bright red. “You sound like you’re expecting an answer other than yes Halfdan.” You held your arms out to him, gesturing for him to come closer. “Of course I’d stay with you Halfdan.”

He practically barrelled into you, knocking you onto the bed. He pressed kisses to your face, beaming and laughing. “Oh by the gods. By the gods Bragi.” He rolled to the side and off of you, arms outstretched on the furs as he turned his head to look at you. “I’m so happy you are here.”

You returned his beaming grin with one of your own, shuffling yourself further up onto the bed and making yourself comfortable. “The gods seem to highly favour our meetings.”

He turned onto his side and shuffled up to join you. You paused, before taking out the armring that he paid for, shyly passing it to him. “What’s this?”

“I wanted to buy it, because it reminded me of you, and I wanted to give it to you if I saw you, but you bought it for me.” That made Halfdan chuckle, before he held out his arm to you and nodding. You slid the armring up his forearm slowly, savouring the moment, before leaning down to press a kiss to it.

Halfdan tilted his head and relaxed, the tension melting out of his shoulders. “It seems like we’re fated to be together.” He said it like a promise. You crossed your legs on the bed, shrugging off your coat as the fire Halfdan must have left burning all day finally began to warm you through your clothes.

“I’ve missed you Bragi.”

You leaned in and kissed him softly, tears of joy in your eyes. “I’ve missed you for the last three years Halfdan. I’ve missed you so much.” You whispered when you pulled away.

That night at the feast Harald had for you, you sat between him and Halfdan. Harald gave you a toast, boasting of your friendship and your bravery that he remembered from when you had fought in Paris. You rolled your eyes at him, attempting to kick him from underneath the table and feigning ignorance when he stopped in the middle of his speech looking confused. Halfdan realized what you did and chuckled from behind his cup, his other hand warm on your thigh.

“Now if our guest lets me finish embarrassing him.” Harald tipped his drink over your head in retaliation, his laughter bellowing as the splash of ale caught you off guard and you tipped backwards in your chair. You glared up at him from the floor, an eyebrow raised as the rest of the men and women in the Hall broke into laughter.

Halfdan pulled you to your feet from his chair. You met Harald's eyes before grinning almost maniacally, and stepping over to him slowly before leaning your face close to his, and whipping your sopping wet braid in his face. Halfdan laughed, banging his fist on the table.

“Oh you're clever, boy.” Harald laughed while wiping the ale splatter from his face.

“I have, five brothers King Harald. I have done that to all of them.” You teased him, a smile easily slipping onto your face.

“I see you learned some confidence and a sense of humour from your prolonged exposure to Halfdan when we were in Paris.” He sat back down and patted Halfdan's shoulder. “He did that to me when his hair was longer.”

“Halfdan is a good teacher.” You didn't notice your voice drop slightly as you said it, sending a wink to Halfdan. You remembered your first kiss with him, how clumsy you were versus when he kissed you back. “He has taught me, many things, and gave me the courage to be the man I am today.” You took Halfdan's cup from him since you'd knocked yours over when Harald tipped his drink on you, smiling at him playfully. “To Halfdan! A good teacher. An even better friend.” You sat yourself down on Haldan’s lap impulsively. “And to King Harald, both of you were my friends out of good faith. I'd trust you both with my life. Skol!” You drank half the cup before handing it back Halfdan and he drank what was left without a word, smiling at you seated on him.

Being in Vestfold with Harald and Halfdan was so much different from being in Kattegat. You felt more at home with people who weren't your own, you felt love, from Harald and Halfdan, from people you hadn't even met. Being there was so freeing, your lack of responsibilities left you with more time on your hands than you realized, and when you weren't spending it exploring the town and meeting its people, you followed Harald and Halfdan around like a lost puppy.

 

* * *

 

 

A week had passed before Harald and Halfdan invited you on a raid. You were heading into the kingdom of Rogaland, you knew that Harald was still furthering his successes at his attempt to become King of all Norway, so you agreed to come with, but also Halfdan's insistence on you sharing their glory made you smile. You sailed with Harald and Halfdan, a shield with their markings strapped to your back, your axe at your hip. The journey was estimated to take three weeks, or so you were told by Halfdan as you sat next told him, eyes trained on the the storm clouds in the night sky.

“Why is it every time I get on a boat with you.” You began, leaning against him. “The gods will it to rain.”

“Maybe they are blessing your presence?” Halfdan suggested to you as he wrapped are aren't around you. “Or maybe they're trying to make you take your clothes of to give me another opportunity to see you without them.” He teased, revealing in the obvious blush on your cheeks.

“Do you really have to tease me Halfdan.” You shook your head while holding back a chuckle.

“I have to make up for the years I've missed don't I?” He smiled. “And for the time where no one gave you the attention you deserved.”

“I'm here now.” You laid your head on his shoulder. “You can tease me when we're not on a boat with your brother. Where you can't follow through on anything you want to promise me.”

Rogaland was much colder than Kattegat, a stark difference to the warmth that came from Vestfold’s bustling nature. You narrowed your eyes and rubbed your red tinged nose. You pulled your furs around your shoulder and grumbled. Halfdan laughed at you, patting your shoulder as the boats pulled into the port.

King Arnarson had been open but wary, his presence immediate at the ports when you had arrived.

“King Harald.” He greeted, opening his arms wide as you stepped off the boats. “We were not expecting you.”

“I did not think to send a messenger ahead King Arnarson.” Harald said with a smile, opening his arms and embracing the man. “We had a surprise visit from Bragi Lothbrok, I admit, we were distracted.” Harald released the man and turned back to face you and Halfdan, gesturing and motioning for the two of you to come forward. Halfdan clapped your shoulder and you both stepped forward.

“Bragi Lothbrok. I didn’t think I’d ever see you or any of your fathers sons on our shores.” He said in awe. You held your hand out, and took his, shaking it.

“I didn’t think I’d be here either.” You admitted. “But when King Harald offered me the chance to come with him for a visit. I decided why not?”

He chuckled and nodded. “It’s an honour to meet you, at your age such bravery to join your father and your brother Björn in the siege against Paris.”

Harald smiled. “And of course my brother Halfdan.” Halfdan gave the man a grin.

“Please, we shall have a feast for all of you, to celebrate your arrival. Come.” He gestured away from the ports. “Come.”

The feast they held that night for your arrival was grand. You, Harald and Halfdan were invited to sit on King Arnarson’s table, with his wife and his children present. His son looked about your age, maybe three or four years younger, giving the three of you a warm smile, his eyes curious.

“You really are Bragi Lothbrok?” His son asked. You nodded, smiling at him.

“And can I ask your name?” You asked as you lifted a piece of meat to your mouth.

“My name is Erik, my lord.” You chuckled and reached for your drink.

“No need for the formalities Erik, I’m probably only a few years older than you.” You waved your hand. “I’m nothing special, it’s my father with the legacy not me. I’m just a simple man who is loyal to his family and his friends.”

He laughed at that. “But you are the son of Ragnar Lothbrok, he’s the greatest man to have lived.” You rolled your head, cracking your neck.

“But I am not my father, so no matter what I’ve done, my respect should not be equal to his.” You leaned forward. “Despite the blood of the gods running through my veins.” You gave him a smirk and took a drink of a mead.

Later that night you retired to Halfdan’s room, that King Arnarson had given him, grinning at him as you shrugged off your coat and armour. He was already waiting on the bed, sitting crossed legged making grabby hands at you. You made your way to him, smiling wide. He pulled you into his lap by your hips, arranging you the way he wanted before pressing kisses to your throat and chin, leaving marks there. You let out a small laugh when he began trailing them around your throat, making some form of necklace of marks on your skin. You lowered your chin and pulled him away from you, looking him in the eye.

“You’re jealous?” You accused with a smile. Halfdan rolled his eyes with a smile before huffing.

“As if I could ever be jealous of a boy.” He scoffed, before realizing he’d just admitted the very thing you pointed out. “He has too much interest in you.”

“Halfdan.” You cradled his face when he pouted and looked away. “Halfdan.” You cooed at him, nuzzling his cheek. You laughed when he glanced at you with puppy eyes. “Halfdan you don’t need to be jealous I’m not interested in a boy. I have you, why would I want anything else.”

“Because I’m still an old fool.” He muttered. “And I’m much older than you.”

“Halfdan I don’t care about your age, nor do I care about some boy following me like a puppy. I love you, only you.” You murmured, gripping his chin and giving him a quick kiss. “You’re the one who takes care of me.”

“I don’t like him, I don’t like that boy.” He sneered, his voice more of a growl than usual.

“My jealous Halfdan, my perfect Halfdan.” You pressed your forehead to his. “Don’t let him bother you. If it’ll make you feel better, if he approaches me, I’ll turn him down so that he knows.”

“I’d like to warn him with my axe to his throat and a threat to cut off his balls if he thinks of even trying to sleep with you.” You smiled at how bloodthirsty he was, something you realized that he never really liked showing you, even if you weren’t afraid of him.  

“I love you, however you are, bloodthirsty or gentle. I love every part of you.” You murmured to him, stroking the side of his face and the shaved side of his head.

He tilted his head up at you, pressing his nose to your cheek. “And I love you my prince. My kind.” He pressed a kiss to your cheek. “Gentle.” Another one. “Beautiful prince.”

You giggled and tipped him back, smiling down at him. You pushed his fringe out of his face, kissing his lips. “Never get jealous Halfdan. I belong to you.” He wrapped his arms around you and tipped you over, looking at you like you were something special.

“And I belong to you.” He stroked the side of your face before leaning in.

 

* * *

 

 

The next morning, you woke up to Halfdan talking, his head peeking around the door as he held it closed, blocking whoever was outside from view of the bed, and you. You listened, and recognized Harald’s voice from the other side, it sounded like he was almost arguing with his brother about being let into the room. Halfdan glanced back at you when the bed creaked, while you tried to slip out of it. He nodded his head when you dragged on your pants and tunic quickly.

“I can’t find Bragi, he wasn’t in his room.” You heard Harald say to him. Halfdan looked at you, a silent question before you nodded, and he pulled the door wider and let Harald in. Harald glanced at you surprised, not expecting to see you there, obviously.

“Bragi, I didn’t expect you to be here. You weren’t in your room. I was worried.” He clapped a hand on your shoulder, eyes searching your face, before they dropped to the marks on your neck, the marks Halfdan left on you the night before. He turned his head to look at Halfdan, brow furrowing.

“We shared a girl last night.” Halfdan was quick to explain nervously, laughing as he brushed his hair out of his face. “We kicked her out after we were done, Bragi slept here for the night.”

Harald’s face shifted and you saw the tension melt out of his shoulders. “That’s good, I’m glad you had some fun.” He clapped your shoulders. “I wanted to talk to you about King Arnarson. But I think I will let you both get dressed for a day.” Harald smiled. Nodding at the both of you, before leaving the room.

You turned to Halfdan, his face in disbelief before he closed the door behind Harald and locking it, before walking over to you and cupping your cheeks. “We need to be more careful.” He murmured to you, thumbs running over your cheek. “He’ll catch us if we’re not.”

You covered his hands with yours, pressing your forehead to his. “Why can’t we tell him Halfdan? He’s your brother he surely loves you.” You pressed your lips to his. “We won’t have to hide if we tell him.”

“He won’t be kind about Bragi.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead before pulling away, picking up his tunic and armour from the floor. “You’ve heard what he’s said, what our men have said. If they knew.” He shook his head. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“You’ll always protect me Halfdan. I’m not scared of what will happen to me.”

The both of you went looking for Harald when King Arnarson’s son, Erik, approached the both of you, a hand on your shoulder. He jumped when you spun around to face him, hand hovering over your axe.

“Yes Erik?” You gave him a smile. “Did you need us?” You felt Halfdan put a hand on your back, coming up behind you.

“I wanted to know if I could speak to you, alone.” You raised an eyebrow at him, before nodding at Halfdan.

“I’ll only be a few minutes.” He frowned, but moved away anyway, backing up to catch up with the rest of his men.

“What do you need from me, Erik?” You looked down at the boy.

“I wanted to know, if you were spoken for?”  He asked, shuffling his feet. “And if you wanted to…” He trailed off. “Wanted to come to my room tonight.”  You laughed, nodding.

“I’m sorry, but I am spoken for. You patted his shoulder. “But even if I wasn’t, you’re not my type, you’re too young, and I’m not interested Erik. Sorry.” You turned and left, not waiting to see his expression. You caught up to Halfdan, grabbing his shoulder, pressing a subtle kiss to the back of his neck before laughing when he spun around.

“What did the puppy want?” Halfdan asked as you approached Harald, waiting with another group of his men.

“Wanted me to come to his room tonight.” You laughed. “Don’t worry, I turned him down. Told him I was spoken for.”

“You better have.” He met your eyes before smiling. “You’re my treasure, not his.”

“I am no one’s treasure Halfdan, you know that.” You scolded him, punching his shoulder lightly. “If anything, you’re my treasure, since Paris it felt like I’ve won you, while everyone lost something along with my father.”

“You’re such a poet.” He teased you, before you turned your attention back to Harald, who now caught sight of the two of you.

“Bragi, brother.” He smiled

“Sorry for the delay. Erik wanted to speak to me.” You apologized, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “Are we ready?”

“No, not yet.” Harald frowned. “I heard from one of Arnarson’s men that his brother in law is returning with a shipment of gold and silver, a yearly tribute of sorts.” He turned to look at his men. “We will wait until after he departs to begin, take the gold and silver for ourselves.”

 

* * *

 

 

You and Halfdan didn’t mean to kill him, you really didn’t. You couldn't really speak for Halfdan, about whether he wanted to kill Erik or not, but neither of you wanted to jeopardize Harald’s plans. However it seemed inevitable when Erik had stumbled upon you and Halfdan in a dark alleyway, a few days after your arrival. You already turned the boy down, you told him he wasn’t your type, and that you weren’t interested in him, although it seemed to offend him, it occurred to you he may have been a bit of a spoiled brat but you didn’t stick around for a response. When he found you and Halfdan with his hands tucked down the back of your pants. gripping your arse and your hands tangled in his hair, he’d threatened to tell Harald then he spat at you when Halfdan threatened him to keep his mouth shut while you held a knife to his throat. After a few minutes of whispering to him what you would do to him if he told Harald, you let him go.

He began to back away slowly, before turning and running, only to fall to his face when Halfdan’s axe embedded into his back. You turned wide-eyed to look at him, he stood there with a smile plastered on to his face, looking smug and happy with himself.

“Halfdan get your axe, we have to act like we weren’t here.” You pushed him towards Erik’s body as you grabbed both your tunics from the floor. When Halfdan grabbed his axe, grinning when he ripped it out of the kid's back, you tossed his tunic at him, pulling your own on and you both headed in the opposite direction from Erik’s bleeding body.

It only took an hour for someone to find Erik’s body, and you, Harald and Halfdan were called to see King Arnarson. The man looked somber, his gaze shifting between the three of you. “Someone, has killed my son.” He began, standing with his hands clasped in front of him. “I would like to know if either of you, had any knowledge of that?”

You and Halfdan shook your heads, while Harald’s brow furrowed. “Why would you accuse us of such a thing.” He asked, hand hovering underneath his cloak for what you knew was his axe.

“Because my men found this.” He pulled out your armring, the one your father gave you.

“It is Bragi’s, my wife and my men confirmed they saw him wearing it at the feast." You met Halfdan’s eyes, then Harald’s who looked at you with concern.

“With all due respect King Arnarson. I did not kill your son.” You began, clasping your arms behind your back. “I spoke to him was only a few days ago, where he approached me with an offer that I was not interested in, and I turned him away. I did speak to your son again tonight but it was only to reaffirm my disinterest. I did not kill him, and Halfdan can vouch for me, I was with him the entire night, in his room. My armring must’ve come off when he grasped my wrist."

“And what did my son offer you?” King Arnarson frowned and narrowed his eyes at you.

You chewed on your bottom lip before speaking plainly. “He wanted to sleep with me.” Both King Arnarson and Harald were shocked at the admission. “I told him I was not interested and I am happily with someone else.”

“And are you happy? With someone else?” You sighed.

“King Arnarson I understand your suspicions but I love, the person I am with. I wouldn’t leave them for your son nor would I kill him over such a thing.”

“I’m sorry for accusing you. We saw the armband, and thought the worst.”

“No I understand, he’s your son. Your family. I would be like that with my younger brothers Ubbe and Sigurd, if I found them dead.” You reached out to place a hand on his shoulder. “We will find who did this to your son.” He handed you your armring and smiled at you.

“Thank you Bragi.” As he turned away from you you met Halfdan’s eyes, nodding slightly to him, and then to Harald.

The three of you were dismissed from King Arnarson’s hall, not speaking to each other. Halfdan’s hand brushed against yours as you walked, just barely grazing your fingers. Harald stopped at his room, gesturing for you both to come in.

“I do not know what you two did but you better have a reason for killing that boy.” He said as he poured himself a cup of ale.

“He threatened us.”

“He threatened you” You and Halfdan said the same time.

“What could he have threatened you with? That you would’ve had you kill him, he’s a boy.” Harald narrowed his eyes at you as he took a drink. “You’re not normally blood thirsty Bragi, or scared of threats.”

“I… I was scared.” You couldn’t meet his eyes. “Not a lot of things scare me Harald, but this time I was.”

“What was it?”

“I can’t… tell you.” You wished you could tell Harald about you and Halfdan, but it wasn’t possible, you didn’t know how he’d react, you didn’t wanna put Halfdan’s relationship with him at risk.

“Bragi.” Harald sounded heartbroken. “It’s okay. But we’ll have to push up our plans, with King Arnarson now on edge.” He changed the subject, turning away from you both. “Get ready, we’ll strike tomorrow night.”

Halfdan had to pull you away from Harald as you tried to approach him. You felt incredibly guilty, you didn’t want to make him feel bad, like you didn’t trust him, but it wasn’t just your life at stake, Halfdan was involved too, you didn’t want to tear him apart from his brother.

 

* * *

 

 

The next night you stood in full armour, your axe at you hip when Halfdan walked into your roo,, eyes on you. “Thank you for taking a fall for me,” He pulled you close.

“You know me, Halfdan.” You met his eyes. “I would never let you.”

“Halfdan we have to tell Harald.” You murmured, eyes watching Halfdan’s face. “If something like this happens again. Harald can’t protect either of one of us if he doesn’t know.”

“Bragi we can’t.” Halfdan took a deep breath. “Harald thinks that we’re friends nothing more, I haven’t even told him I get feelings for men, and I’ve known him all my life. I don’t know what he’ll do, to both of us. I don’t know what he’ll do if he knew about you.” He cupped your cheek, pressing his forehead to yours. “We can’t tell him. Not yet.”

Halfdan pulled away from you abruptly when Harald pushed into your tent. “Halfdan. I didn’t expect you to be here.”  

“I wanted to speak to Bragi before we slaughtered everyone.”

“Seems like we might have had the same idea.” Harald smiled at his brother. “Do you mind if I?” He gestured towards you. “Privately.” Halfdan nodded and left your tent, with a small smile from behind his brothers back.”

‘You want to speak to me Harald?” You smiled at him, tilting your head to the side.

“Whatever it is that you can’t tell me, that you won’t tell me. I promise whatever that boy threatened you and my brother with. You don’t have to be scared.” He placed a hand on your shoulder. “You can trust me Bragi. I love you, and my brother. I want to help any way that I can.”

“Harald. It’s not up to me, whether I can tell you.” You frowned, pulling him close to you into a hug. “Everything you could ever give me Harald, can't help us yet, not yet.”

“I’m sorry I can’t help you.” He hugged you tighter. “I’m sorry.”

“No, no Harald, don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault.”

“I try to be good to my people Bragi, I try to be good to you, you are more than important to me, to see you so close with Halfdan, you’re good to my brother, you trusting him, him trusting you, having you here with us is, is the wildest thing the gods have given us. You were a blessing from the gods for us.”

You felt your eyes water slightly and you blinked back the tears. “Harald, you and your brother have given me more than, Björn. Than my family could ever give me, I think you’ve given me a proper home.” You patted his shoulder, pulling away to smile at him. “Now let’s take Rogaland and add it to your kingdom huh?”

He laughed with you, pulling you into the out of the tent with him, grinning wildly. Halfdan spun around, meeting your eyes, noticing how wet they were.

“Bragi? What’s wrong?” You chuckled, pulling Halfdan’s forehead to yours.

“Nothing Halfdan, everything, everything is perfect.” You whispered to him,

“Then we can go.” Halfdan pulled you along with them. Your men, Harald’s men, had gathered in the large courtyard, carrying their weapons and their shields, awaiting Harald’s orders.

“You all know why we are here.” Harald began, his voice only a steady tone. “But now isn’t a time for us to linger or to celebrate. It is time for us to take what is ours.” Halfdan grinned as you raised your axe above your head.

“Hail King Harald.” You shouted. “Hail King Harald.”  You began to chant, raising your hand and axe in the air. Halfdan joined you, lifting his own axe in the air. Harald seemed to smile wider and brighter. The crowd behind you began to chant with you. Harald raised his arms and the crowd went silent.

“Kill them!” He raised his own axe. “Kill them all!”

The slaughter was easy. You took most of the people in Rogaland by surprise, many didn’t fight back, some you spared, others were stubbornly loyal to King Arnarson and you killed them without mercy. Halfdan was laughing with abandon beside you, slamming and hacking at skulls with the blade of his axe, shattering them.

King Arnarson had finally made himself himself known, his eyes wide as he had burst from his home, carrying his own sword and axe. Harald had approached him, his arms wide as he laughed and jeered as Arnarson tried to swing at him with his axe. He was quickly subdued by Haralds men, pushing him to his knees.

“You understand why I’m doing this yes?” Harald looked down at him, holding his axe to the man's throat. “My brother had a hand in killing your son.” He murmured. “And now I will kill you.” He swung his axe, grinning wildly as he sent King Arnarson’s head flying. You and Halfdan charged forward into his house, slamming your feet up the stairs as his wife screamed in fear.

“Which one is Erik’s? Hmm?” You asked her, gesturing to the weapons scattered around what you thought were their beds. She pointed out an axe to you, you picked it up, testing its weight. “It’s a perfect gift for my brother, Björn Ironside, you might know him.”

Your victory that night was quickly celebrated and you were informed by Harald that you would be sailing back to Vestfold after a days time. You smiled at him, patting his shoulder before returning to your room, where Halfdan was already waiting. You held each other that night, glad that you were both safe again, uninjured, unharmed. You traced the tattoos on his face curiously.

“I would like another one of these.” You murmured. “They are too beautiful not to have.”

“I’ll bring you to the man who did mine.” Halfdan smiled at you. “It would be beautiful on you.” He slid his hand across your face, thumb brushing over the tattoo you did have. He leaned closer to you, eyes searching your face. “Would it make you mine?”

“I’m already yours.” You traced the tattoos on the side of his head. “But it makes me feel closer to you, when we’re distances apart.”

“We don’t have to be.” He murmured. “Tell me that you’d stay with me. You don’t have to go back, the gods will provide. We can run away together. Go somewhere where no one knows who we are. Have a house, _live_. Be happy with each other” He suggested, fingers threading into your hair, fingers scratching lightly against the side of your head, soothing you.

“Harald would find us.” You smiled softly, something slightly resigned. “We would spend our time being scared of him finding us. He’s your brother, if we disappeared off of the face of the world, he would come for you.”

“It was worth a try.” He smiled and pressed his lips to your forehead.

“Sometimes I think I’m dreaming, and that when I wake up, you will no longer be here.” You whispered, eyes fluttering shut as you pressed your head to Halfdan’s. “I don’t want it to be a dream.”

The next morning, you sat cross-legged in front of Halfdan as he braided beads into your hair, gathering it and looping the strands with deft fingers, sliding beads up the strands and smiling when they almost jingled like bells against each other when he draped them over your shoulder and into your view as you looked down. Halfdan slid his hands around your shoulders when he was done, pressing gentle kisses to the nape of your neck, gently nudging his nose against you. “You look so grown up like this.” He whispered, fingers threading through the small braids and tugging on them slightly. “You look like you’re fit to join the gods. In all their glory.” He tucked his chin onto your shoulder, turning his head to press his lips to your tattooed cheek.

"You compliment me too much." You shifted to the side to face him, sliding your hands across his arms, as they slid down to rest against your chest. He chuckled against you, pressing more kisses to your shoulder. It made your chest warm when Halfdan was so affectionate with you. He was gentle and sweet, sliding his hands over you. You leaned your head back against his shoulder, rolling your head to press a kiss to his jaw and then under his ear. He began softly humming, against you, lips brushing against your ear, swaying slowly against you. His humming slowly lead to singing. He moved on the bed, sliding around to sit on his knees in front of you, sliding his arms underneath yours and leaning forward, pushing you down to lay back on the bed. He looked down at you, the same intense look he always had on his face when he was thinking. 

"I think." He began softly. "That you, need to think more highly of yourself." He whispered to you, hovering over you. He leaned, close enough to brush his lips against yours. "You are, my prince." He lowered his body, sliding himself down so that he was propped up on his elbows above you. "My light. My heart." He pressed his forehead to yours, tangling his legs with yours. You felt your lip tremble as you gave him a crooked smile, running your hands slowly up and down his sides. He smiled down at you, something unguarded and different. He leaned in to whisper in your ear. "I think I might love you?" It sounded like a question, but for some reason you never felt so sure about something anyone has ever said to you.

You pulled him down to you, sliding your hand up to swoop him into a kiss. It wasn't like ones you'd had before, nothing like the bruising kisses or ones where he'd nip your bottom lip to chuckle and tease you. This deep, a give and a take, a promise and an oath. He pulled away to smile down at you. His eyes seemed brighter. "I know I love you." He insisted.

 

* * *

  
  


 

Your return back to Kattegat was somewhat bittersweet. You had set sail a week after returning from Rogaland, realizing how long it had actually been since you’d left Kattegat and arrived at Vestfold. You had the shield Halfdan gave you strapped to your back, new braids and beads in your hair, another tattoo on the other side of you face, courtesy of Halfdan the day before you returned. But you missed the warm furs and the bed you shared with Halfdan, the flickering fire and his soft eyes on you, and his singing at night when you rested your head on his chest. You missed the feeling of freedom that came from being in Vestfold, you missed Halfdan wrapping his arms from behind you and singing to you before you went to bed. You dreaded the weight that your step-mother made you carry, but you were looking forward to seeing Björn again. Seeing Harald and Halfdan act like brothers, made you miss him something fierce.

Björn, your brothers and your step-mother were waiting at the ports when you returned. Björn pulled you into a hug when you stepped off the boat, a soft smile on your face. He clapped his hand on your back.

“Welcome home Bragi.” You clutched him tight as he pulled away from you, fingers touching your new tattoo. “You got another one?” 

You chuckled and nodded. “It was a going away present. From Halfdan. He thought it seemed to fit since I was fascinated with both his and his brothers.” 

“You went to Vestfold?” You forgot that Björn didn’t know where you were. You nodded. “Queen Aslaug asked me to gain information from King Harald and Halfdan.”

“You didn’t tell me.” He almost sounded betrayed. You cupped his cheek, leaning in to press your forehead to his.

“I’m sorry Björn. If I had found you before you left, you know I would have.” 

He stepped back from you and let your other brothers and your step-mother to come forward to give you a hug. You held your step-mother tight, patting her back gently. “They’ve taken Rogaland. Killed King Arnarson and his Earl.” You whispered into her ear. “No plans for Kattegat.”

“Thank you Bragi.” She cupped your cheek and smiled at you. “I’m proud of you.” 

You forced a smile and let out a deep breath. You followed your step-mother and brothers to the Great Hall, sitting at the table and smiling as Sigurd pat your arm and shoulder. You pulled him into your lap before letting him play with the shield Halfdan gave you, rolling it back and forth against the table. Your step-mother had Ivar in a basket, propped next to her. Ubbe and Hvitserk flanked Björn as he sat down. You gave a smile to the slave girl pouring you a drink, thanking her.

“You have one of their shields.” Your step-mother commented.

“Halfdan gave it to me when we returned from Rogaland. I brought it back with me as a token from the raid. Which also reminds me I brought presents back for all of you.” You lifted a small sack that you brought back with you. You took out a small bag made of delicate fabric and passed it across to the table to your step-mother . “Earrings, with rubies, from King Arnarsons wife.” You passed a pair of knives over to Hvitserk and Ubbe. “Taken from his Earl.” You gave Sigurd an armring you brought from the same merchant you met on your first day. You passed a necklace to your step-mother for Ivar, with a hammer fashioned out of a whales bone. “And for Björn,” you handed him an axe, the handle was carved with runes and patterns. “From King Arnarson’s son.” You gave him a smile. “Presents for all of you.”

“You went with them. To invade Rogaland. To help them?” Your step-mother   looked at you in a way that left you feeling, annoyed.

“King Harald and Halfdan invited me. Was I supposed to say no? Besides, they have no fully fledged plans for Kattegat since they still think Ragnar is King, and until they actually prove to have intention to invade us. Wouldn't it be useful to have an alliance and a rapport with them?” You leaned back in your chair, bouncing Sigurd on your knees and stroked his hair.

“You like them too much Bragi.” Björn said before taking a sip. “It could get you killed.”

“Björn.” You took a breath. “I need you to trust me.” You rubbed your thumb across Sigurd’s cheek as you sat forward. “I love our family and I will do anything to protect you and our brothers, our mother. But Harald’s plan to become King of all Norway is just a plan, just his ambitions. He won’t risk overthrowing our father, he can’t fully set whatever plan he has in motion because he doesn’t know that Ragnar is gone.”


	11. Chapter 11

Your return back to Kattegat was somewhat bittersweet. You had set sail a week after returning from Rogaland, realizing how long it had actually been since you’d left Kattegat and arrived at Vestfold. You had the shield Halfdan gave you strapped to your back, new braids and beads in your hair, another tattoo on the other side of you face, courtesy of Halfdan the day before you returned. But you missed the warm furs and the bed you shared with Halfdan, the flickering fire and his soft eyes on you, and his singing at night when you rested your head on his chest. You missed the feeling of freedom that came from being in Vestfold, you missed Halfdan wrapping his arms from behind you and singing to you before you went to bed. You dreaded the weight that your step-mother made you carry, but you were looking forward to seeing Björn again. Seeing Harald and Halfdan act like brothers, made you miss him something fierce.

Björn, your brothers and your step-mother were waiting at the ports when you returned. Björn pulled you into a hug when you stepped off the boat, a soft smile on your face. He clapped his hand on your back.

“Welcome home Bragi.” You clutched him tight as he pulled away from you, fingers touching your new tattoo. “You got another one?”

You chuckled and nodded. “It was a going away present. From Halfdan. He thought it seemed to fit since I was fascinated with both his and his brothers.”

“You went to Vestfold?” You forgot that Björn didn’t know where you were. You nodded. “Queen Aslaug asked me to gain information from King Harald and Halfdan.”

“You didn’t tell me.” He almost sounded betrayed. You cupped his cheek, leaning in to press your forehead to his.

“I’m sorry Björn. If I had found you before you left, you know I would have.”

He stepped back from you and let your other brothers and your step-mother to come forward to give you a hug. You held your step-mother tight, patting her back gently. “They’ve taken Rogaland. Killed King Arnarson and his Earl.” You whispered into her ear. “No plans for Kattegat.

“Thank you Bragi.” She cupped your cheek and smiled at you. “I’m proud of you.”

You forced a smile and let out a deep breath. You followed your step-mother and brothers to the Great Hall, sitting at the table and smiling as Sigurd pat your arm and shoulder. You pulled him into your lap before letting him play with the shield Halfdan gave you, rolling it back and forth against the table. Your step-mother had Ivar in a basket, propped next to her. Ubbe and Hvitserk flanked Björn as he sat down. You gave a smile to the slave girl pouring you a drink, thanking her.

“You have one of their shields.” Your step-mother commented.

“Halfdan gave it to me when we returned from Rogaland. I brought it back with me as a token from the raid. Which also reminds me I brought presents back for all of you.” You lifted a small sack that you brought back with you. You took out a small bag made of delicate fabric and passed it across to the table to your step-mother . “Earrings, with rubies, from King Arnarsons wife.” You passed a pair of knives over to Hvitserk and Ubbe. “Taken from his Earl.” You gave Sigurd an armring you brought from the same merchant you met on your first day. You passed a necklace to your step-mother for Ivar, with a hammer fashioned out of a whales bone. “And for Björn,” you handed him an axe, the handle was carved with runes and patterns. “From King Arnarson’s son.” You gave him a smile. “Presents for all of you.”

“You went with them. To invade Rogaland. To help them?” Your step-mother   looked at you in a way that left you feeling, annoyed.

“King Harald and Halfdan invited me. Was I supposed to say no? Besides, they have no fully fledged plans for Kattegat since they still think Ragnar is King, and until they actually prove to have intention to invade us. Wouldn't it be useful to have an alliance and a rapport with them?” You leaned back in your chair, bouncing Sigurd on your knees and stroked his hair.

“You like them too much Bragi.” Björn said before takinh a sip. “It could get you killed.”

“Björn.” You took a breath. “I need you to trust me.” You rubbed your thumb across Sigurd’s cheek as you sat forward. “I love our family and I will do anything to protect you and our brothers, our mother. But Harald’s plan to become King of all Norway is just a plan, just his ambitions. He won’t risk overthrowing our father, he can’t fully set whatever plan he has in motion because he doesn’t know that Ragnar is gone.”

  
  


* * *

 

You watched as your brothers trained and fought with each other, quietly judging as Sigurd jeered at Ivar as he had always done. You loved your brothers, despite them being far younger than you. You still babied Sigurd, it was no secret that Sigurd was your favourite brother after Björn  and that if anyone hurt him you would have murdered them. In your corner of the cabin, you tapped your foot against the chalk circles in front of you. Sigurd pulled on your arm when Ubbe ducked his head into the cabin. You dropped your runes, biting your bottom lip as you read the runes facing you. Sigurd tugged on your arm again and you swept up the runes on the floor, smudging the chalk circles underneath your foot before heading out the door. When you spotted Björn on his horse, trotting up towards the cabin, you felt the floor drop out completely from under your feet. The runes had to be right.

“You think our father never knew?” Ubbe asked. 

“It is possible. In those early days it was impossible to navigate the sea.”

“He knew, he had to.” Hvitserk said.

“If he did he should have told the people. Everyone lost relatives. Fathers and uncles, sons and daughters.” Sigurd commented as he skinned his rabbit. “They would have demanded revenge.”

“That's why he wouldn't tell them.” Ivar nonchalantly added.

“What do you mean?” Ubbe interjected.

“It was a waste of time. They were dead. Ragnar wanted to sail to Paris, he wanted to be famous.”

“If our father knew he would have a had a reason to keep it from the people, he was a good King up until Paris.” You said firmly, setting down your axe on the table. You sighed as they began to bicker.

“Our father abandoned us. We were just kids and he just ran off. And now we hear he kept this big secret from everyone. That he was not truthful or honest.”

“This makes me feel sick, how could our father not tell the people what happened.”

“Maybe of he told them they would have killed him.” Björn suggested.

“If it's true then I hope he never comes back” Ubbe declared.

“If he ever came back then I would kill him.” Hvitserk added. Björn sighed at that and you threw your cup at Hvitserk.

“He is still your father you wouldn't be here without him.”

“Me too.” Sigurd added.

“Sigurd don’t you say that. Our father loved us.”

“Bragi you say that but you don’t even act like you miss him or care for him. And from what I’ve heard, you spent more time being a bitch to King Harald and his brother whenever they need you to accompany their men somewhere.” Hvitserk sneered at you.

“Bragi is in charge of keeping the alliance and the peace with King Harald and his men, you wouldn’t understand anything like that Hvitserk you don’t understand politics. And screw you. All of you. Our father never did anything wrong. He is our father. That is the end of it.” You nodded with Ivar. “You all sound like a bunch of Christians.” He sneered.

“I loved our father as much as you do.” Ubbe argued.

“Who said I loved him, Ubbe? I said I admired him, he's Viking. And you are soft.”

You sighed and leaned away from the conversation, already feeling wary, sick and tired of it. When your father had left it had caused another rift between the already facturing relationship between your brothers. You were still close to Sigurd, but Ubbe and Hvitserk questioned you and where your loyalties lay. Björn was different, he didn’t hate you and he didn’t argue, but he wanted to explore and to travel and he wouldn’t stay in Kattegat forever, and you didn’t want to either.

“So if he ever came back?”

“I don't think he would ever come back. I think what happened in Paris finally broke him.” Björn interrupted. “You can all say whatever you want but he was a human. People started to talk as if he was a god. He was not a god, he was a man! A man with many dreams and many failings.  I've learned that in the many years he went away, Bragi has too. If I was him, I wouldn't come back.”

“And what would it be if he did. He would come back to ungrateful children and angry people who look at one mistake versus the good he had done for Kattegat.” You spat on the ground. “He was our father and he still is our father. But men make mistakes, it's about time you learned that”

“Despite all his failings, he is still the greatest man in the world to me.” You sighed and slung an arm around Björn’s shoulder, pulling him into your side.

You stayed at the cabin with your brothers as Björn left. You weren’t to worried about Ivar running rampart while your step-mother, Ubbe and Sigurd around. Björn had invited you and Hvitserk to come with him to the Mediterranean, to travel and to explore new lands and seas. Leaving Kattegat was something you had desired for a very long time, but you never left for the possibility of your father returning, it was your debt, to stay loyal to your father until you knew he was dead, and if he needed to be avenged.  

 

* * *

 

 

You did not appreciate it when your father returned. You and your brothers had gone to greet him. You, Ubbe, Hvitserk, Sigurd and Ivar.  

“It appears my return is not welcome. You've all obviously made your mind up about me. I cannot blame you for that so. Well, boys, who's gonna do it then? Who's gonna kill me? Well I don't mind, go ahead, please?”

“What about you Hvitserk, you think you're a man now? I dare you. Put me out of my misery. Do it. Do it. Do it do it do it!” Hvitserk looked afraid of your father almost. His last memory of him being a defeated wreck. Sigurd looked scared, and you shifted over to his side, sliding a hand onto the small on his back.

“Look at these people they no longer support me, and why would they. I am your leader and I just left. What kind of leader does that? What kind of King abandons his people? What kind of father abandons his sons?”

“So who wants to be King. Oh you know how this works. If you want to be King. You must kill me.” Ragnar went around offering his sword to men and women in the crowd, his eyes wide and wild. He asked each of your brothers in turn and stopped on you last. He narrowed his eyes, getting in your face.

“What about you Bragi, you spent so long with that King Harald and his brother. Are you sure you wouldn't want to kill me and give it to them?” He screamed at you slapping you across the face.

You breathed deeply and didn't respond, glaring down at your father.

“Ubbe no.” You said as your brother stepped forward, holding his sword.  Your father approached him across cupped his chin, before pulling him into an embrace, with Ubbe dropping his sword.

 

* * *

 

“It would appear you have another son. His name is Magnus. His mother is Queen Kwenthrith and he lives in King Ecbert’s villa in Wessex.” Björn stated as your father began to laugh. “

“And who told you that?”

“A warrior fighting in Wessex.”

“And he was the one that told you about the settlement?”

Björn nodded. “I know that he may not be your son, mostly because Queen Kwentrith spent her time trying to seduce Bragi but you, sleep with whoever you want.”

“I came back, because I wanted to see what has become of my sons.”

“And?

“And I'm going to England and I wanted to know of you all were going to join me. What do you say, Hvitserk? Ubbe?”

“No.” Ubbe muttered.

“Sigurd, Bragi?” Your father sat back down. ”I can see in your eyes that your answer is also no Björn.”

“I want to see the Mediterranean. Hvitserk and Bragi have agreed to come with me, so has King Harald and his brother.” Your eyes snapped to Björn as he said so. You didn't know that Harald and Halfdan were coming with you, and it had been more than five years since you had seen the brother.

“Of course Bragi is going with you, with those two brothers involved. What about you two, why are you not going with your brother?” Your father asked. You frowned at that, you didn’t think that your father would have been jealous of the rapport you build with Harald and Halfdan.

“You have a problem with my friendship with Harald and Halfdan father?” You asked, tilting your head with your eyes narrowed. Your father seemed to ignore you g

“We want to stay and protect our mother. Kattegat has changed. And we want to protect it, and our family.” You left your brothers behind, following Björn as you left your father behind too.

 

* * *

 

At dinner you ignored your brothers bickering and focused your thoughts on the possibilities in the Mediterranean. The possibilities of you seeing Halfdan again. And after that, you settled away from your family in the Great Hall, stuck in your own thoughts as the slaves cleaned away the empty dishes. You couldn't get the thought out of your head in seeing Halfdan again. You wished and wished and begged the gods for a chance and seeing him again and your brother had delivered their promise of an opportunity to do so. It almost made your heart ache at the thought. 

You followed your brothers into the forest the next morning to supervise them, making sure they didn't recklessly kill each other while training. You rolled your eyes as Sigurd threw his axe and Ivars cup and gasped as his forehead began to bleed, after he dodged Ivar axe. You made your way over to him and sighed,  using your thumbs to push his hair out of his face as you inspected the cut on his face.

“Be careful the both of you. Training doesn't mean killing.” You frowned at Ivar. While you cared for him you know it wasn't entirely an accident.

As you all laid in the sand talking about that Margarethe girl, you frowned at Ivar’s insistence on having her.

“Ivar you don't need to have her because your brothers have. I haven’t had her.”  You smacked Ubbe on his chest. “Find a girl you do love.”

“That is easy for you to say Bragi, everyone knows you met someone when you went to Paris, a lost love. You don’t need her then?” Ivar asked. “Hmm? Bragi?”

“I lost someone I loved and I may never see them again. I’ve made my peace with that.” You shrugged, ignoring your brothers laughs and jeers.

After your brothers had taken Ivar to see that girl, you had taken a break to lay in the grass staring at the trees above you. You thought about Halfdan for years after returning from Vestfold with his beads in your hair, every moment with him seared into the back of your mind and the promises of freedom you felt. Your first time with him was fresh in your mind, when he’d come to your tent that night after kissing you and teasing you. As you laid in the grass, you stared up at the sky, ignoring the sounds of the wildlife and the trees moving in the wind as you pretended that your hands were Halfdans.

You sighed as you returned with your brothers to Kattegat, continuing to listen to then bicker about your father. You refused to participate in the verbal jousting match they set upon each other, set in your commitment to Björn and your commitment to seeing Halfdan and Harald again.

 

* * *

 

 

The day came for you to greet the arriving ships with Björn, as you stood upon the docks almost vibrating with excitement, spitting familiar sails and a crest among shields. The brothers had arrived with Floki, and with them, warmth in your heart and the buzz of excitement in your chest. You barely caught sight of Halfdan hopping off the ship before you were swept away by one of your step-mother’s servants in regards to some of the preparations in the Great Hall. With one last glance over to where you last saw Halfdan. You allowed yourself to be dragged away.

It had taken till the celebrations for you to get back to your brother’s side, greeting guests as they arrived into the Great Hall. First Lagertha, you hugged your mother tight, thanking her for coming. She looked at you proudly before turning her attention to Björn to hug him before she and Astrid disappeared to mingle. Then, when the doors opened and the brothers walked in. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes fell on Halfdan. The blonde looked around nervously like he was trying to spot you in the crowd.

“Halfdan, King Harald.” Björn swooped in to greet them, shaking Harald’s hand.

“Björn Ironside. It has been a long time.” King Harald gave him a smile before spotting you lingering behind Björn. “And is this Bragi? You are a man now. You look so different from when you visited us in Vestfold!.” He gave you a warm smile before he pulled you into a tight, rib-squeezing hug. Halfdan’s attentions turned to you, the smile on his face bursting into a grin.

“Bragi!” He practically yelled into your ear when he dragged you in for a hug. You flinched before patting him on the back, pulling away to meet his eyes. 

“Fancy seeing you here, Björn didn’t tell me you were coming with us until a few days ago, and really, he told Ragnar and I was there.” You laughed when Halfdan shot Björn a look. 

“Ah, hush Bragi.” Your brother chastised. “You would have agreed the moment you heard their names despite of the plan, besides, wasn’t it a nice surprise?” You shot Björn a look, one that threatened possible brotherly violence if he didn’t get to the point. “Fine, come, come in.” Björn gestured for Harald and Halfdan to come inside and embrace the party

“You have not been idle, we have all heard of your exploits.” Björn began to speak as he turned to lead them into the hall.

“Yes.” Harald confirmed as you met Halfdan's eyes and fell into step besides him, your hands brushing against each others.

“That you dragged my brother along with you to Rogaland and overthrew King Arnarson and Earl Eyjolf.” Halfdan raised an eyebrow at you.

“Yes. Bragi was a huge help in Rogaland.” 

“And also King Svein.” Halfdan added. You narrowed your eyes, they must have gone to overthrow King Svein after you had left to return back to Kattegat.

“Then you are nearer to your ultimate ambition, of being King of Norway.” Your brother patted Harald's shoulder and gave him a smile.

“I think it is impossible Björn. How could I ever overthrow King Ragnar, besides, Bragi’s done a good job at keeping the peace between us.”

“As for you Björn I want to say we believe in you, we believe in this journey and we believe the gods are with you.” Halfdan said charmingly as he placed a hand on Björns shoulder, peeking over your brother’s shoulder and wiggling his eyebrows at you.  

“Come meet my the rest of my brothers.” Björn offered as he lead them over to where your siblings sat with their own drinks.

“Ubbe, Hvitserk, Sigurd and Ivar, and of course Bragi, you remember.” The brothers gave yours some smiles. “Hvitserk and Bragi are coming with us.”

“I remember you.” Harald laughed. “I remember all of you. But how you've all grown tall. You're not boys anymore!”

“I'm am much taller when I stand up.” Ivar said as he took a drink from his cup.

“I'm sure you wish you could come with us.” Halfdan said to Ivar

“Go to Hell.”

You glared at your brother, eyes sharp.

You noticed Floki sneak up behind Halfdan and surprise him, before pulling both the brothers into a hug. You smiled when Halfdan enthusiastically embraced Floki, incredibly happy to see him

“Come, come see Helga.” Floki offered and dragged the two brothers away with him. You laughed away his enthusiasm. It was good to see Floki so happy again. You watched from next Björn, as Floki, Helga and the brothers toasted.

“You missed them.” Björn murmured to you. “I could see it in your eyes.” He wrapped an arm around your shoulders and squeezed. “Do not get wrapped up in them again.”

You shook Björns hand off you and moved away from him, eyes cast towards the floor as you left the Hall until the sacrifice was to be performed. You stood with your brothers, as your step-mother filled the bowl with blood and performed the sacrifice before anointing you with the blood.

Finally, by the end of the night after you had drank and ate your fill, Halfdan approached you, eyes apologetic as you sat on a set steps a bit of a ways away from the great Hall on your own in the dark.

“I was looking for you, after we ate.” He called out when he was a few feet away. “But I could not find you.”

“You were busy Halfdan.” You said without looking up from your hands. “I didn't want to distract from the excitement nor keep you all to myself.”

“You know I've been missing you Bragi.” He stopped in front of you, reaching down to tilt your head up to look at him. “Are you jealous?”

You yanked your head away from his hand. “No? Why would I be jealous?”

“Because everyone is giving Björn attention, that  _ I've _ been giving Björn attention instead of you.” He squatted in front of you, tilting your head up again to meet your eyes.

“I’m not jealous of Björn, you know that.” Truthfully, you did feel a little jealous of him, but you loved your brother and it never bothered you for long. Besides, when you lifted your eyes to meet Halfdans you couldn’t help but smile.

“I have spent all those years after you left Vestfold, thinking about how we were together. The man you are now.” He searched your face. “By the gods you've grown up Bragi, you are blessing from the Gods.”

Even in the dark, you knew he could see how red your cheeks had become at the compliment. You broke into a smile and leaned in to press your lips against his.

“I thought maybe you'd forgotten about me, about us.” You whispered as you pulled away. “It’s really been a long time.

“Oh Bragi…” He lamented softly and stood, pulling you to your feet. He dragged you away from the houses and the Great Hall, towards where you knew the forest was. The comfort and company of darkness that hid the two of you from the rest of prying eyes in Kattegat.

You stumbled in the dark with Halfdan behind you, until it had been ten minutes of travelling deeper among the trees, before he spun you around to face him, your faces illuminated by the moon through the trees

“Look at you.” He gasped. “You've become a man.” He pushed you up against a tree after shrugging off his furred coat, pressing his lips to yours and his fingers tangling through the dozens of thin braids in your hair. You tangled your hands in his hair, tugging on it as he slid a thigh between your legs, tempting you to roll your hips against him in search of friction. You tugged roughly at Halfdan's hair, before pushing him away from you and shrugging out of your tunic and pants, watching him do the same as he kept his eyes trained on you.   

You smiled as he pulled you close to him, before causing you both to tumble into the grass, him beneath you, as he yanked you over him and placed you onto his lap, before grasping your chin and pulling you down close to him and to whisper in your ear.

“Have you seen how you looked. When you were just a young man, but now, gods I want to to keep you. I would never let you leave my bed.” He murmured, his hands roaming over you body, groping your chest and hips, gripping your thighs and squeezing, scratching your body. He flipped you both over, pressing kisses and bites against your throat, listening to your whimpers and gasps.  

He seemed to have brought a vial of oil with him and as he moved, rearranging you so that he was saddled in your lap, grinning madly down at you.

“I've thought about nothing but this for a decade, waiting to feel you.” He said, his voice low as he leaned over you. “As if I could ever forget the man that I’ve been dreaming of for years.” He snuck a hand behind him, pressing oiled fingers against his ass and grasping the the shaft of your cock. You whimpered and jerked your hips forward, rubbing the head of your cock against him.

“Oh Gods Halfdan!” Your hands found purchase on his hips as he sunk down onto you, the whites of his eyes showing as he stared, rolling his hips against yours as he did so. You slid your hand from his waist to spit in it, and then reaching for his cock, meeting his eyes as he began to pant, muscles shaking as he moved, bouncing on your cock. You sat up while twisting your wrist, pressing your face into Halfdan's shoulder, biting into his flesh and laving your tongue over the marks you left. You ran your free hand through his hair and pulled his head to the side, suckling marks onto his neck where the plain eye could see.

He panted and cursed, as you began to roll your hips to the same rhythm as he did, pulling him again into a deep, biting kiss. You felt his body shake, and you surged forward, pinning Halfdan beneath you and beginning to thrust into him without abandon, gasping and smiling down at him.

“Bless the gods.” You gasped, staring down at Halfdan as he clutched at your chest, scratching and marking you. “Halfdan I.” You stumbled over your words as you rolled your hips, dropping to your elbows to press a other deeper kiss to his lips as your rhythm began to falter, the tight coil of lust and warmth in your stomach making your muscles clench and your fingers tremble as they threaded through Halfdan's hair.

Halfdan choked down a gasp beneath you, his body tensing and his hips jerking upwards, cumming across his chest and even staining your own. You stuttered at the tightness that enveloped your cock, releasing into him and dropping your body weight onto Halfdan, smearing the mess between your bodies.

You pressed another, more confident kiss to his cheek, and then his lips, before rolling off of him and reaching around in the dark for something to clean off the mess with.

Halfdan began to laugh, breathless and breathtakingly beautiful in the moonlight as you rolled over to look at him, as he laid with his arms outstretched, the tattoos on his body on display. You sat up and cleaned your chest, before rolling over and watching him.

“Would you like a painted picture of me.” He teased after you stared at him in silence for a moment

You chuckled, crawling toward him with the strip of your tunic that you had torn off, and you began to wipe his chest for him, fingers tracing the tattoos on his skin.

“You are awe-inspiring Halfdan.” you whispered as you laid your head on his chest. He ran his hands through your hair and smiled at the sky.

“You waited for me did you?” He asked softly.

“I could not get you out of my mind.” You turned over to face him. “You indulged me when I was younger and now, there’s so much more out there Halfdan.”

“You could have come with me. You could have stayed with me after Rogaland.” He propped himself up on his elbows. “I wanted you to, but I believed that the gods would have led me to you, time and time again.”

You shook your head and pressed your face into his shoulder. “I wanted to. But I swore my loyalty to my father.” You whispered, almost afraid to admit it. “I did not want to forfeit my place in Valhalla. So that if I never saw you again. I could at least find you there.

Halfdan scoffed before sitting up, adjusting your head in his lap. “I would have fought the gods if you were not allowed in Valhalla.”

You took a deep breath. “Does your brother know?” You asked softly. Halfdan tilted his head and hummed. “About us? About you and I together?”

“He has his questions, but he thinks that I've finally met a girl, like he has met his Princess.” You chuckled and shook your head

“If I did not care for Björn or Sigurd. Then it would be easy for me, to leave Kattegat, to join you and your brother.” You thought about your siblings and your step-mother, your upbringing and your childhood. “ I love my brothers but...” You paused before turning your head back to look up at the stars.

“But what Bragi?” You let a small smile slip over your lips as you closed your eyes.

“I do not know Halfdan.” You said with a small yawn, wrapping an arm around him. He reached over and grabbed his cloak, before pulling it over the both of you, the warmth from the furs embracing you.

“We can figure it out in the morning.” He soothed the hair on your head and laid back against the soft grass. “Sleep well Bragi.” 

The both of you woke up just before dawn, slapping off some mosquitos that were sticking to your skin, Halfdan laughed, looking up towards the sky as you pulled your pants and tunic on. “Don’t suppose we couldn’t have stayed out here for a few more hours.” He asked softly. You brushed another bug off of your skin, frowning. 

“I think I’d prefer it if we were in my bed.” You pulled yourself to your feet, dusting yourself off in the quasi-darkness. Halfdan pulled his pants on, but slung his tunic over his shoulder. You both walked back through Kattegat in a lazy stroll, the quietness of the town gave you both a sense of security, as cold wind blew across the streets. He slid his fingers into your hand as you fiddled with the lock on your door. Once you pushed the door open and tugged him inside, you turned your attention to your supplies on your shelves. Halfdan lounged onto your bed, tucking your pillow under his chin. 

“What are you doing?” Halfdan asked curiously from your bead, as you sketched chalked circles onto the floor of your kitchen. 

“Checking to see if our good fortune will hold.”  You reached behind you for a small bowl of herbs, placing it into the centre of the circle, muttering under your breath to yourself as you held a knife to the palm of your hand, slicing at your wrist. You squeezed your hand, pouring the drizzle of your blood into the bowl. You muttered a few prayers, before dropping your runes with your free hand over the bowl. 

Halfdan slipped out of your bed, walking over to you, stepping around the circles on the floor to stand at your side. He held your hand gently, as you scanned the runes on the floor. He rubbed his thumb over the cut, coating his thumb with your blood. He pressed his lips to the cut, distracting you from your runes. His voice was soft as he pulled your hand away from his face, marking four lines across his face with your blood. “Our good fortune has always held, with our devotions to the gods.” He murmured softly, pressing your hand to the side of his face that wasn’t marked. “And it will continue, I am sure of that.” 

You felt the corner of your lips pull into a smile as you looked at the runes. “You may be right.” You murmured back to him, scooping up the runes into your uninjured palm. You put them away, onto the table as you leaned down to pick up the bowl of blood. Halfdan dipped his fingers into it with his free hand, and smeared them across your face, smiling at you. He pulled you in for another kiss as you heard roosters crowing outside. 

The sun was starting to filter into the room from your window, across your bed and onto the chalk circles on the floor. Halfdan clutched onto your face like you were something precious, pulling you to your feet as he moved, he walked you backwards towards the wall next to your door, pressing you up against it once you reached it. His fingers brushed against your skin in a desperate gesture, gasping softly against your mouth. You dropped your hands to his waist, curling your fingers against his bare skin. As much as you wanted to stay like this forever with him, the bustling noise of Kattegat waking up outside broke the both of you apart. 

You let out a soft wine as he pulled away. He gave you a soft smug smirk, pressing the front of his body against yours, sliding his hands down your sides. You tried to pull him back again for another kiss but he tutted at you, a mischievous glint in his eyes. 

“We don’t have time.”  He murmured as you head voices pass your door. You pouted slightly, and he pulled you back in to peck your cheek. “As much as I would, love to have you again.” He tenderly caressed your cheek. His hand dropped down to yours, lifting your cut palm. “Let me take care of this for you?” He tenderly brushed his fingers across the cut. “Before we have to go back to pretending.” He sounded so sad as he said it. You nodded, letting him lead you over towards your shelving. He scanned through your supplies, before pulling a bowl and a few stips of muslin you had pre-prepared.

He wrapped your hand for you, gently pressing a kiss to it when he was done. He lifted his face to you. “The runes promised us good fortune.” You paused. “Maybe we don’t have to pretend.” 

“You know the risks Bragi. For all we know everyone would shun us.” He dropped his eyes. You’d never seen Halfdan looked so unsettled and upset before, like the idea that no one would accept the two of you hurt him.

You shook your head. “We don’t have to tell anyone, it’s your decision, entirely yours, I’ll be happy with whatever you choose, as long as I am with you.” His expression shifted and a smile graced his lips.

“I will always be with you.” He promised, pushing his forehead against yours. You both stayed there like that for a few moments, before pulling apart. He took a deep breath, like he was steeling himself before he walked over to the bed, where he snatched up his tunic and put it on. 

“Hey.” You grabbed his arm before he could open the door and walk out. “I love you Halfdan.” You met his eyes as you said that, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to his lips. “I truly love you.” You both walked down to the docks where many of the men, including both your brothers were, were preparing the ships for your departure.

You and Halfdan separated with a small brush of your hands against each others, before you moved over to where your brother and Floki were gathering a few items into crates. Your brother greeted you, but didn’t say much to you, to your relief. He grunted his greeting and turned his attention to directing the men around him. Floki however looked at you curiously, grinning as he took in the marks visible under the V-neck of your tunic and the slight traces of blood left across your hairline.

“I did not see you during the rest of the celebrations Bragi after we ate.” He said softly. “Did your mystery lover return to Kattegat with King Haralds men?

You wiped your hands clean from the dirt as you turned to face Floki, a small smile on your face as your eyes wandered over to Harald and Halfdan. “My lost lover might, have returned. Is there something you need Floki?”

“I want you to be careful. I may not care who you sleep with, who you’re spoken for.” his eyes flicked over towards the brothers. “But others will, not everyone will be as open to, you two. Björn did not like you being so close to them the last time they were here.”

You sighed to yourself. “You know?.” You said softly, turning your attentions away from Harald and Halfdan to meet Floki’s eyes.

“I saw him leave your house this morning. The both of you are, very obvious together.” Floki licked his thumb before reached out to rub at the dried blood on your face, laughing when you looked surprised. “You should take better care about hiding it, if you don’t intend to announce it.” He clapped your shoulder and led you towards Harald and Haldan’s boats, an arm wrapped around your shoulders, delivering you to the brothers on the docks.

Your mother came to you, pulling you close and pressing a kiss to the side of your head. “You look after your brother.” She eyed the brothers behind you. “And you two, take care of my sons.” Your mother threatened them with a stare. You watched her walk over to Björn and hug him tight, him kissing the side of her head. Halfdan patted your back, pulling your attention away from your brother and mother. You climbed onto the boat, Halfdan gripping your arms to steady you as you stepped into it. You gave him a sweet smile as the horns blew.


	12. Chapter 12

A week and a half into the journey, just as it always had been since the beginning, you were on a boat with Halfdan, and it had started to rain. Like it had many times before and you assumed you would many times after this, you turned to Halfdan with your eyebrows raised.

“You, bring the rain whenever I’m on a boat with you.” You stared accusingly at him, poking a finger against his chest.

“Bragi it’s not my fault.” You heard him chuckled.

Harald laughed as you took his coat from him, wrapping it around yourself with a poke of your tongue. “This is the rain tax, because I am tired of being cold when I’m on a boat with you.” He grabbed your wrist, eyes meeting yours.

“Then you have to stay by my side, or I will be cold and wet without you to keep me warm.” He pouted at you, with playful and pleading eyes.

You laughed at him, slinging his coat off your shoulders and placing them back around his. “Now I wouldn’t let you die in the cold now. Would I?” Your smile was tender as you met his eyes. “I would suffer without you.” You dramatically held a hand to your chest.

Harald laughed at the two of you, all smiles despide the droplets of rain that began to fall. You opened your arms wide, staring up into the bright sky despite the water and the dark clouds rolling in the distance. You laughed as it began to rain properly, not just a slight drizzle, and the spray salt water splashed against your faces.

“Now I don’t mind being wet. It’s the thunder at night that I don’t like.” You raised both your eyebrows at Halfdan with a smile. You shrugged off your coat, and your armour, reveling in the wind that blew against the ships.  You grabbed the rope next to your head, hoisting yourself up onto the side of the boat as Harald’s men rowed.

The brothers laughed at the both of you, smiling at your excitement. “We’re going to see the Mediterranean! Aren’t the both of you excited?” You looked down at them, smile wide on your face.

“We are excited Bragi, we’re just wary with the rain.” Harald smiled at you, stepping closer to you.

“You know I absolutely hate the rain at night Harald but look now, it’s magical! Huh?” You stared back up towards the sky. “Makes you wonder what the gods are really thinking up there.”

“Maybe they’re trying to bless our journey again.” Halfdan joked, a reference to what he said when you sailed to Paris with your father.

“You.” You pointed to him. “Just want me to take off my clothes.” Harald clapped his brother on the back.

“Not that you aren’t good looking Bragi.” He laughed. “But I think the women in the Mediterranean would appreciate that more than us.”

As you approached the Normandy coast you stood almost behind Harald and Halfdan, subtly hiding, unwilling to face the possibility that it was your uncle on the approaching boats. Halfdan noticed this and kept a hand on your shoulder as you were guided up to a castle.

Your uncle greeted you all in French. You hid behind Halfdan, when your uncle introduced his children, your cousins. Princess Gisla, spoke towards you all in French as well. 

“My wife wants to know why you are here. So do I.”

As Rollo took your brothers map and your weapons, you trembled, clutching tight onto Halfdan. You didn't like what was going on, nor did you trust anything that came from Rollo’s mouth.

You backed up when the French guards held a spear to Halfdan’s throat, pulling your axe from your hip. The other guards, took your weapons and the weapons from everyone else. Halfdan looked affronted when Rollo tried to speak to you, his hand immediately coming across your chest before the guards ushered you away. You stuck close to Halfdan, even when they chained you up.

You were cold. The Frankish dungeons were cold and dark, tensions ran and Harald and Halfdan chastised your brother. You said nothing in his defence, but nothing to support them, instead, hiding your head between your hands, the cold seeping into your bones slightly. It took a long time, Halfdan did his best to warm you up, but it wasn’t much use when the stones were damp and cold and numbing you. He brushed your hair out of your face and pressed you against his chest when the others weren’t really looking.

You kept quiet when Halfdan yelled at your brother, scaring you slightly, he noticed you flinched and placed an arm on your knee, rubbing it. Björn looked at you for support and you shrugged. “I love you, but he’s a traitor Björn, I didn’t agree to this.” Björn’s face fell at that. You felt guilty, as Halfdan rubbed his hand across your knee to sooth you.

The doors to the prison opened and about four or five Frankish soldier entered, causing Halfdan to jump and stand next to the door, glaring at them, they removed your brother and left without anything other than warnings not to move. You shook, somehow despite living in Kattegat, the cold dampness that seeped into your skin and down to your bones made you shiver. Halfdan noticed, and ducked to sit next to you, pulling you close to his side, tucking you under his shoulder as well as he could with both his hands chained. It was another hour and a half before some guards came back in, speaking to you in French slowly. From what you understood, you were released from holding, you walked out with Halfdan and Harald flanking you, under the impression that Rollo had allowed you all to leave with safe passage along the Frankish coastline, until he spoke to you all, with a change of clothes, announcing he was to sail with you. You did not expect Björn to allow Rollo to sail with all of you but he did it anyway. You glared at him from Halfdan and Harald's ship, the younger brother with a hand on your lower back.

The journey took more than a few days before your uncle attempted to talk to you while you were bringing a crate over to your brothers boat. You were immediately flanked by Halfdan and Harald, the brothers glaring down at him.

“You will not speak to Bragi, or even look in his direction. You have no right!” Halfdan spat, moving in front of you and getting in his face, eyes wide with anger. “You’re a traitor to our kind.”

“He is my nephew. I have every right.” Your uncle protested. You handed off the crate to Hvitserk, before turning to face your uncle, eyes narrowed

“You lost that right when you betrayed our family. You are not my uncle.” You turned away, stepping onto the plank and returning back to Harald and Halfdan's boat, the brothers following you sending glares to your uncle.

The fog and the cold that enveloped your journey dampened your surroundings and your clothes. Halfdan had reserved a place sitting next to him, his cloak wrapped around you as you as lay with your head against the wood of the boat, your eyes half closed almost falling asleep as Halfdan tended to his responsibilities with his brother.

Sometimes you found yourself staring at the brothers when Harald need to talk to Halfdan. You would watch, while Harald whispered to Halfdan, looking at Björn with what looked like a glare, it forced a feeling at the back of your mind to come forward, one of slight dread and nervousness. Every time Harald would whisper to Halfdan and look at your brother, Halfdan would pat his shoulder, raise his eyes towards the sky and say something back and Harald would calm down.

The next night you heard music playing and you left the boats with your brothers, Harald and Halfdan, carrying your axe. You were amazed by the colours surrounding you, distracted b the soft sands and the aromas and scents that filled the air from the different tents. You ran with Harald and Halfdan, hacking away at the strange people while tasting colourful fruit and and dipping your fingers in the colourful aromatic spices that were on display, taken aback at how spicy some of them were. You picked up a green vegetable among the spices, eyeing it carefully before taking a bite out of it, only to spit it out and whimper, rubbing your tongue against the fabric of your tunic as it burnt your mouth.

Halfdan came up from behind you and slung an arm around your shoulder before he dragged you to a dark corner, away from some of the fighting. He pushed you up against the wall, laughing and pressing his forehead against yours, his body was almost vibrating from the battle. He pulled away and smiled at you, before lifting an armring into your line of sight and waving it in front of your face.

“For you, my very own prince.” He practically giggled at you and handed it to you. You smiled, still giddy off the high of the fight, as you heard your folk continue to slaughter strangers around you and you pressed a kiss to his throat, listening to the soft moan he let out when you mouthed at his skin.

“Thank you Halfdan.” You murmured against him. He pulled you close and kissed you hard, wrapping one hand around your waist and the other clutching your cheek, pressing your head against the wall behind you. “Gods I am glad I have met you.”

You both turned at the sound of a sword clattering nearby to you, and you pulled apart. You raised your axe as Halfdan did, only to see Harald round the corner, blood splattered on his face. The three of you, and a handful of men then followed Floki’s path to the large domed building filled with chanting men.

You followed Halfdan as he stepped between the people carefully, avoiding disturbing them as Harald questioned Floki about the place.  He told you it was a place of worship, a temple and that they were praying. Harald didn't understand why there weren't any form of their gods present.

“I hate that sound!” Halfdan slashed his sword across a man's throat, taking off his head. Before Harald could gesture to his men to do the same to the others Floki stopped him.

You kept your eyes trained on Floki as Harald conceded to him and ordered his men to leave. Halfdan lingered behind and Floki took a step towards him.

“If I find out you hurt Bragi in any way that he did not ask you for. I will murder you myself.” He whispered harshly, staring down at the other viking.

You rolled your eyes as Halfdan turned to send you a questioning glance. “He knew, after our night in the woods, I don't know how.”

“Even a blind man could see that you two have been together. The marks you leave all over each other, how he always has a hand on you. You’re lucky your brothers are surprisingly too thick to have noticed, either of you. They haven’t been watching the both of you for as long as I have.” Floki poked one of your hickeys, eyeing the ones you left on Halfdan under the cover of darkness on the boats. “Look at you, you’re not even trying to hide it.”

“I’m possessive.” Halfdan pulled you to his side and said by way of explanation. “We both are.”

You regrouped, and the brothers led you through the hall of mirrors, finding the room of women that your brothers had already found. You knew that Halfdan would be obliged to take one of them, as much as his brother urged him to do so, you felt your stomach clench when you saw Halfdan’s eyes darken. Harald gestured for you to join in, watching your eyes. You chewed on your bottom lip, eyes flicking to Halfdan’s back as he hovered over a woman, you looked back at Harald, clenching your jaw. You shook your head before you excused yourself with a nod and left the room, aware of Harald’s eyes on your retreating form. You ignored the jealous that spiked in your chest. You met with some of the other men. ignoring the questioning looks from them.

“They were not to my taste.” You offered as an excuse, before heading back towards the camp by the boats, still wrapped in Halfdan’s cloak, the armring he gave you now sat next to your father's. After a while, you heard singing coming from Harald and Halfdan, and the rest of their men as they returned to the camp by the boats. Halfdan slid into your bed in your tent, grinning down at you. He smiled apologetically, leaning in for a kiss. You clutched his face, threading your fingers through his hair and tugging on it, rolling you both over so that he was tucked, caged between his arms on your back.

He moaned beneath you, hands gripping your hips as you rolled them against his lap. You yanked his head back, kissing the side of his head, and then down to his cheek and jaw, mouthing and sucking marks onto the underside of his jaw and throat, biting him with a smile on your face. You pulled away to take off your armour and tunic, slipping your hands under his as he began to scratch your back.

You pinched his nipples harshly beneath his tunic, smiling when you heard him gasp and let out a whimper. You scratched your nails along his chest, drinking in his moans and gasps as he began to thrust his hips up against your arse, his eyes wide and pleading with you for more.

You smiled at him, pulling him in for another bruising kiss before rolling off of him and pulling a pillow underneath your head. He stared at you in shock, eyes wide as you just stopped.

“Bragi?” He leaned over, scrambled, crawling over to you. You smirked at him, poking your tongue out at him. “ _ Bragi. _ ” He whined at you.

“I’m not touching any more of you until you wash whatever whore you had off of your skin.” Your smile widened when he pouted at you, grinding his hips against your leg.

“Go.” You shooed him away, wiggling slowly out of the rest of your clothes. “I’ll be here when you’re done. I’ll be ready for you.” You pushed your pants down your thighs, as he scrambled backwards out of your tent, eyes wide as he nodded

“Don’t you move.” He pointed at you before ducking out of your tent. You waited a while, teasing yourself with your hands and preparing yourself, muffling your moans and gasps while passing the time waiting for Halfdan. He ducked back into your tent, with just his pants on, gasping when he saw you, waiting naked on the bed, your hand scratching across your own chest, pinching at your nipples. You turned your head to look at him, eyes hooded and a lazy smile on your face.

“What are you waiting for Halfdan?” You wiggled your eyebrows at him, spreading your legs in full view of him.

“Look at you.” He gasped, eyes trained on your body. He crawled between your legs, immediately attacking your chest, replacing your hands with his mouth. “Please Bragi.” He murmured against your chest. “Show me I’m yours.”

You reared forward, grabbing his shoulders and twisting your body so that he was beneath you. He gasped up at you, hands clutching onto your biceps. “You’re always mine.” You grasped his cheek, looking him in the eyes. You sat yourself up in his lap, grinding your ass against his crotch, reaching down to slip your hand under his pants, gripping his cock and grinning when he gasped, and whimpered when you tightened your grip. “You’re mine!” You pushed his pants down his thighs, meeting his eyes as you sunk onto him, your mouth dropping open at the stretch. You whimpered, rolling your hips as you began to ride him, reaching down to grip his throat. He dropped his hands to your hips, digging his nails into you and scratching at your skin on your chest, sides, back and hips until you bled. You dropped your other hand to his stomach, scratching your nails across his skin as you rode him, throwing your head back while moaning. You clenched around him,digging your knees into the bed and roughing pushing yourself onto his cock. Halfdan sat up, your hand still around his throat as he dug his nails into your shoulders, pulling you down onto him as he began to thrust up against you.

You leaned in to whisper into his ear. You tightened your grip on his throat, panting next to his ear. “Harder Halfdan, do it harder!” You squeezed your hand and scratched your nails against his throat. He moaned, rearing forward to tip you both over, hovering over you, thrusting into you brutally and powerfully, making you whimper and scream. You felt his hands drag down your back, definitely making you bleed in long lines before he pinned your hips down to the bed and began to fuck you in earnest, making you cry out loudly.

You didn’t care if anyone heard you as your hand slipped from his throat to clutch at his side, fingers digging into his flesh. He grunted and moaned into your ear, thrusts stuttering and becoming faster, harder, until he finished inside you, pressing his mouth to you in a bruising kiss, biting your bottom lip till you bled.

He pulled out of you, sitting up before arranging you in his lap, pressing kisses, soft and gentle ones to the shaved sides of your head. You cupped his cheek gently, pulling him for a softer, slower kiss, before you both laid back, your head against his chest. He stroked your hair until you fell asleep.

The next morning, when you woke up, you turned your head to look at Halfdan, asleep, his mouth slightly parted, and his fringe flattened over his face. You rolled out of bed, careful not to wake him, forgoing your tunic as you ducked outside your tent for a breath of fresh air. You took a walk, meeting your brother and Hvitserk who were fully dressed.

“Bragi!” Björn called out to you, eyes dropping to your scratched and marked chest. “You must have had a fun night.” He commented.

“I did.” You smiled at him, eyes bright.

“We’re going to trek up to that ridge there. When King Harald finds his brother. Get your things. Come with us.” Björn patted your shoulder, laughing when you winced. You nodded, before heading back to your tent to get ready, shaking Halfdan awake.

“Huh what?” He sat up, rubbing his eyes.

“Get dressed my love.” You smiled at him. “Your brother’s looking for you.” He crawled over to his clothes, slipping into them and then pulling on his armour.You pulled him in for a short kiss, before leaving your tent. Halfdan following you straight after. You all trekked up to the top of the ridge, looking over at the vast ocean. Despite the view and Halfdan’s hand on your back, you were distracted, eyes on the ravens that circled about your head.

_ “How the little piggies will grunt, when they hear how the old boar suffered.” _

Your eyes went wet as you realized what happened. Your eyes turning to your brothers as the crows began circling.

“My father is dead.” You heard Björn whisper.

“Our father... “ You whispered quietly, choking back your tears as your fears were confirmed by the gods.

You met your brothers eyes. You all needed to go home.

 

* * *

 

You spent the trip back to Kattegat curled in Halfdan's cloak, ignoring the looks your uncle and brothers gave you. Your eyes stayed red rimmed with tears as you stared into the sky, cursing and pleading silently. As nights fell you let Halfdan, under the cover of darkness soothe away your fears with soft kisses, shielded underneath your blanket away from prying eyes, his rough thumbs brushing away your tears.

You soon approached the coast of Frankia where Rollo was to depart.

“Are you going to go home?” Björn asked him.

Your uncle stood up and offered land to you and your folk, as Floki scoffed.

“Too much bad blood Rollo.” Your brother muttered.

“Once a betrayer always a betrayer.” Hvitserk murmured. You stayed silent by Halfdan and Harald.

Your arrival in Kattegat was only now in your grasp. It would only be a few more weeks before you were to to see the rest of your family again. Between Harald and Halfdan’s secretive whispering when they thought you weren’t looking, and the closing distance between home and new troubles. You found it hard to even sit comfortably wrapped in Halfdan’s coat, the furs doing little to calm and warm you. Your stares on the brothers didn’t go unnoticed, Halfdan would catch your eye as he whispered to his brother. You swallowed the lump in your throat, the feeling from before now pushed to the front of your mind, that maybe Harald was still trying to overthrow your father’s legacy and would try to be King of all Norway.  Your insecurities bothered you, overwhelmed you, along with the death of your father, and the next time you met Halfdan’s eyes, you started to cry feeling dumb. He looked concerned and he moved to come to you but you shook your head and stumbled to your feet, turning to stare over to the water around you

 

* * *

 

Your arrival in Kattegat was met with a bustling business that you didn't expect, the port was filled with unknown ships and banners you did not recognize. As Björn headed straight for the Great Hall. You followed, with Harald and Halfdan ahead of you. The quiet of the streets, and the inside of the Great Hall unnerved you, as did the men you did not recognize standing guard outside the Hall.

As Björn broke down the door you caught sight of Ivar and Ubbe standing in front and behind of Lagertha. You saw Sigurd with a knife held to his throat.

“If you kill her my brothers. You will have to kill me and Bragi too.” Björn said as he stepped up towards Ivar.

“Maybe we should.” You wanted to kick your brother for being so stupid.

“Shut up.”

“She killed our mother.” Your eyes flew to Lagertha, relieved that she succeeded in getting her revenge.

You felt Halfdan's hand on your back as a comfort, although the feeling was strained, as Björn took control of the situation, stating that you were all to avenge your father. Ubbe and Ivar left the hall,  glancing at you on their way out.

Halfdan and Harald left you to your own devices, to attend to their own men for the night. You understood their reasoning and you understood that you couldn't take all of Halfdan's time. It did something to fester your insecurities however, and you spent your night in your bed, contemplating things with your axe above you. He did join you after his work was done, sliding into bed and leaving everything but his pants laying on the floor. He slid under your blankets, a hand coming up to cover yours, before he took the axe from your grip and placed it to the side of the bed.

“My prince.” He whispered against you, his voice sweet. “My  _ prince _ .” He said it so carefully, dragging his hand down your side. You shifted, turning your head to the side to meet his eyes.

“Halfdan?”

“There we are.” He whispered to you, propping himselfup on his elbow, looking down at you.  “I wanted to ask you something.” He murmured. You blinked a few times, tilting your head curiously.

“Yes Halfdan?” You nuzzled against him, brushing your lips past his nose and against his cheek.

“Will you marry me?”

You paused. “I'm sorry what did you say.” You pulled away to look at him.

“Will you marry me? When this is all done? When we defeat King Alle, come back with me to Vestfold.”

“You would want to marry me?” You asked softly, placing a hand on Halfdan’s face.

“Of course I would.” He smiled at you. “Did you doubt my love for you?”

“I have one question.” You gave him a shy smile, hand reaching back towards your axe, where Halfdan left it. “Are you and Harald trying to steal Kattegat away from my mother?” Halfdan sat up, eyes staring wide at you. You sat up yourself, pulling your axe into your lap, fingers tapping over the blade. He tried to lean forward, but you held your axe to his throat, moving on your bed to your knees. “You see, I thought it was just my insecurities, being overwhelmed with my father’s death and my jealousy.” You began slowly, pressing your axe against his throat. “But then I decided to  _ listen _ . I heard you talking to that bastard. I heard you talking to Harald about overthrowing my brother so he could be king.” You glared at him when he tried to speak.

“Are you using me Halfdan?”

“Bragi,  _ no! _ ”

“Have you been using me from the start Halfdan, since you had to carry me home, all in your ambitions to help your brother.”

“Bragi I can promise you. You have nothing to do with my brother’s ambitions.” He protested. “Harald doesn’t even know about us. I love you!” He raised his hand to cover yours, pulling your axe away from his throat. “I swear it, on my sacred ring. On all my rings. I’d do nothing to harm you.”

You sighed. “Prove it. Prove that I’m not just a way for you to help your brother.” He slipped out of bed at that, pulling his clothes back on, gesturing to yours in the corner.

“Put your clothes on.” He said, moving around the room and digging through his things. “Now.”

“What are you doing?” You tilted your head as you began to pull your clothes on.

“I’m going to prove it to you. Hurry up, we have to move.” He grabbed your arm when you were dressed, dragging you out of your house and to Helga and Floki’s house, knocking on the door desperately. Helga answered, eyes wide and concerned.

“Where’s Floki?” Halfdan asked after she gestured the both of you inside. Floki peaked his head up from around the corner from a second room.

“Halfdan, Bragi.” He smiled. “What brings you to our house this late?”

“I want you to officiate our marriage. Now.” Halfdan held your hand tightly. “I want to marry Bragi.” Floki’s face changed, and he laughed, nodding eagerly.

“Of course.” Helga shot you a smile and rubbed your shoulder.

“Do you have a ring?” Floki turned to the two of you. To your surprise, Halfdan pulled out of somewhere, you didn’t know where. He held it out to Floki, meeting your eyes.

“I suppose I have to give Bragi away.” Helga kept her smile on you, grasping your hand.

“Do you swear to love each other, and stay true to one another.” Floki began as he cut his hand, using his own blood to coat the ring. “To accept the invisible bindings that can be seen by the gods. To accept one another.”

“I do.” Halfdan shot a smile at you, his eyes sincere. You felt tears prick your eyes and grasped his hand with your right. You swallowed the lump in your throat, bottom lip trembling.

“I do.” You murmured. Floki passed the ring to Halfdan, and he slipped it onto your ring finger, pulling you close to kiss you gently, his eyes fluttering shut, as did yours. Your hand clutched his cheek, pulling him close. You heard Helga make a delighted noise when you pulled apart, and she looked happily at the both of you. Halfdan pulled out a similar ring, slipping it onto his own ring finger, locking his hand with yours.

“I love you Bragi.” Halfdan murmured to you. “I’ll always, love you.”

 

* * *

 

You stood with Halfdan and Harald just a bit of a ways away from the ports as more people arrived to pay tribute to your mother, and in memory of your father.

“Who are these ones then?” Halfdan asked. After last night, you were a little bit more wary with Harald, but after Halfdan had dragged you out to see Floki, begging him to marry the two of you, to prove to you he wouldn’t harm you, that he would never use you, it made it easier for you to trust him again. You fiddled with the ring on your finger, not recognizing who those people were but Harald replied.

“They are Danes. Don't you think?” Harald laughed.

“Yes it's obvious.” You shook your head at them both.

“Look!” The enthusiasm in Harald's voice made you snap to attention as Halfdan straightened.

“What? what?”

“Can't you see her?” He asked.

“Who? See who?

“It's her! it is.” Harald couldn't take his eyes off of her.

“No its not.” Halfdan argued, you still didn’t have a clue what they were talking about.

“Yes it is, you know it is that is the woman who made me believe I had to be king of all Norway before she would marry me. That is my princess. I have thought of her every day of my life.” The conviction in Harald's voice made you smile, and you placed a hand on Halfdan's back. “That's her!” Harald sounded like a boy in love.

“Well then you ought to go say hello brother.” Halfdan said, shoving his brother playfully forward. You didn't think you'd ever see Harald ever be so shy, as he looked uncertain about approaching his princess, however she disappeared out of sight before he could move.

The next time you saw Harald lay his eyes on his Princess it was at the celebrations, his brother had shoved him forward to speak to her. You stood next to Halfdan, watching their conversation. You caught their movements, looking towards a man, and from the tone of Harald's voice, Halfdan stepped forward, handing his knife to his brother. You didn't interfere. You knew what happened to those who broke promises, but when Harald let her go you were relieved. He turned back to the both of you, pressing his knife against his brothers chest before leaving the Great Hall. You wanted to go after him, you did not like seeing Harald upset.

“No, leave him.” Halfdan pulled you back. “He will want time to himself.”

“But-”

“No Bragi. He needs to be alone.” He pulled you to his chest. He held you close, as close as you could be to him without raising any questions.

 

* * *

 

You stood respectfully by Halfdan and Harald during the sacrifice, but your eyes wandered through the crowd, and flicked to glance at Halfdan out of the corner of your eye.

When you saw that Björn had disappeared from the ceremony, you felt at ease to take Halfdans hand and pull him slowly through the crowd, away from the people and through the empty streets of Kattegat, towards the docks and the boats, giving him a teasing grin as you shed your clothing in the sand and ran in, splashing water in his direction. You heard him laugh, among the silence in the air and you watched as his silhouette shed it's clothes and joined you in the water

It was times like these that you were lucky you were the one that brought the least attention to yourself. Being able to sneak away to have soft, gentle moments with Halfdan brightened your soul.

As he picked you up by your waist, shattering your thoughts as you kicked your legs in the water. He dunked you and laughed as you came out, hair sopping wet and plastered to the front of your face.

“You...” You ran to him, as fast as you could manage through the water before tackling him into the shallows and giggling as he flicked his wet fringe from his face.

“You’re a menace.” He jokingly growled at you, rolling you both over so that you were beneath him, letting the waves splash into his face. You held your hand, your ring in front of your face, before leaning down to kiss him.

“I’m sorry for not trusting you.” He smiled and kissed you.

“It’s not your fault. I should have been clear from the beginning. I wanted to love you from the day I met you, and the gods willed it” You chewed on your bottom lip before hugging him close in the water. He splashed some water into your face and you yelped, splashing some back at him.

 

* * *

 

You sat with your brothers, listening to them bicker over who should be the leader of the great army. When Ivar proposed himself, you scoffed, shaking your head. You conceded to Björn taking the command of the great army, you had so from the beginning. You knew your younger brothers resented you slightly, as you agreed with Björn’s words.

“What about Bragi?”

“What about Bragi? He can contribute to my decisions, because he’s seen what I have. He doesn’t try to challenge me at every turn.

“You know you have never fought Björn on anything.” Ivar pointed out, pointing his knife at you.

“Why would I need to? I'm not as bloodthirsty as you Ivar. I have seen what he has seen.” You shrugged, crossing your arms over you chest. “I have no reason to fight with him, he’s  _ my brother _ .”

“Maybe it's because your loyalties are spilt, and you're too busy being a bitch to King Harald Finehair and his brother.” He jeered at you.

“Don't you try and challenge me Ivar. Maybe I was too soft with you when you were growing up. But I am not Björn, or Ubbe or Hvitserk or Sigurd. I do not care about keeping our brotherly bonds together, I do not care for you or your cruelty. Because if after we avenge our father and you challenge me again, I will kill you without hesitation, you'd do best to remember that.” You waved your knife at him, eyes narrowed. “You know where my loyalties lie. All of you do.” Your hand wrapped around the armring your father had given you. “It lies with our father, and with Björn, and anyone else I see fit to be loyal to.”

  
  


* * *

 

 

The journey was one you'd travelled many many times before. You stood with your brothers, as requested by Björn, on his ship instead of travelling with Harald and Halfdan. Your arrival on the coast made you vibrate with excitement as the armies gathered. You asked Björn where were you to lead. You glanced over at Halfdan and Harald longingly.

“Go.” Björn sighed. “Go to them. I heard what you said to Ivar.” He clapped your shoulder. “I know you stayed loyal to me because you loved me, you are a good brother Bragi.”

You wrapped him in a hug, tightly. “Thank you Björn.” You whispered into his ear, before hefting the shield that Halfdan’s gave you up your arm and jogging over to them.

You marched forward with them between then and your own brothers, grinning widely as you raised your axe above our shoulder, eyes trained on the man that you knew was King Aelle, standing at the head of the miniscule army ahead of you. As Björn shouted your father's name, you roared, charging forward towards them.

The fight barely lasted a moment, before your brothers had strung King Aelle by his feet to Ivar’s chariot and dragged him along to where your father was murdered.

You looked into the empty pit, anger welling up in your throat. You helped your brothers prepare the makeshift cross that you nailed King Aelle to, sitting by Ivar as Björn prepared to blood eagle him. His screams seems almost like a symphony to you as you stood, training your eyes onto the motion of Björn, and the axe hacking away at Aelle’s ribcage. Blood, spraying on your faces as the man went silent, whether from shock or the pain you did not know.  

The next morning. You strung him up for all the English to see when they visited your father's grave in search for the defeated king.

 

* * *

 

 

Back at camp you sat with the brothers, listening to Halfdan chastise his brother about his princess and claiming the fickleness of women. When he told his brother that he wasn’t married, you giggled, nudging his hand with yours, brushing your rings together.

“Maybe Bragi might have some advice.” Halfdan nudged you back, putting you on the spot.

“Oh well uh, I wasn’t the one who asked.” You admitted with a small glance to Halfdan. “They asked me, to prove that they loved me. It worked. Although I admit, I was a bit of a coward to ask them myself, even though I wanted to.”

Later that day after you’d moved from Northumbria and set up camp somewhere else, you'd gone to Halfdan’s tent while Harald had gone to see his princess, eager to see him before the next battle, but you heard soft noises from behind the tent as you made to enter. You paused, listening to the hushed voices before you decided to take a chance and push the flaps aside and enter the tent; only to see a shield maiden where you should have been, straddling Halfdans lap and muttering to him, cradling his face. He didn't notice you enter, nor when you left the tent in a hurry your chest aching

You didn't know where you were going, but you managed to bump into Harald on the way. He gripped your shoulders, a hand lifting your face to see your red rimmed eyes.

“Bragi. What happened?” He asked gently, looking down at you. You shook your head, shaking his hand from your cheek.

“It is nothing, I.” Your voice cracked.

“Come, we can talk about it in my tent, or we can wallow in some misery with some ale.” He offered, placing an arm about cross your back and guiding you away

You didn't notice a disheveled and shocked Halfdan watching you being led away by his brother.


	13. Chapter 13

“So what has gotten you so upset hmm?” You were asked as Harald held out a cup of ale to you. “Has something happened? Someone been unkind to you?”

You pursed your lips and took and drink of ale. You let out the breath you were holding. “Like you it seems, that I have no luck with promises.”

Harald sat down beside you, placing a hand down beside you. You wondered how you could tell him why you were upset without giving it away that it was his brother.

“I was reunited recently, with my love,” You began softly. “We’ve been separated from each other for a while a while, since I returned to Kattegat from Vestfold.” You felt a ball of sadness get stuck in your throat. “We only got married a few days ago, but I... I just saw them with someone else.”

Harald sighed, wrapping an arm around your shoulder around rubbing it kindly.

“Are you sure that it was them, that you did not mistake either party.” He asked.

“I went to their tent. I don't think they saw me come in… or leave.” You shook your head and brushed the tear that escaped you with the back of your hand.

“I'm so sorry Bragi.” He gave you a soft smile. “If you want them dead I'm sure Halfdan would be happy to help me, or you, kill them.”

You gave him a wet laugh at the mention of Halfdan’s name, your tears freely falling. “I don't think you can kill them Harald.”

He nudged your shoulder. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders. “Don’t cry Bragi. I like seeing you happy, you have always been a breath of fresh air to my brother and I.” He patted your back. “I'm glad Björn lets you march with us.”

“As if Björn could stop me.” You laughed. “Thank you, Harald.” You pressed your forehead to his gently. “For the offer and the ale. But I should probably return to my tent. We wouldn't want others getting the wrong idea huh.”

Harald chuckled and patted your cheek. “Stay, at least until you're settled. Let people think what they think, all that matters is that you are alright.

“You are more surprising every day.” You said to him as you lifted your eyes to the awnings of his tent.

“I'm glad that I am not so predictable.” You laughed at that.

“I don't think you or Halfdan have been predictable since you arrived to sail with my father to Paris.” You let yourself fall back onto Harald's bed, eyes closing for a moment, feeling older than you were for a moment, you savoured the silence as Harald didn't respond. “I truly thought they loved me Harald. We got married before we sailed from Kattegat I think it was the happiest night of my life.”

You felt him pat your thigh and you heard what sounded like him pouring another cup of ale.

“You didn’t tell me, but I guess perhaps we were both not meant for love, eh Bragi?” He offered you the second cup before pouring one of his own before sitting down next to you and falling onto his back, laughing somewhat wetly next to you.

That night, after sharing a few (read: many) more cups of ale with King Harald, you stumbled back to your own tent, brushing off concerned words from Björn and Ubbe as they noticed your red rimmed eyes and tear tracked face. When Ubbe pushed for answers, you turned and roared in his face, throwing the cup you'd taken with you at him, it smacking him in the forehead. You didn't care that you made a scene in the middle of camp. As you shrugged off their stares you made it back to your tent, pushing through the flaps to find Halfdan already waiting with his own mead, hair covering his face.

“Did you enjoy drinking with my brother?” He asked as you dropped the flap to your tent. You didn't respond as he leaned back, an arm outstretched against your bed as he took a sip of his drink. “Did you comfort him over his Princess’ betrayal? Hmm?” He stood up from where he was sitting and you ducked your eyes, unable to look at him, going about putting your axe in a crate next to the entrance of your tent.

“Answer me!” He scrambled to his feet, yanking your face and pulling it to look at him, grabbing your throat with his free hand.

You grabbed his hand and wrenched it away from you, shoving him aside and watching him stumble. “He cried and I cried and we drank. That's all your brother and I did. Why would you care anyway?” You said calmly, taking off your cloak and dumping it unceremoniously into the corner of the tent.

“Why would I care?” Halfdan repeated incredulously. “Because I am with you, because we’re married! I spent a decade loving you behind closed doors and in secret only to have you spend what should have been our time together, drinking with my brother!”

You rolled your eyes and stepped closer to him, spitting your words harshly at him. “Maybe you should have thought about that before inviting whatever whore you had to your tent when I was supposed to come see you. It’s hypocritical of you to be jealous Halfdan.”

“Whore? What whore Bragi?” He grabbed your arm, eyes searching your face. As the realization dawned on him he shook his head and began rambling. “No no you don't understand she came in from nowhere. I had no idea of who she was and she, she kissed me Bragi. I did not want her.” You shook your head and let our a deep breath, yanking your arm away from him to sit on your bed.

“Bragi please.”

You lifted your head to meet his eyes. Halfdan looked distraught, as he stared down at you wide eyed. He cupped your cheek gently and pressed his forehead to yours while whispering. “I promise. That wasn't what I was doing, I pushed her off and kicked her out as soon as I realized what was happening please Bragi.” He climbed into your lap, one hand still cupping your cheek, his forehead still pressed to yours as he wrapped his free arm around your shoulders.

You let out a soft sob against him, wrapping your arms around his waist. “I believe you Halfdan.” You whispered, rubbing your noses together. You hugged him close. “Remember our night in the woods, in Kattegat. I promised to tell you something.”

He nodded against you, his chest rising and falling against yours. You closed your eyes and took a breath to steady yourself. “I may love my brothers Halfdan, but I know in my heart that I was meant to love you and be with you. That in the end, I would always choose you.” You didn’t say it to him often, out of the fear that someone would hear you, someone would recognize just how deeply you meant those words and your secrecy and your safety would have been shattered.

Halfdan pulled away to look at your face, stained with tears and your eyes squeezed shut.  “Oh my beautiful prince.” He cradled your face gently, leaning in, to kiss you softly and sweetly. He urged you to lay back as he pressed soft kisses to your face, smiling down at you as you stared at him with wide eyes. You never wanted to take your eyes away from him. His usually wide and manic eyes were soft, crinkled with smile lines as he leaned in to pepper your face and throat with kisses, resting against you, his arms caging you against the bed. His hair brushed against your cheek as he trailed the kisses down your throat, across your shoulders and collarbones before he lifted his head. “I love  _ you, _  I don't want anyone else . ”

 

* * *

 

“Can I keep you?” Halfdan whispered to you as he walked with you, a subtle hand placed at your elbow. You'd fallen back to your usual banter after yesterday's drama, having all confusion cleared up. It did help that Halfdan had found the same shieldmaiden in the middle of the night and had helped you slit her throat.

Once the camp was settled you joined the brothers for a meal, enjoying your chicken. Harald told Halfdan you were married, thinking he didn’t know about it. Halfdan feigned surprise, congratulating you and teasing you, asking if they were ever going to meet your mystery woman. You laughed at him, and Harald when he voiced the same opinion.

“The day I introduce my mystery woman to you is the day when I know either of you won’t steal her with your charms and good looks.” You teased them, playing along with Halfdan’s joke. “Afterall. What am I compared to the both of you?” You gestured to all of the both of them.

“You just gestured to, all of us?” Harald tilted his head in slight confusion.

“It’s a compliment brother.” Halfdan laughed as he bit into his chicken. “He’s saying that all of you is a good competition.” He said with a full mouth. “Does this mean I understand men better than you too.”

Harald flicked his spoon at him, flicking the broth all over the both of you. You yelped and tossed a small piece of bread at him, nailing him right on the nose. Harald clutched his nose dramatically, while crowing in an overdramatized strained voice. “I’ve been hurt, my heart is broken, how could you betray me Bragi?” You and Halfdan laughed at that and you playfully kicked Harald from under the table.

“Watch it, your men might take you seriously. I don’t want one of them sneaking into my tent to kill me at night.” You warned, continuing to stack some meat on a piece of bread in attempt to make a massive sandwich.

“If you ever betrayed me Bragi I’d have to ask Halfdan to kill you. You’re too important for anyone else to do it.” He murmured between slurps. “Although if you were to betray me then I think I’d have lost the favour of the gods. Huh?”

You shook your hair, leaning over to smack the side of Harald’s head. “Excuse me how dare you imply that I’d betray you.” You heard your ring smack against a clasp in his hair. “Harald the only time I’d ever go against you is if you were going to do something incredibly stupid, you know it.”

“With you and Halfdan around to protect me…” He lifted his attention fully from his food. “I think I would never make mistakes again.”

You shook your head and slammed your foot onto his, you and Halfdan laughing when he jumped, knocking his knees against the table. “You’re insane Harald.”

Harald’s princess approached the table while you were laughing and eating interrupting your banter. Halfdan grimaced and shot a look at you, then his brother. She looked down at the three of you, before meeting Harald’s eyes.

“Can I talk to you?” She asked, quietly enough for only you three to hear. Halfdan glanced at his brother, shaking his head slightly. Harald wiped his mouth and stood,  going with her to his tent. Halfdan finished his chicken and stood, taking his time walking over to his brothers tent. He gestured for you to come with him. You stood and followed. You could hear Harald grunting from inside the tent before Halfdan ducked in with his sword drawn.

“Seems like after all I know women a lot better than you,  brother.” You heard him say, seeing him wipe his sword on his sleeve, before sheathing it and leaving his tent.

You reached for Halfdan's hand and linked your pinkie finger with his as you walked back to your table to finish your meals, eyes trained on the table as Harald reappeared to finish his broth.

 

* * *

 

The morning of the battle arrived, and you stared down your enemies alongside your brothers, hoping that Ivars change in tactics would work as planned.

You ran, back and forth as instructed by the horns blown by Floki, standing firm next to Halfdan, watching his chest rise and fall beneath the weight of his armour. You smiled, as you caught the frustrations of the English soldiers, from their stances, and the yelling from who you recognized to be King Ecbert’s son, Prince Aethelwulf.

As they fell immediately for your trap, you raced with the brothers to met Björn and block them from reaching your ships. As your brother called for a shield wall, you grinned and lifted your shield next to Harald's, giving Halfdan a nudge with your elbow, with a grin on your face that could have only been rivalled by Ivars.

You waited for Björn to give the order, as the English men began to charge towards you, your brother yelled, and you and your folk barreled forward, axes and shields raised, ready for the fight. You watched Haldan back, blocking swords meant for his back with your shield, hacking away at soldiers with all your might, roaring and screaming at them throughout the madness and chaos. As Ivar and Floki lead the second wave of men, you heard yells of retreat from the soldiers, cheering in victory of the battle. You searched for Björn among the survivors, clutching the side of his face and pressing your forehead to his. You cheered with your other brothers and the men and shield maidens around you.

Halfdan picked you up by your waist and spun you around. before dropping you to your feet and pressing his forehead to yours. “Look at you my prince.” He muttered to you, his face glowing beneath the splatters of blood around you.

You chuckled and pulled him closer by the back of his neck. “Gods I love you.” You told him softly.

The Great Army carried on, spearheaded by your brothers as you progressed towards where Ivar claimed King Ecbert’s estate to be. You all charged towards the estate, roaring and cheering, your steps sounding like an ominous clash of thunder above you, only to find the estate empty. You followed Halfdan and Harald as they went to scout the inner estate, to find nothing but dust and dirt in your wake

“It's empty!” Halfdan declared. “They've gone!”

Your brothers began to set fire to most things they saw, wrecking most furniture and and anything that even looked like it was worshiping the Christian god.

You'd found a fair few treasures among the abandoned estate, fingers snatching up an armring from a chest be free it was all looted and taken away. You intended on giving it to Halfdan when you had the chance.

As your men parted,  Halfdan held his sword to an old man dressed in white.

“This is King Ecbert. I order you to spare him.” Björn ordered, as King Eckert reached out and touched his chest.

You found yourself a secluded corner to lay in Halfdan's lap, smiling at him as your produced the armring you stole for him. “For you, my heart.” You murmured to him. He smiled, singing softly into your ear a song you did not recognize. He smiled down at you, soft, gentle and sweet, something special surrounding the both of you. You slide the armring onto his arm, linking your hand in his. You sat there for a few hours, just pressing kisses to each other, basking in the glow of victory with some mead until you were forced to jump apart by Floki who had come looking for the two of you, Björn wanting you to present for negotiations with King Ecbert. You pressed a kiss to Halfdan’s forehead, nudging his cheek before scrabbling to your feet and smiling at Floki, nodding.

Floki led you over to where Björn was gathered with the rest of your brothers, Floki leaving you in the doorway, patting your shoulder before you entered, giving Björn a nod.

“We have to decide what to do with King Ecbert.”

“I don't understand. What is there to discuss, we blood eagle him. Ecbert is as guilty as Aelle. So we should do the same to him.”

You sighed as Ivar began another rant.

“We understand those feelings Ivar, no one is denying what you are saying.” Björn snapped at him. “But sometimes, sometimes we have to consider things beyond our feelings and we have to consider what is best, for our people!”

“I know what the people want, and they want what I want.” You sighed.

“We should just kill him and get this over with.” You added “We came here to avenge our father and and we have done half of that by killing Aelle, let us cut a deal and then kill him.”

“We have to consider our position of strength and use that to our ultimate advantage!”

You ignored their bickering and stood, circling the cage that held King Ecbert, when he rattled his chains you looked up at him. Björn spoke to him, as you watched his movements.

After the king's proposal, you gave the responsibility of dealing with with to Björn. You were present when you witnessed the deal being brokered by the king, as he pressed his seal into the wax. You felt Halfdan pat your side, technically, your quest for revenge now finally over.

You went in search for Floki after the deal, hearing about Helga death, only to come across him lamenting to Björn, promising to give himself to the sea. When Floki stood you ducked back into the corridor, hidden from his view. You retreated from inside the estate in search of Halfdan.

 

At the celebratory feast, you sat by Björn's left hand, biting into your piece of meat, ignoring your brothers squabbles as you met Halfdan's eyes over the tables, winking at him. You spun your ring on your finger when Björn blew his horn, standing to make a toast, playing to the crowd.

Unfortunately I will not be here to see this new settlement grow and thrive.” Your brother began. “My fate will take me elsewhere. I always knew I had to return tor explore the Mediterranean and now I feel free to follow my destiny, with my brother, Bragi, coming with me. But, my other brothers will be here for you.” He raised his drinking horn. “Skol!”

You rolled your eyes and Ivar began talking more attacks and raids. Squabbling with your siblings again and again.

“Don't do this Ivar, we're all the sons of Ragnar we need to drink together.” Your younger brother leaned forward in his chair.

“Frankly dear Sigurd, I don't care what you have to say, and truthfully I wouldn't even piss down your throat if your lungs were on fire.”

You frowned, sitting forward.

“So who would like to stay and farm?” Björn asked, changing the subject.

“I would like...to stay.” Harald began, “But I have other plans.”

“As for me,” You met Halfdan's eyes. “I want to go with Bragi and Björn, I want to see the Mediterranean.”

You broke out into large grin, and you leapt over the table with Björn to step down and embrace Halfdan.

“Now it seems that the only thing that kept the sons of Ragnar together was the death of their father.” Björn lamented as you pulled Halfdan into and hug, patting his back.

You drew your axe when Ivar flung his own into Sigurds stomach. The only thing that held you back from charging at Ivar was Halfdan wrapping his arms around your arms and tugged you back.

“Bragi! Bragi no!” Halfdan was in your ear, muttering and murmuring to you.

“I told you not to challenge me Ivar that didn't mean kill your brother! You crossed the line!” You yelled at him. “Sigurd was right! You are crazy!” Halfdan still kept his grip on you. “I will kill you for this Ivar. Just you wait.” You muttered as Halfdan rubbed his hands across your arms in an attempt to calm you down.

At Sigurds funeral, you stood next to Halfdan as he judged Ivar, as you all did. But you only had eyes on your baby brother. After the funeral your brothers, King Harald and Halfdan gathered into one of the houses near the courtyard, eyeing Ivar with distrust. You stood next to Halfdan as Ivar defended his actions, the older man with an arm placed on your elbow.

“Anger overcame me and I wasn't thinking. I am truly sorry.” Ivar didn’t look bothered at all when he apologized, gesturing with his arms.

“You have, always attacked Sigurd.” You growled. “You've always hurt him. You are not sorry.”

Ivar glared at you before crawling out of his chair like a petulant child, and away from all of you.

“You cannot leave him in charge of the Great Army.” Ubbe moved closer to the table.

“That is your affair Ubbe, You're his big brother. You take charge. I told you this is none of my concern.” Ubbe turned to look at you. You shrugged. “I plan to return to the Mediterranean with Bragi, and Halfdan.”

“What can I do? I'm going with Björn, you know I have a no love for Ivar, and I was never close to the either of you, Hvitserk, Ubbe. I loved Sigurd. If I stay, I will kill Ivar and none of you will stop me. And I don’t want to kill my siblings. I’m not him.” You frowned and leaned closer to Halfdan.

“Will you return first to Kattegat?” Harald asked.

“I have no intention of doing that. My fate, our fate is too urgent.”

“Then I will go there and tell them of our victories, avenging your father's deaths, the defeat of the Saxons and the great gift of land to our piece.” Harald offered.

“Tell our mother that we are both safe, and Torvi and the children then, that I think of them and that we will return. If the gods will it.” Your brother asked.

“I will.” Björn left the room, leaving Harald to look questioningly at his brother about his decision.

* * *

You were standing with Halfdan when Harald approached him. You kept your eyes averted when he spoke.

“You are sure? I don't understand why you want to split with me. We're brothers, we belong together. We've always had the same dream.”

“No, that's your dream. You want to be King of Norway. I don't have a dream about being the brother of the King of Norway.” Halfdan sighed.

“Then what is your dream.”

You missed Halfdan glancing at you before he replied to his brother.

“I want to travel.”

“I mean what is your ambition?”

“You have ambition enough for the both of us brother. I'm a simple fellow. Travelling to the ends of the known world, following my heart, that's enough for me.” Halfdan admitted. “That’s all I want brother.”

“I will miss you, everyone needs a brother to cover their back.” You thought Harald sounded like he was going to cry. You hadn’t witnessed him like this, not even when he confronted his princess.

“I will still do that, wherever I am.” Halfdan pulled him him into an embrace. Both of them sounded like they were going to cry.

As he pulled away from his brother, he patted your arm, signalling you that you were ready, and he moved with a hand on your lower back.

“Go to your new boyfriends! Be happy together!” You both turned around to look around Harald, eyes wide in concern.

Your brother patted your shoulder. “Tides are turning. We have to leave.” You followed Halfdan and he stepped into the ship, excited for the new adventures that were about to unfold.

  
  


* * *

It was only the first week into the journey and Halfdan and you had carved yourself your own corner on the boat, separated by your shields and your blankets piled together to make a nest. Your excuse to Björn was that Halfdan radiated so much heat at night you thought you could steal some, being somewhat a cold blooded creature. You assumed he bought the excuse as he laughed and called Halfdan over to ask him how much of a leach you were and whether he was used to waking up with so much hair in his face. Halfdan took the jokes in his stride, ruffling your hair and playfully calling you a leach, complaining about you stealing his blankets at night.

It made your heart warm to see Björn and Halfdan getting along so well despite you hiding your relationship from him.

“Why did you really decide to come with me.” Your brother asked Halfdan as the three of you gathered around a fire, Halfdan had a hand on yours, hidden. beneath the fur of his coat, a risky move while sitting next to your brother, but it offered you some comfort against the dark seas and the warming air

“Why did you go into the wilderness?” Halfdan responded, looking down at the fire. “You had something to prove. So do I.

“What do you want to achieve?”

“My brother loves fame more than I do. I just want to live, but I want to live with the greatest intensity, I want to feel every part of my life as long it lasts.” He chuckled to himself. “I want to be more than just alive, If you know what I mean.” He gave you a small glance before you were interrupted by Sindric.

“But I will feel naked.” Your brother protested at Sindric's advice.

“Better naked than dead.” You shook your head Sindric.

You didn't much trust the wanderer, but your brother did so you let his advice slide. You settled in closer to Halfdan under the guise of leaning in over to pat your brother on the shoulder. You smiled as Halfdan rubbed his hand across your thigh beneath his coat, you felt at ease away from your brothers squabbling, at the prospect of this new land.

You and Halfdan listened, to more arrangements your brother made with Sindric's advice. You leaned over Halfdans back, your braid falling over your shoulder and dangling against Halfdans face. You turned your head to look at Björn as he spoke, subtly brushing your nose against Halfdans cheek as you did so.   
"I can't believe Harald called my brother your boyfriend." It made Halfdan blanch and then shudder against you. Björn found it funny that you clung to Halfdan during the night, teasing you for leaching his warmth.

When Björn finally fell asleep, the cover night granted you complacency and recklessness in your affections, kissing Halfdan with you cheeks flushed. Halfdan was plain about his affection towards you, pressing kisses to your forehead and cheek. You felt guilty for hiding your relationship with Halfdan. It bothered you to pretend, and to hide, to lie to your brother, but you didn't want to risk Björn abandoning the both of you, especially now, in the middle of the sea where you’d never been before.

The next morning, you approached a cliffside. “Björn.” Halfdan shook your brother. “Björn wake up.” You stood next to Halfdan as he leaned against the mast, as your brother praised the gods

“Sicily.” Sindric’s said to you, before your brother asked to change course, towards the direction of the tempting island Sindric dangled in front of your brother


	14. Chapter 14

You approached Sicily, your hand on Halfdans back as the ships sailed closer to the shore

“When we go ashore in the morning, remember we are traders.” Sindric reminded the three of you. You let go of the breath you were holding and kept your eyes trained on the shoreline.

Sicily was warm, the sand and rocks on your feet felt like it was burning through your boots. As you approached the city by horse, you were taken aback by the vast emptiness of sand and  land. You entered the city, dismounting your horse as Björn did, eyes being dragged in every direction by the colours that the people wore. As a man walked down from a tent on a balcony with a throne, above you, he spoke to Sinric in a language you didn't understand, before drawing his sword on your brother. Björn disarmed him easily, returning his sword when he began to laugh almost maniacally.

As much as you didn’t want to give away you’d practically plastered yourself to Halfdan’s back, fingers touching and sticking to his neck, brushing at the sweat that gathered underneath the scarf that the guides taught you to wrap around your heads.

That night you, your brother and Halfdan met with Commander Euphemius, and you noted the look on your Björns face as the Commander placed a kiss on his cheek. Halfdan hooked his foot against yours, smirking at the look that Björn gave the two of you. You noticed the look Halfdan gave your brother, something a little darker than he’d given your brother. Halfdan’s attention was dragged away from your brother as the woman to your left began to sing. You inched closer to him, your eyes glancing around at the commanders men. As the fires flickered around you, you watched as Halfdan was enamoured by the song that she sang. He let his hand to lay next to yours, fingers brushing yours gently against your own, tracing over your ring, before giving you a soft look. You intertwined your fingers with his, giving him a quick wink and a softer smile.

Later, when you retired to the tents provided by the Commander, you sat amongst silks, stretching your body over the soft fabrics. Halfdan pushed into your tent, once almost everyone had turned in for the night. He looked so different in these clothes, loose and bright, warm colours made his soften. It didn’t help that the lack of layers showed off the build of his frame, the surprising amount of bulk he had beneath his armour. You thought it was funny, the face Björn made when he realized that Halfdan wasn’t actually as skinny and lean as he thought he was. You smiled as the orange flames lit up his face and made him glow. He entered your tent, stepping onto the silk before falling onto his knees and crawling over to you, pressing his forehead against yours, laying his body over yours.

“I would follow you, wherever you would go.” He murmured to you. “You are my heart and my soul.”

Your smile grew wider at the admission, and hooked your legs through his, pulling him as close to you as he could. “And you're mine.” You whispered, your arms slinging around his waist. “I'm glad you decided to come with me. And that you're supporting Björn. I’m glad we got married.” He only nodded against you, grazing his lips upon your cheek and pulling you close to him, rolling onto his side. You traced the scar across his neck, and the tattoos on his face gently.

You both fell asleep like that, embraced and curled around each other.

The next morning you stood amongst the ramparts with your brother and Halfdan, as he carved into the soft limestone a rune you didn't recognize with your hand around his shoulders. You frowned when Sinric revealed that Commander Euphemius wasn't really the commander here at all, and a man named Ziyadat Allah was truly in charge. Halfdan held his knife to Sinric’s throat, only pulling away when Björn gestured to him. Halfdan returned to carving his rune, blowing away the dust when he was done.

“I want to meet this Ziyadat Allah.” Björn suggested.

“Why?” Halfdan asked, eyeing your brother.

“Because it seems that he is the true leader.” Your brother said like it was plainly obvious.

He turned to you, slipping his hand into yours as you both walked behind Björn and Sinric, discussing the possibilities of how and what could happen if you travelled to go see this Ziyadat Allah. You couldn’t help leaning into Halfdan, pressing your lips to the skin of his collarbones showing.

You, Sinric, Björn and Halfdan approached Commander Euphemius about travelling to see Ziyadat Allah. When Sinric let you know that Kassia was the reason he changed his mind, from denying you his company in his travels, to the both of them travelling with you, your eyes narrowed in suspicion and you really wondered what kind of power that this woman had.

 

* * *

 

The boats you travelled with were smaller than your own, but it was cushioned and it looked a lot more comfortable than your boats as you sat between your brother and Halfdan, squinting as the sun beat down on your pale skin and left it slightly reddened. When you arrived, you had to ride camels instead of horses, towards the Ziyadats camp which was set in the expense of nothingness that was the dessert around you. You did not like the sand, or how it blew into your eyes, how grainy it was. It hurt when it got into your eyes, it got stuck to your boots and was everywhere no matter how hard you tried to get rid of it. Despite the heat during the day, the temperature dropped below freezing at night, and you were thankful you packed your furs on the trip with you as you spread them out over the sand, laying in them, curling up with Halfdan and your brother for warmth.

When you had arrived in the camp, it looked so much more different than you expected. You were invited into the main tent, being served drinks by servents. You were surprised when the man greeted you in your own language, welcoming you to his camp. Halfdan looked terrified that he could speak your language since he’d only just whispered to you something only meant for your ears. You didn't expect that, nor did you expect the man's hospitality nor did you expect the freedom he had given you despite you being Commander Euphemius’ bodyguards.

“You are Björn Ironside?”

“Yes.”

“And these?” He gestured to you, Halfdan and Sindric.

“Halfdan the Black.” Your brother introduced. “Bragi Lothbrok, my brother, and Sindric the Wanderer.”

Björn asked the man how he could speak your language, and you remember Sindric mentioning he has met many vikings before.

“That is easy, I’ve met Rus Vikings from the Kievan empire. I have been pleased to help them with the emperor.”

“Are you not the enemy of the emperor?” Halfdan asked, tilting his head.

“By no means, why? Why should I seek such an enemy?” Your brother and Halfdan turned their heads to look at Commander Euphemius, while you kept your gaze on Ziyadat Allah as he frowned. You recognized that look as a epiphany,

“Ah, there are many things you do not understand about how the world works here. If you take my advice,  you will just take it as it appears, that is the best way.” You met Halfdan's eyes, before flicking them to Ziyadat Allah raising an eyebrow.

“Now we have about trade deal to make. How can I get furs, swords, falcons, bear skins, whale meat, and your slaves are the best. Everyone knows that.” He clapped. “We Arabs pride ourselves on our hospitality, so if there's anything I can do to make to make stay here more comfortable or more pleasant, please do not be afraid to ask.”

After your initial meeting with Ziyadat Allah, you were taken to a set of joined tents, each one separated by a cloth and beaded curtain. Your brother frowned when he noticed only two tents connected to the main one, with a sitting area, full of silks and blankets and pillows.

“One of us can take the main room, since Sinric has his own tent?” Björn suggested, gesturing to the nest of pillows and silks. You shrugged, sharing a subtle glance with Halfdan.

“I’m sure Bragi wouldn't mind sharing with me.” Halfdan offered, giving Björn charming smile, inching closer to you. “We've already been used to sharing our blankets on the journey, I wouldn't mind.”

“If you're sure?”

“It’s not a problem for me Björn, and I don’t think I want to be in your tent if you find a slave girl to enjoy.” You teased him.

Later in the evening, you sat with your brother and Halfdan, leaning against the hookah that they had given you, blowing smoke from your nose and mouth as you felt giddy and hazy. You were acutely aware of your arm strewn behind Halfdan's back, and him leaning into you, his breath hot against your cheek, but you couldn't tell if Björn noticed how close you were to him, or the glances and looks you sent his way and the hand you slipped under his tunic to tease the skin of his stomach and hips.

Sindric entered the tent, carrying a small box, and followed by a woman, making you jump and pull your hand away from Halfdan.

“The Emir has offered you gifts. The box,” He held it forward to you and Halfdan. Halfdan leaned forward and got up, taking it from him and sitting back down beside you. “Is for the two of you, and she, is for you.” He gestured to Björn. “Enjoy.”

Björn looked at the both of you, and the box before getting up and giving you both a playful, encouraging kick, before he led his woman into his tent.

You however, leaned over and opened the box Halfdan held, seeing a vial, and two armrings. You glanced at Halfdan, curious, before it occurred to you that maybe Ziyadat Allah knew your secret, from the moment he laid eyes on you. You weren’t really hiding the looks you gave each other when you were in their presence and how close you’d press yourself to Halfdan’s back, so used to Björn thinking that it was just how close you two were as friends. You lifted the jewelry from the box, slowly sliding one of the armrings up Halfdan's arm, to rest next to the one you gave him in Vestfold all those years ago, and the one you stole from King Ecbert’s villa, as you looked him in the eyes. He took the other one and gently pushed it up your forearm, to rest it next to your father's armring and the one he gave you in Algeciras.

He took the vial and uncapped it, sniffing it before dabbing a bit of the oil onto his fingers. “It tingles.” He murmured. You tilted your head curiously and he pressed his fingers against your lips, and they began to tingle as well.

“Maybe,” You said softly as to not pique Björns curiosity. “We should make use of our gift.” You smiled before slipping out of your tunic and the pants they had given you, kicking your boots off in the direction of your shared tent, before grabbing the vial from Halfdan and laying back, spreading your legs to him. He laughed, the same rasp that you loved to hear as he shimmied out of his own clothes and crawled on top of you.

“Do you want me to take you?” He asked.

You nodded and grinned as he drizzled the oil onto his fingers, rubbing them rother before reaching down to rub at your hips, taking your cock into his hand and teasing you. You whimpered, grabbing at Halfdan's hips. His hand left your cock, still slippery with the oil as he began to massage your ass,  smiling down at your pleasantly. “Look at you my perfect prince, my husband.” He murmured, teasing you with his fingers, you clenched your muscles as the tingles began to spread with a distracting sensation. Halfdan grinned and leaned back for a moment, drizzling the oil onto the palm of his hands before grasping his own cock and coating it. He capped the vial and put it aside, before grabbing your hip with his free hand and lifting your legs above his shoulders. He began to push into you slowly, gasping as you scratched down his back, the burn causing you to arch yours.

“Halfdan!” You moaned, louder than you wanted. He laughed and reached a hand up to cover your mouth before he began to thrust, covering the sounds that tried to escape as he panted against his hand. The sensation from the oil and the heat of sinking into you made his heart race. He slid his hand off of your mouth only to cover it with his, murmuring against your lips as he settled into a steady rhythm of thrusting into you. You lifted your hips to make it easier on him, your legs crooked over his shoulders. You smiled against his mouth.

“God's Halfdan-” You gasped, with each thrust against something inside you that sent shocks up your spine. He began to move faster, pulling his hand away from the side of your face to grip your throat, the hold gentle, but the action itself caused your breath to catch in your throat. You dropped your legs from his shoulders and wrapped them around his waist.

“Halfdan please! Harder!” You pleaded against him, hands scratching hard and deliberately at his sides and back. Halfdan roared at that, shoving you with each thrust, leaning in to bite your shoulder hard enough to draw blood. You screamed at that, the action taking you off guard.

“Shh shh!” Halfdan soothed against your lips. “We don't want to attract your brother.” He murmured as he continued.  Your eyes focused on the tattoos on his face, one of your hands trembling as you cupped his cheek, fingers tracing them.

You nodded against him, as he pulled away slightly to loo at you. “I would keep you, if you allowed me.”

“I wouldn't want to be kept by anyone else.” You promised.

You met his eyes, emotions plain behind yours, and his. He stopped thrusting for a moment, just staring down at you, before gingerly rolling the both of you over and pulling you snuggly into his lap, his hands firm on your hips as he thrust into you, your moans unhindered as Halfdan gasped and roared beneath you, your hands dragging your nails across his chest. You forgot about keeping quiet as he held you above him and thrust into you, his lips twisted into the same smile he had when he was on the battlefield as his voice, and yours, got louder.

 

* * *

 

The next morning you both woke up before Björn and separated from the messy tangle that you both had fallen asleep in last night, your clothes forgotten and tossed aside, the vial you received tucked safely away into a pouch at your belt. You both put on your clothes, before lounging next to each other as servants entered with what you thought was maybe tea or some kind of local drink and some southern wines, and food and fruits for you. Björn walked in as you were tasting their drinks, after they had sat everything down and left the main tent.

“How was your evening?” Halfdan asked your brother as he walked in.

Your brother clicked his tongue. “Very satisfactory.” He sighed as he dropped down into the cushions and tucked a pillow between his legs.

“By the gods, Björn, put your pants on.” You threw what you thought was a cherry at him.

“And yours? What was in that box?”

“Uh..” You hesitated in responding.

“It was a few pretty trinkets.” Halfdan lifted his arm to show Björn the armring. “Nothing else.”

You nervously chewed on another piece of fruit as Björn leaned forward. “You know I wondered why Ziyadat Allah did not bring you your own women to celebrate… then I heard a few interesting things last night.” Your brother began, picking through the plates of food. “How long have you been sleeping with my baby brother Halfdan?” He asked curiously, picking up a piece of bread.

You didn't know how to respond, as Halfdan looked nervously between the two of you. Your brother met your eyes, raising his eyebrows at you. “Hmm?” When neither of you responded, he sat up, gesturing to Halfdan. “How long have you been taking advantage of my brother?”

“We’ve  _ been together _ since Paris.” Halfdan said, stressing the words. Your brother turned his head to you as if he was trying to confirm it. 

“What?” Björn frowned.

“You heard.” Halfdan rolled his shoulders, cracking his neck.  

“He’s not taking advantage of me Björn.” You frowned, straightening your back. “You think I’d let that happen to myself?”

“No.” Your bother sighed. “Why did you hide it?”

“We didn't know… if anyone would be okay with it.” You shuffled closer to Halfdan. “Floki warned us that not everyone would be happy if they knew we were together Either way, we’re married Björn, in the eyes of the gods, we’re bound.”

“I only wish you trusted me with this.” He gave you a smile before chuckling. “How does it work then?” He asked curiously. Halfdan chuckled and shook his head. “Which one of you was? And when was the wedding?” He gestured with his finger. You couldn't help the redness in your face as you ducked to hide it in the crook of Halfdan's shoulder. “Bragi?” He laughed in surprise.

“I’m not as dominant as you think Björn, I like to be taken care of.” You met Halfdan’s eye as you peeked out from his shoulder. “He takes care of me.”

“So you… He puts it in you?” Your cheeks turned as red as a tomato, as Halfdan broke out into laughter, slapping his thigh.

“Björn! I don’t need to tell you this!” You practically shrieked. You slapped Halfdan’s shoulder. “Don’t encourage him Halfdan!”

Your brother laughed at you and your reaction. “I want to know! Tell me.” He insisted, sitting forward even more. “I’m curious. Please.

“It depends.” Halfdan smiled, leaning forward. “On the perspective. Do you want to be taken? Or do you want to do the taking?” Björn looked as if he couldn’t decide which one sounded more appealing to him.

“Which one do you enjoy more Halfdan?” Björn leaned in.

“With  brother? I like doing the taking, but we take our turns.” He slid a hand down your back, dragging his nails lightly along the fabric. “I love your brother, so I am happy with both. He is very sweet, in all ways.”

“Can I?” He hesitated, glancing between the both of you. “Can I watch you two? I want to see how it works?” Halfdan froze with a hand halfway to his mouth, fruit falling out of his fingers. He looked thoughtfully over to you, his eyes searching yours.

“What do you say Bragi? Do you want to show your brother?” The hand he kept on your back slid across your side and splayed across your stomach.

“I thought you don’t like to share Halfdan?” You murmured to him.

“I don’t, but you and your brother, I don’t think I mind, I know you love me.” He  pulled his tunic over his head. He slid his hand up your chest and pushed you back, urging you to lay down. “Are you watching Björn?” Halfdan smiled down at you, slipping his hand underneath your tunic pulling it up and over your head. You stretched your arms over your head, arching your back, crossing your wrists. Your brother seemed distracted by the Halfdan’s hands as one gripped your wrists, holding them above your head, while the other roamed your chest, scratching at your skin, pinching your nipples. You rolled your hips as he pushed his thigh between your legs, letting you rut against him. Björn inched closer to the both of you, eyes wide and curious, trained on your reactions.

Halfdan grinned, he reached down to your waist and pulled the vial you were given last night out, drizzling the oil onto his fingers as he thumbed over your nipples and then, slid his hand below the waistband of your pants gripping your cock. You whimpered as the tingling sensation spread across your chest, and where few droplets that spread across your body, and where Halfdan was teasing your cock with his hand. You squeezed your eyes shut as Halfdan moved his hand from your cock to caress your inner thigh, sliding his fingers between the cheeks of your arse, pushing a finger inside you. You gasped and pulled away slightly from the intrusion, your body clenching around Halfdan’s fingers. He shushed the noises that came from your mouth, murmuring to you before mouthing at your chest and at your hips, before biting your hips and leaving red teeth marks in your skin.

A second pair of hands on you caused you to jump, eyes opening as Björn began  to gingerly press his hands against your chest, pinching and scratching where Halfdan had done. You moaned, as Björn moved his hands to replace the grip that Halfdan had on your wrists, holding you down. Halfdan added another finger to you,  making you writhe in both their holds, he pressed his arm across your hips, holding you still as he began to move his hand. You cried out as Halfdan teased you by moving and curling his fingers, pressing them deep inside you. “That’s a good boy.” He murmured to you from between your legs.

He removed his fingers, pulling off your pants and lifting your legs above your shoulder before fumbling with his own pants and shoving them down his thighs, pressing the head of his cock to your arse before pushing into you. Halfdan pressed his lips to your mouth with the first thrust and your eyes rolled into into the back of your head. Halfdan’s smile bright in his eyes as he began to thrust into more steadily, covering your moans and gasps with his mouth. He wrapped a hand around your waist and pulled your body close to him. Björn seemed fascinated, as Halfdan leaned in and mouthed at your cheek and at your jaw. He turned his head to Björn as his hips continued to move.

“Do you like it Björn?” Halfdan smiled at him, reaching out to clasp the back of his head with his hand, pulling him closer to the both of you. “Do you like how your baby brother sounds?” Halfdan teased him, eyeing his expression.

“I..” His eyes snapped to you, writhing on the silks. “He’s beautiful.” Björn gasped. Halfdan pulled him in for a kiss, grinning at his surprise, before pulling away. He turned his attention back to you, your eyes staring up between him and Björn. His thrusts were firm and deliberate, causing you to gasp with each one.

“Go on then.” Halfdan urged, pushing Björn towards you. “Do the same to him.” Your brother left your chest alone, cupping the back of your head, eyes meeting yours.

“Do you trust me little brother?” He asked you, his voice low and unsteady.

“Please?” You rolled your hips against Halfdans. “ Please?” Halfdan chuckled, pulling his hands beneath your arse and pushing you up, thrusting into you harder. He bit the inside of your thighs, over and over again, breaking the skin at some moments, smiling as you whimpered, whined and moaned and screamed, as Halfdan scraped his tongue and teeth against the beading wounds.

Björn pulled you in for a kiss, his lips rough and bruising against yours. He forced his tongue into your mouth. He slid his hand across your throat, squeezing it. He pulled away when he heard Halfdan groan. He had his eyes trained on the both of you.

“Do you know how you two look?” He gasped, grabbing Björn and pulling him towards him. Halfdan moaned while thrusting into you, changing to more brutal pace, grinning wildly at the noises that came from your mouth. Björn watched wide eyed as your body began to jerk, cupping Halfdan’s cheek and pulling him in for a kiss. You whimpered, clenching around Halfdan, shouting his name as he scratched his nails over the bite marks on your thighs while you came. Halfdan groaned, dropping his hands to your hips and tugged you onto his cock, brutally pounding into you as he forced your legs higher up his shoulders, moaning and panting your name.

He growled your name as he came inside you, dragging his nails over your flesh, digging them into your skin, ripping the first layer of your skin and marking you with red lines over your body. Halfdan dropped his chest to yours, uncaring about the mess, pressing a deep kiss to your lips. “You’re mine.” He murmured to you, scratching his nails across your throat, around Björn’s hands. Björn loosened his grip on your throat, eyes wide, almost like he was in shock. You ached as you stretched, arching your back beneath Halfdan.

You shimmied out from under him, pressing a kiss to the side of his head as you flexed your legs, feeling your joints crack. You crawled over to Björn, pressing your forehead to his. You knelt in front of him, wrapping your other arm around his shoulders. Björn could barely form words, eyes meeting yours. “I didn’t....” Björn whispered. “I didn’t expect it to be so rough.” You swallowed, reaching your arm out towards Halfdan, grabbing him and pulling him close. He seemed in total awe.

“We like it that way.” You smiled at your brother. Halfdan shook out of your grip and  pressed up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder.

Björn nodded, before laying back down on the cushions, propping his hands behind his head. “I liked that. I would enjoy it I think.”

 

 

* * *

 

You'd all fallen asleep in the main tent that night, you flanked by Halfdan and Björn, your arm wrapped around the Halfdan with your head on his chest, and your brother wrapping his arms around you, his chest to your back. You woke up to shouting outside, Halfdan had already gotten up and had his axe and sword ready, Björn was sitting up, his axe in his hands, you scrambled for yours, shakily standing and following Halfdan and Björn as they pushed their way out of the tent.

You saw Ziyadat Allah, yelling in what you now knew was Arabic, at three men kneeling in turbans. Your brother asked Sindric what happened, as you gazed at the men. Ziyadat Allah's soldiers unsheathed their swords as the men began to plead. Halfdan crept over to your brother. “We haven't exactly been the best bodyguards, have we?”

“No we have not.” Your brother murmured. You frowned looking at Kassia, still standing watching the blood pool from the dead men's bodies.

After the scene that morning you were all invited to a feast. There was an abundance of food. “This feast is to celebrate our trade agreement, and our continuing cooperation.” Ziyadat Allah began. “In return for furs, swords, birds of prey and slaves, we are going you give you gold ornaments, silver ornaments, pepper, saffron and silk. As you can see these local spicy and exotic dishes have been especially prepared for you by my famous chefs. They will be insulted if you don't eat your fill.”

As you began to eat, slowly, you appreciated the flavour the peppers and and whatever new spices were used in seasoning the meat. It didn’t even taste half that  bad, the spices made everything a lot more interesting. Halfdan fed you a bite of what he was eating, smiling when you grinned at him, licking his fingers. Ziyadat Allah began speaking to Kassia in Greek, Sindric began to splutter, spitting out the bits of food in his mouth.

“What is he saying?” Your brother asked.

“He's saying that we've all just eaten Commander Euphemius.” Halfdan chuckled, and continued eating either way. You raised an eyebrow at him. Eyes flicking between Halfdan and Björn and Sinric before you shoved the rest of the food you had into your mouth. Food was food.

“I think we should return to the boats. We are in the greatest danger.” Sindric said to you all.

“Ziyadat Allah?”

“No, Kassia. Didn't you realize?” You stood from the feast, as did your brother and Halfdan, retreating back to your tent, keeping your weapons in your hands.

“I knew there was something wrong with that woman.” You growled. “She has too much power.”

You paced, refusing to sit still in your tent as you were no longer bothered by Ziyadat Allah or any of his men. That night you spent laying away with your axe resting against your side, eyes unable to close. Halfdan was much the same, sitting up and watching the entrance with narrowed eyes. You could only think about how Björn was, whether or not it was safe to be alone.

The next morning as the sun beat down on your faces you noticed an increase in warriors surrounding the camp. You and Halfdan approached Björn at the well.

“What are we gonna do?” Halfdan asked. THe three of you turned around when you noticed Ziyadat Allah come out from his tent with Kassia behind him. With a gesture, his men seized you, forcing you to your knees.

“Björn there's a storm coming.”

“A storm?” You looked over to see the sand clouds rolling towards you, just a distance away.

“If we can stay alive for just a few moments longer.”

You all turned to look at Kassia, watching them. As the storm began to roll in she shouted her orders.

“Too late!” Halfdan yelled.

Your brother moved, stabbing a man with the wooden pick he had taken from the pulley of the well, you elbowed the man behind you, hearing him grunt before you launched yourself backward to throw him off his feet. Halfdan and your brother manage to seize swords as the storm rolled in, the sand blinding you.

“Run! Run!” Your brother yelled. You clutched onto Halfdan’s arm when you stumbled through it, stuffing your face into your tunic, headfirst in whatever direction lead you to. “Run!” You stole the camels you rode in on, urging them in a hard run in the direction you came towards your men and the boats. When you had reached a temporary safety at the boats, you grabbed Halfdan, eyeing the blood that smeared across his face, before you realized that it wasn't his own. Your hand ached, the source of the blood.

“Bragi are you okay?” You nodded as you wiped your hand on your tunic. Grabbing a rope with your uninjured hand and began pulled yourself onto the boat, Björn’s men shimmering with curiosity and unasked questions behind their eyes. You knew now that you had to sail back to Kattegat, Björn and you had no choice, if Kassia, such a powerful women wanted you dead and the Emir the man powerful enough to grant her that wish, you could probably never return to the Mediterranean again until they were dead. You glanced at Halfdan, nervous about the outcome of your return back to Kattegat, now that your brother knew about your marriage. He grabbed your hand as soon as you were a good distance away, clicking his tongue as his eyebrow twitched, fingers grazing over the still bleeding slice.

“Seems your luck is slowly running out.” He murmured, pressing his lips to your hand, before pulling away and ripping a strip from his tunic, wetting it with some water before cleaning the wound.

“You’ve never seen me get hurt.” You realized, as he carefully dragged the cloth over the cut. “Have you?”

“You weren’t lucky when you were younger.” Björn said from behind you, catching Halfdan’s attention. “Remember when you took a sword for me?” Your brother patted your head, shaking it playfully in his hand. “Even though you didn’t need to, or when you were were the first to throw yourself up the towers in Paris.”

Halfdan looked at you like you were crazy, accidently pressing into the wound. You hissed and he muttered apologies, gently wrapping your hand with another strip of cloth that Björn handed to him.

“You never did tell us who tortured you while you were healing.” Björn commented, his hand still on your head. “Will you tell me now?”

You ducked your head as Halfdan’s mouth dropped, he looked like he was positively seething, eyes glaring, fingers twitching towards his axe. As if he was shocked that anyone dared to harm a hair on your head.

“He’s already dead, it won’t do any good.” You muttered, clutching your hand to your side, the same side your scar still sat under ink.

“You should tell us anyway. That way when we’re in Valhalla I can torture whichever bastard did that to you.” Halfdan cupped your cheek. “You trust me? Bragi?”

“It… It was Erlendur, and a few of his fathers men.” The hand Björn had playing with your hair stilled. “He had them hold me down and cover my mouth before he held a hot knife to my wound.” Björn tipped your head back to look at him.

“That rat, did that to you.” He looked so angry, the both of them did. “Why?”

“Because Ari kissed me before we went to Northumbria to raid King Alle’s kingdom again.” You admitted, chewing on your bottom lip. “Erlendur said I bewitched him, that it was my fault his brother died, that it was punishment for the gods. He wanted to do more to me, but you and Floki found out before he could.”

“When I get into Valhalla.” Halfdan leaned in to press a kiss to your forehead. “I will torture him until my axe is dripping with his blood, and I can make you happy.”

You chuckled, shaking your head and grabbing his hand with your own. “I’m already happy with you Halfdan. I will always be. I don’t need revenge for that.”

The journey back was horrible for you, along with your hand giving you grief, Halfdan spent most of it curled up next to you, holding you as you felt terribly and deathly ill, almost like you were seasick, an inexperienced child on a boat for the first time in his life. You spent most of the trip vomiting overboard, or shivering in both yours and Halfdan’s coat, even Björn came and sat by you to try and warm you up, with you sandwiched between them. Halfdan cupped your cheek, looking down at your paled face, his eyes twitched, full of worry.

You only got better after you sailed up the Normandy coast, having been forced to visit your uncle for medical help. Your brother lead the way as Halfdan carried you through the castle like men on a mission, accompanied by Rollo’s guards, before your uncle, and his wife were by your side, pressing the backs of their hands to your forehead and whispered nervously to each other.

Halfdan whispered to you, sat by your bed unmoving. Your aunt, you supposed, Gisla, tended to you, whether because Rollo asked or she felt pity, you didn’t know. She gave you your medicine, whispering to you in French, and sometimes waited with the servants while Halfdan helped you eat. Your cousins came to visit you, cute kids who gave you worried smiles and sometimes fruits or food. The oldest, William, you remembered, brought you a cup of wine he must have stolen from your uncle because you couldn’t fathom where he could have got it from. Halfdan propped you up so you could drink it, not wanting to make the kid cry.

Your uncle caught you with it, scolding you and William, before he picked up the kid, smiling at him despite the chastising glance he gave both you and Halfdan. In the end, it took another week before you were well enough to walk on your own, Halfdan hovering nearby. You’d grown closer to your cousins and rekindled somewhat of a friendship with your uncle. Gisla seemed to have warmed up to you, although from what you gathered from Rollo talking to Björn  she was still wary about all of you.

You’d gotten dressed, your weapons being carried by Halfdan after he fastened his cloak around you, it being much warmer than your own. Rollo personally escorted you out with your brother and Halfdan to the boats. You hugged your uncle, thanking him, and waved goodbye to your cousins as the Frankish boats rowed out to yours.

“Home?” Halfdan asked the both of you when you approached Kattegat.

“Honestly I don't know anymore.” Your brother replied. “What is home?”

“I'm a Viking. But there's something else. The mother of my children, Torvi, I don't love her anymore, she doesn't deserve it. I feel bad about it.

“What we deserve and what we get Björn Ironside, is never in balance.” Halfdan looked at you. “It appears the God's are not much interested in fairness.”

You and your brothers return to Kattegat came as a surprise to its people. They did not expect Björn or you to return for a long time.

Björn was greeted by Torvi and his children his face breaking out into an wild smile as you followed behind him, with Halfdan holding your hand as you walked through Kattagat. You followed them down to the Great Hall, stuck to Halfdan's side as people greeted you. You received a hug from your mother,keeping your hand behind you, in Halfdan’s before she turned to Björn, you listened in to the conversation between your mother and Björn.

“King Harald and your brother Ivar are planning to attack us.” You gave Halfdan a look, eyes slightly suspicious. He looked sheepish, and you knew the two of you were going to have a talk about this later.

“When?

“At the next full moon.

“It seems as I have returned just in time then.” Your brother gestured to you and Halfdan. “We will help.”

“We need even more help.” Lagertha said, eyeing Halfdan. “We can't underestimate the forces Harald and Ivar will come to bear. That is why I asked the Sami to join us.

You turned again from the conversation to see Ubbe approach you and Halfdan, he  gave you both hug, smiling at you.

At the feast you sat next to Halfdan, as he sat to Lagertha's right

“Tell me Halfdan, tell me what was the most exciting thing you saw on your travels?” She asked him.

“Nothing.” He answered easily.

Lagertha looked surprised by his answer, tilting her head curiously. “Nothing?”

“They call it the desert. It's just miles and miles of sand, sand as far as the eye can see. It's just nothing but sand.” Halfdan smiled.

“Horrible, gritty sand.” You added with a laugh, grinning at your mother. “It was harsher than our sand and it got everywhere.”

“And what was the second most amazing thing you saw?”

You smiled as Halfdan shot a glance at you before replying with a grin. “Everything.”

“What are you going to do Halfdan? Are you going to rejoin your brother?” Lagertha leaned in to ask him.

You swallowed the chunk of bread in your mouth and placed a hand on his thigh.

“No. Björn saved my life, and I have sworn allegiance to him, and nothing will make me change my mind. Besides I’m a married man and the love of my life is loyal to Björn. I would not betray them.” He grasped the armring above his sleeve.

“While you were away your brother came here. He swore to me that he no longer had always my designs for my kingdom but he was lying. How do I know, that you're not lying?”

“You don't. Even though I swore on my sacred ring, and my wedding ring.” Halfdan lifted his hand, showing off his ring to Lagertha, before he turned his head as Björn approached. “Do you think I'm lying, Björn? Bragi?”

“You and I crawled out from under the same rock, I believe you will fight against your brother.” You nodded with Björn. “Halfdan will not betray you mother.”

“An you Bragi? You won't side with Ivar? Or Hvitserk.”

“No, because I do not love them. Ubbe, I admit I care because he wasn't stupid. I despise Ivar for killing Sigurd. I swore I would kill him. Ivar and Hvitserk may still be our half-brothers, but I’m loyal to Björn, I always have been.” Your conversation ended there with nothing else to contribute.

You and Halfdan retired from the Great Hall, tired of the celebrations. You didn't care for the food or drink, only Halfdan's words from inside the hall.

“You told Lagertha that you were married and the love of your life was loyal to Björn. I’m the love of your life Halfdan?” You held his hand as you walked in the dark together. You felt him squeeze your hand. “What will you tell your brother? If you face him.”

“Of course you’re the love of my life, we’ve been together for this long Bragi. You’re everything in my life.” He cupped your cheek. “And I'll tell him the truth.”

“My mother said that Harald came back to Kattegat. Did you know?” You met his eyes.

“He said he wanted to see if your mother would marry him.” That sheepish look he had before was back on his face. “She must have turned him down.” You ran your fingers over the shaved side of his head.

“I don’t think I’d ever let that happen.” It would technically make your brother-in-law your step father and you shuddered at that. “Technically that would make you my uncle.” Halfdan shuddered at that.

“Let’s not think about that idea please.” He shook his head.

He laughed as you made your way up to the steps of your home, tugging you along with him, keeping an eye out for any curious heads before leading him inside. He closed the door behind him, before diving into your bed and stretching his arms over his head.

You spent the night together, curled in an embrace in your bed, facing each other. You spent the night touching each other's faces, memorizing scars and tattoos, marks and every wrinkle and smile line on each other's faces. You spent the night holding each others hands and repeating your vows to one another.

 

* * *

 

Your mother approached you as you sat on the beach in the middle of the night. You didn’t know why she was awake in the middle of the night or wandering about Kattegat, maybe it was her motherly instincts that knew that you were restless or she herself was feeling restless and came out for some fresh air.

“So my youngest son is married, and I still haven’t met his wife.” Your mother said when she sat next to you, eyes trained over the water. “Björn told me. You didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend.”

You twisted the ring on your finger, thinking about Halfdan asleep in your bed, wrapped in your blankets, your pillow tucked into his side. “I don’t think you can necessarily meet her. And I didn’t tell anyone, Björn only found out in the Mediterranean.” You said after a moment.

“Why not?” Your mother turned to you. “Is she one of King Harald’s shield-maidens?” You chuckled at that, dropping your head slightly.

“Well, for one.” You met her eyes, a slight smile tugging at the corner of your lips. “She is, not a she. And you have already met him.”

“Bragi?” Your mother sounded like she had it figured out. You turned your body to face her, taking in her expression. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“If you’re trying to say that you’ve figured out I’m married to Halfdan. You’d be right.” You turned your head away, before you felt her place a hand on your shoulder.

“You are my son, and you are a man. I can’t keep you from being with someone.” She sighed, turning back to look over the water. “How long have you been together?”

“I’ve liked him since he brought Harald’s men for Ragnar’s second raid to Paris.” You admitted. “We got together in Paris.”

“I may not approve entirely of him, but I’m glad, you found someone who makes you happy, someone that you trust.” You wrapped an arm around your mother, pulling her to your side.

“I love him. Neither of us, will betray you.” You stood, giving your mother a soft smile. “Good night.”

The next morning, you met with your mother, Ubbe and Björn, Halfdan by your side as you helped with the preparations. You did not lie to yourself, about how nervous you were.

“Are you ready my friend?” Björn asked Halfdan as the three of you walked.

“Of course.”

“You may have to fight against your brother.”

“It is the same for you.” He glanced at you. “The both of you. Some trees have to fall in the forest.”

You mounted your horses, marching out of Kattegat’s gates at Björn’s order.

Your armies stood opposite from one another, you glanced at Halfdan, chest tight.

“This is not right. It is not right that the sons of Ragnar should try and slaughter each other.” Lagertha turned to you. “We will send emissaries.”

“I agree.”

Björn, and Halfdan approached Harald's army, stopping midway. Hvitserk and Harald rode out to meet them. You huffed as you watched Halfdan trot over to the other side with Harald, and Hvitserk returned with Björn. You listened to Ubbe and Hvitserk talk but you only thought of Halfdan and the choice he was now faced with. You ached to have him next to you, to hold him close, to soothe the horrible feeling in your chest. Morning couldn't come any sooner.

* * *

Halfdan was in his own situation of worry, scanning his brothers face. “This is madness.”

“Is it?” Harald leaned over the table. “You are here where you belong, don't deny it. Why would you fight for Lagertha, or Björn, or Bragi, they are not your folk?”

“Björn saved my life, and I got married to the love of my life, they are still loyal to Björn. Isn't that reason enough?” He asked, pressing his hand to his armring, gesturing with it.

“Not really, we all choose to live all dangerous life, it is part of our way. So I think you give what happened between you and Björn too much importance.” Ivar said.

“Family has a greater claim. I don't want to fight against you. I don't want to have to kill you. The world will make no sense. What is Björn or your princess compared to blood?”

“I supposed none of this makes sense to him anyway.” He nodded at the Christian. “But I won't betray my heart, I swore I wouldn’t, I know what I want Harald.”

“He's a great warrior he doesn't need anything to make sense.”

“By the gods, Ivar, you are just so cynical.  You just don't care, do you?”

“I care, about winning this war. Halfdan you have to choose between your friends or a brother. To me, the answer is obvious.” Ivar crawled away without looking at him.

“You are a part of my fate as I am am part of yours. Stay.”

“And my heart is a part of mine. I will not lose them.” Halfdan shook his head. “You don't understand brother. Your princess didn't love you.” He dropped his voice to a whisper and he met his brothers eyes. “Bragi loves me.”

  
  


* * *

The next morning you sat in your chair, Halfdan was standing behind you, his hands on your shoulders. You were well aware of Harald's eyes on Halfdan's hands, and the matching armrings you had.  _ Was it worth it?  _ His eyes seemed to ask, before he turned his head to sneer at Lagertha.

“Brother, let's not fight.” Halfdan said above you. “What can we gain? Nothing.”

“On the contrary. We will gain the world. Join us and I will share it with you.”

Halfdan shook his head and you leaned forward. “I've already chosen to follow my heart brother. I will not change my mind.”

“Yes I see that.” His eyes on the both of you.  “Was it worth it?” You lifted your hand to grasp Halfdan's forearm.

“Always.” Halfdan looked down at you. “It will always be worth it.”

“And you Bragi, we fought in Paris, and in Rogaland, you were pretty much a part of us. Does our friendship mean absolutely nothing to you? Did our kindness mean nothing?” You shook your head.

“I told you Harald, back in Paris and I will tell you again now. I love Björn and I love my family. I love my father.” You leaned forward in your chair. “I will not choose you just so you can let Ivar tear his legacy and my family apart. It’s not Kattegat but the people in it I care about. I didn’t care about your ambitions to be King of all Norway.” You stood, Halfdan’s hands still on you. “I didn’t care when you conspired behind my back because you were still a good man, a kind man to your people, it’s a pity that you’re siding with Ivar, he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. We could’ve been allies, I was willing to fight for that, I vouched for you with my life.”

You were entirely suspicious when Ivar renounced his promise to kill Lagertha, expressing regret for killing Sigurd, and lamenting about the possibility of killing you and the rest of your brothers.

Harald eyed the both of you but you couldn’t read his expression, you shook your head at him. He knew just as well as you why you didn’t join him before, and he knew that first and foremost you were loyal to your father, and then to Björn. You seethed when Harald tipped his mead onto the ground, and growled when Ivar then splashed his into Ubbe’s face.

You let out a deep breath and narrowed your eyes at Ivar. “Why waste the mead.” You drank your cup before dropping it and drawing your axe, ready to fling it and tp advance and shatter Ivar’s skull, only to be stopped by Halfdan's hand on your chest, pulling you behind him.  

“You know who would win in a fight Ivar between the two of us, you can't have bodyguards forever. King Harald won't be there to protect you.” You sneered from behind Halfdan, glaring at him, teeth bared.

“You know, I finally realized something.” Ivar said as he hobbled closer, standing behind Harald, looking you in the eyes. “You really were a bitch to his brother.” Ivar sneered at you. “You’re less of a man than all of us."

“You don’t know anything about being a man Ivar.” You snapped at him. “You’ve always been the least of a man out of all of us. At least I know loyalty, and as a married man, I know that people love me for me and not out of pity.”

“You're sure? Are you going to deny your brother?” Harald approached Halfdan.

“Björn saved my life, I'm indebted. And I won’t leave Bragi.” He said looking at you. “Not even for you, brother.”

“You're not his blood, neither of them.”

“Maybe we care too much for that.

“Maybe, maybe.”

“I’m sorry brother. Truly. But I love him.” He said against his brothers forehead.

“Don't be sorry. No.”

You were ready to tackle Harald, but Lagertha stopped you, a hand on your shoulder, firm.

“You know I'll kill you, you understand that? I will kill you.” Halfdan stood quietly, not saying a word, you placed your hands on his shoulders and steered him away, his face blank. The rest of you had begun to turn away from them, Ubbe, Björn and the warriors carrying your banners began to back away. You grabbed Halfdan’s hand, sliding your fingers between his, leading him away.

You regathered on the battlefield the next morning, your head filled with worries about what would happen if Halfdan was to face his brother.

“In the name of Odin. In the name of my father. Attack!” You ran forward with Halfdan and Ubbe in the first wave, clashing your shield against the first man you ran into. Your group was already pushing back the first wave of Harald's men, you roared as you hacked at them, blood splattering across your face.

Harald sent the second wave of men soon after, disadvantaged by Ivar pulling away a third of their army to head towards the boats. You stuck by Halfdan’s side, keeping an eye and shield on him, and your brothers as you fought. Harald charged with the last wave of his remaining warriors, you could see him among the crowded chaos as you fought.

“Still no regrets brother!” Harald yelled as he spotted Halfdan.

“What is there to regret! You haven't won yet!” Halfdan shouted back at him as you shoulder checked a man running his way, slamming your axe into his skull. You laughed when Lagertha emerged from the forest and over the chaos you heard Björn yell. You pulled Halfdan away from his brother, engaging into the rest of the fight, watching his back.

“Bragi!” Halfdan yelled pulling you out of the way of a sword towards your throat. You grasped the back of his neck, pulling him close and quickly pressing your forehead tor his before turning your attention to Harald's forces beginning to retreat. You wrapped you arm and round Halfdan's waist, pulling him close to you without a care of anyone else around you as the others chased Harald's forces halfway.

You cradled his face in your hands as he stood still, staring at the chaos surrounding him. “Halfdan? Halfdan?” You searched his face for a sign. You returned back to camp, leaving your dead behind you, hand clutching tightly onto Halfdan as you guided him to your tent. You knew that this wasn't over. As long as Ivar was still alive he would return.

You didn't leave Halfdan's side in your camp, stroking your fingers through his hair as you sat in his lap. You didn't care who saw, when Björn walked past and gave you a smile. Or when Ubbe looked at you with utter confusion as you pressed your forehead to his. It was obvious now to most the warriors where Halfdan's loyalties actually lay.

You didn't like that Lagertha spared Bishop Heahmund, and his judging eyes at how close you were to Halfdan. You did notice that it lessened after he spoke to Lagertha while he was healing. Ubbe came up to you at one point, looking at you and Halfdan curiously.

“Is he why you always tried to keep an alliance between them and us?” He asked softy. You nodded, stroking Halfdan’s hair. He had offered to go on a hunting party earlier and now he was tired, dozing, laying against your side as you both sat outside your tent enjoying the breeze.

“We’ve been together for a long time Ubbe.” You sighed softly looking down at Halfdan. “Since Paris, it’s been a decade of hiding. None of you would’ve understood.”

“You were young, when father went to Paris. We all were.” Ubbe sat on a stool next to you. “You met him then, how old were you? Ninteen?”

You met your brothers eyes. “I was twenty-two. When I saw him arrive in Kattegat, there wasn’t any other man who I could have been attracted to after that. And I felt guilty for it. You know I never put any effort into anyone here in Kattegat.” You tried to read his expression as he spoke. “But he cared for me, when father was busy with Yidu, when Björn was taking command of the men we took to Paris, when you and Hvitserk didn’t want to hang around me, thinking you knew everything about the world at that age, gods you were nine, why would I have told you I was sleeping with him.” Ubbe chuckled at that. “He and his brother let me raid with their men, they were my friends, Ubbe, and Halfdan, we became more than that.” You held up the hand with your ring on it. “We hid our relationship for a long time.”

“I’m sorry, that you couldn’t trust us.” He clasped his hands together. “I’m sorry we weren’t a family to you. You’re our brother too we should havde done more for you.” He dropped his eyes to the floor. “But I’m glad you’re happy. I’m glad you’re married to someone you love.”


	15. Chapter 15

When the scouts came informing you of the Frankish soldiers arriving on King Harald's shores, your heart was in your throat. You had lost your advantage, and you were afraid of the outcome.

That night you held Halfdan, as he stared at the ceiling, silent in thought. You ran your hand through his hair, your chest rising and falling in an unsteady rhythm, biting back tears.

“I don't want you to die to your brother.” You said wetly, your fingers tracing his tattoos. “I don't want you to die.” You sniffed. “Please don't face your brother, we can run away, we don’t have to do this. We can run away, Björn would understand.”

“We can’t run from our fates Bragi. You know I don't have a choice on the battlefield. The gods have already decided the outcome of this battle.” He hugged your other arm to his chest, tracing his fingers upon the three armrings that you wore. “If I am to die tomorrow. Know that I will die loving you to the greatest intensity.”

You shook your head as a tear tracked down your face, followed by a second, and a third. “I will do anything in my power to keep you, you cannot leave me in this world without you.” For a son of Ragnar, you always thought you cried too easily, felt things too intensely, especially when you were with your own thoughts. “There would be nothing left for me.” You admitted, your tears now freely falling down your face.

Haldan’s fingers paused, he turned to look at your face, expression softening as he caught sight of your tears. “No, no Bragi don’t cry.” He pressed his forehead against yours, sighing. “Please don't cry. You have made me the happiest man on Midgard.”

“I don't want you to to be ready to die.” You squeezed your eyes shut. “I want you to live. I want you to want to live, with me.”

“Oh Bragi, my sweet prince, my heart.” He sighed. “You have enough hope for the both of us.”

“I won't let you die. You're my heart. I am a part of our soul, you said so long ago.”

 

* * *

 

 

“They won't make a deal.” Your heart was stuck in your throat, listening to Björn speaking to all of you.

“If Uncle Rollo has helped Ivar, surely he'd attack by land, no need to risk an attack by sea when he could just overwhelm us.” You frowned, resting your chin on your clasped hands,

“The gods have already decided the outcome of this battle.” Halfdan spoke nonchalantly. “It is up to us whether we follow our fate or deny it.”

You were tasked to keeping your shield at Halfdan’s back. Björn took one look at you before deciding it, with a hand of your shoulder. “If anyone can keep him alive it will be you.” He said plainly.  

Your heart ached as Halfdan began singing, his voice rasping as it echoed over the misted battlefield. You held him close, listening to him, you heard Harald voice echo back through the field, Halfdan could only sigh, continuing the song.

“I heard you singing with your brother.” Björn approached you and Halfdan.  “It must be hard for you.

“Let me tell you something I owe my brother so much but I owe you both far more. You took me on a great adventure Björn, and Bragi, you showed me that life has more to offer than fighting for land, or for worthless glory against your own Viking brothers…” He paused. “And if I have to die today, then so be it. I'm ready for Valhalla.

You wrapped your fingers around his forearm, pressing your head against his shoulder.

“At least I know life has taught me something. You both have taught me something.”

“Thank you.”

“I love you.” You said to him firmly.

You marched down towards the battlefield from your camp, hand intertwined with Halfdans. You looked out over the field, spotting Ivars army, your hand still clutching Halfdan’s tight, his fingers squeezed yours for comfort.

You could hear the sounds of ravens as they cawed, the smell of the forest invaded your senses, eyes unfocused on the battle in front of you. You could see bright blue skies and could feel the ocean waves beneath you, you could barely steady yourself as you stumbled behind Halfdan who seemed to be in a similar state as you, staring into the chaos. You could hear Halfdan singing to you, even though you knew he was in front of you, the only thing escaping his mouth was roars and screams, hacking away at people with his axe. You shoved people out of his way with your shield. You thought maybe the gods were trying to speak to you as the ravens circled over you.

Your state of mind seemed to clear when you saw Halfdan freeze in front of his brother, his eyes wide and manic. Harald, with much shorter hair than you remembered, had his sword over his shoulder blood dripping off it and onto him, onto the ground. “I didn’t want to kill you brother!”

You sprinted towards and tackled Harald before he could slash his brothers throat, knocking him to the ground with a roar. You rolled, dodging as he swung his sword haphazardly towards you. You stumbled to your feet, glaring daggers at Harald. “I won’t let you kill him.” You spat some grass out of your mouth, gripping your axe.

“You have no right to stand between me and my brother.” He retorted as he got to his feet.

“I have every right. I’m his husband!” You caught the look that Harald gave you as you grabbed Halfdan’s hand and pulled him away, hearing Björns calls for a retreat, as the Frankish soldiers marched forward, commanded by Ivar. You gripped his hand tight, pulling him along as you ran, watching your folk get slaughtered around you.

You retreated to Kattegat, steering Halfdan, through the forest towards the town.  It wouldn’t be long before Ivar made his way to take the town. You rushed to your house, gathering what you could as quickly as you could with one hand while the other gripped Halfdan, still in his dazed state. You stood still for a moment, looking at what you would have to leave behind, and what you could bring with you. You placed the single bag you were carrying to your bed, turning to Halfdan with the few precious moments of quiet that you had. “Halfdan. Halfdan.” You said softly, cradling his face in your hands. “Please Halfdan talk to me. What's wrong?” He murmured something you couldn't understand. “Halfdan?” You sighed to yourself. “We have to go Halfdan. What do you want me to pack?”  

You left Halfdan safely at your home before you carried yours and Halfdans things towards Björn and your mother, as many things as you could reasonable take. You didn’t know if all of you would be able to escape. You let Björn control the crowd of people demanding their right to safety against Ivar. You couldn’t save all of Kattegat’s people, you knew that it was clear as day, Torvi redirected you to a horse, helping you strap your things to one, and Halfdan’s to another. You thanked her and ran back for Halfdan, steering him towards the horses, helping him onto his. You weren't sure what he was seeing, but it left him confused and slow. He needed rest.

You returned to Björns side when most infighting ceased, a hand on his shoulder. “Where's our mother? Björn, where's Lagertha?” Your brother turned his head to one of the horses, nodding to your mother being tended to by Torvi, wrapped in a blanket her hair as white as Kattegat's landscape in winter.

“We need to get moving Björn. Ivar won't hesitate to push his advantage.” You turned toward the port, searching the horizon for any sign of Ivars ships approaching by sea. “Where would we go?”

“Get Halfdan on a horse, we leave by foot.” You almost didn't hear him. When you didn't move he said it again. “Bragi go get to the horses."

“Björn.”

“Go!” He shouted at you, before lowering his tone when he noticed you flinch. “Please Bragi. I need to keep you safe, my family safe. Now get on the damn horses.

You nodded, returning back to Halfdan's side. He seemed more aware now, lifting his eyes to meet yours. “You attacked Harald to save me.” He murmured as you stood next to him. You stood on your tiptoes as he leaned down to kiss you. Before you climbed onto your own horse

“We’ve got to get moving Halfdan. And, I told you,” You said softly, interrupted by Björns order to ride. “I did not want you to die, not when we finally have a chance to do more than just hide.”

“I do not want to hide. Not anymore. I am truly happy with you.”

“We won't anymore. I promise.”

 

* * *

 

“We could go to England,” Bishop Heahmund suggested. You’d ridden your horses directed by your mother, and were now hunkering down somewhere not far from Hedeby with the few people you took. It had broken your heart to leave the people of Kattegat behind.

“They would kill us Heahmund. We are Vikings, we’re not like you.”

“Possibly, not necessarily, I can speak for you. I can speak to king Aethelwulf but he will ask us to fight for him.” You stood with Halfdan, sighing about even thinking.

“I do not want to leave my country.” You heard Lagertha murmur. “But yet I’m tired of fighting, lets go to England.”

You didn’t have a choice, but you looked at Halfdan. “But if we have a chance, let’s do that.” He smiled at you and pulled you close. “Anything for you, I will fight for you, I always will.”

You did not know why they brought Margrethe with you. Ubbe and Torvi were both kind people but she did not deserve to live. She claimed Torvi was a demon, threatening to kill her. You and Halfdan had already approached Björn about possibly killing her, since she threatened your group and would put all of you at risk if she didn't shut her mouth.

Later that night you stood at arms as you spotted riders. It was your uncle Rollo as he rode into your camp. You ignored your uncle as he tried to speak to you. You did not trust him after his troops helped Ivar. You sat with Halfdan in the cold, watching as Lagertha spoke with Rollo, your breath leaving puffs of clouds in the air. Björn approached them soon after. You shook your head and laid it against Halfdan’s shoulder.

Björn asked you to join him inside. “Can we believe his offer?”

“I’m going to kill him.” Björn declared.

“Once a betrayer. Always a betrayer.” You commented, as Björn pointed out all his mistakes.

“Are you afraid to die?” Your brother looked at you, and at everyone else. “Not me!”

“Björn don’t do it!” You followed your brother outside. “He’s not worth it Björn.” You watched as Ubbe tried to hold him back and fail, as he flipped his axe, once, twice in his hands before holding it to Rollo’s neck.

“We refuse your offer.”

“I am sorry.” Your uncle lamented on his knees.

Björn spat at his knees. “No need traitor.” You took one last glance at your uncle before turning away to Halfdan’s outstretched arms, pulling you close

You travelled to Vestfold first by horse, under Halfdan’s guidance. Stealing a boat from there in the quiet of the night, you and Halfdan stole some food from their stores, and waterskins to last the journey.

You arrived in England soon enough, only to see Saxons on the shores as you sailed downriver. Bishop Heahmund spoke to them from your boat, and soon enough you were put in a cage, transported by cart towards a city. The Saxons jeered at you, calling you murderers and heathens. They spat in your direction and glared at you, but still with fear in their eyes.

You were put in cells listening to your brothers argue. “Why are we still fighting?” You asked, knocking your head back against the cell wall. “We are the last, sane sons of Ragnar, why do we fight among ourselves. Why do we spit venom at each other when we none of us at all are to blame for losing a battle. When it is Rollo to blame for being a traitor once more?”

Guards came for you, your brothers, Torvi and your mother to discuss with King Alfred, from what you recognized. He offered you a solution, an offer, which Lagertha accepted.

“You look familiar.” You said to him before you left the room. “You remind me of Athelstan.” You tilted your head at him, before leaving.

You finally were allowed to wander around the villa that you were granted use to, as finally the others, your nephew and niece, Halfdan were released and able to walk around. You took him into your arms, pressing your lips to his. England wasn’t something you had ever considered after your father turned his sights from it, and after you thought of avenging him, but still you were here, and you found yourself in the walls of it’s kings villa, as King Alfred called it.

The next morning you accompanied your brothers to meet with King Alfred. You shook your head as your brothers raised their voices and acted rashly. You left the room soon, following King Alfred, politely nodding at the Saxon lords that stood watching him meet his future wife. Haldan was there, as were Torvi and Bjorn.

You watched your Ubbe and Torvi and spar in the courts, when you heard a man talk about putting you and your brothers to death. You raised an eyebrow at him, glancing over to him.

“Would you like to say that to my face my lord?” You asked loudly as Haldan stood straighter behind you. Alfred’s future wife and the man turned to look at you. “I am a son of Ragnar,” You looked at him with a smile on your face. “Would you like to put me to death sir?”

The man looked flustered, concerned at your sudden interest in him. “Do you know why we allow our women to fight?” You turned your attention to the girl. “Because in our eyes, our women are as equal as our men. Everyone is equal is in eyes of our gods, because as long as they live, our gods live with them.”

The Saxons in the street murmured to themselves as you sat on the table and looked at you. “Women are as important as men, some even smarter, than men. Men should do best to remember that, and you should too lady, don’t let a court of men rule your every decision.”

Later that day you and Ubbe were called to meet King Alfred. He asked you both to be baptized, to renounce the gods. Ubbe said he needed time to think, and left the room without a second glance but you stood still.

“I can’t.” You said firmly. “Worship your god. I will never, I can never.”

“And why not?” He looked at you, curious at your conviction, you realized he was barely a man.

“Your god, he would take away the man I love.” You told him. “If I gave up my gods, if I worshiped yours. I would not be allowed to love him. I would lose all that I ever fought for. I cannot do that. I won’t lose my husband.” You shrugged and looked him in the eyes. “If Ubbe did that, I don’t care he’s a man. He can make his own decisions. But I fought for my love I will not lose him.”

You joined Halfdan and your brothers in the court moments before Alfred’s soon to be wife approached Björn. You eyed the girl, distrusting her instantly. She had eyes for your brother, as many women did.

“Women seem to love my brother.” You commented to Halfdan as your brother disappeared.

“Men too.” Halfdan said softly.

You looked at him wide eyed but with a smile on your face. “No? You found him attractive when you met didn’t you?”

“He was a presence.” Halfdan admitted, meeting your eyes, but he had a smile on his face. “But I’m with the better looking brother.” He placed a hand on yours.

You rolled your eyes at him and lifted his hand and pressed a kiss to it. “I will admit, I didn’t know whether it was you or Harald I liked more. But Harald felt more like a wise older brother, than anything else, and you, you seemed to flirt with me for the moment we sat together in the great hall.

“I was, flirting with you when we met.” He smiled. “When you were staring at us, I wanted to tease you for it. I wanted to do so many things to you that night. But I didn’t know if you were for it when I carried you home drunk.”  

Later you all sat together, talking about options. Ubbe and Björn kept fighting, and you hated that.

“Here we are in a foreign land and you still want to keep fighting each other.” You snapped at them. “We don’t have that many options here Björn, so unless we want to leave here and go die at Ivar’s hand we need to look at everything that we can do to get our revenge.”

“And you? Bragi? You’d renounce our gods?”

You sighed at your brother shaking your head. “No. Renouncing them would mean losing Halfdan forever, taking a wife. I will not lose him.” You met Halfdan’s eyes. “He means too much to me you know that Björn.”

As much as it pained you, you and Halfdan were present for Torvi and Ubbe’s baptism and marriage. It hurt you to hear your brother renounced the gods, and Toriv, a powerful warrior who’d been loyal to your family for years. You frowned when Björn left, but kept your eyes on your little brother. You hugged your little brother, smiling at him.

“I’m glad you’ve found happiness brother.”

 

* * *

“I don’t want to suggest this.” You said in your bed that night with Halfdan. “But could we approach your brother, get him to turn against Ivar?”

“Bragi what?” You bit your lip, eyes searching Halfdan’s face.

“He can’t stay a pawn to Ivar forever Halfdan.” You held his hand, pulling him close to you. “He’s smarter than Ivar, he still has his ambitions, and he’s stronger than Ivar. It was your brother’s men that supported Ivar, gave him the means to fight us. If we convinced Harald to fight with us we could change the tides.”

“He might kill us. He might be set with Ivar, he’d…” He trailed off.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have suggested.”

“It’s okay Bragi. I know you want to help Björn and retake Kattegat.” He leaned in until his eyelashes fluttered against your cheek, kissing your jaw. “I just don’t want you to die.”

 

* * *

 

 

When Alfred had told you that Harald had come to Wessex. You stood there, with your hands clasped behind your back, eyes flitting to Halfdan, your heart beating. Alfred locked eyes with you, and it sounded like he was implying that Harald was there for you, as well as with the intent to raid Wessex. You stared back at him, unblinking, firmly planted until Alfred dismissed all of you.

You approached Björn after that meeting with King Alfred. ”Björn I need to talk to you.” You grabbed his shoulder. “Halfdan and I, we’re going to try and convince Harald to betray Ivar. You know he will be too ambitious to be Ivar’s pawn forever.”

”Bragi, he could hurt you.” Björn  looked at you. “He could kill the both of you.”

“We need to try Björn, Ivar is a plague, he will not stop.” You gripped his shoulder. “If we could, if we could convince him, we could do something about it.” You let out a deep breath. “I need… I need you to not tell anyone Björn.” You looked him in the eyes. “We might be asked to fight with him. I will probably have to swear my life to him, if he agrees, and to save Halfdan if Harald tries anything.”

“Please?” You asked when he was silent.

“I won’t tell Bragi. I won’t. But do not die.” He pulled you close, whispering in your ear. “I do not want the next time I see you again to be in Valhalla.”


	16. Chapter 16

You asked permission from King Alfred for you and Halfdan and to scout ahead, to judge the size of Harald’s army. To report back their camp and the number of men that had come with him. To your surprise, he agreed to it, agreeing to send you and Halfdan with a few soldiers, on horseback to scout the army. It was a hard decision when you arrived just a ways away from the river and you left your horses behind, creeping forward through the bushes to peer over Harald’s camp. Your heart, beat in your chest as you glanced around at the Saxon soldiers around you, brain running on overdrive. You looked to Halfdan and nodded, before turning around and slaughtering them together, taking them out before they could make a noise or get away to alert Alfred.

You and Halfdan approached the river’s edge, calling for attention from Haralds men. It seemed to surprise them, that you were approaching them so willingly.

“We want to speak to King Harald.” You asked as you came closer, Halfdan standing next to you.

“And who are you?” They stepped forward, raising a torch in your direction.

“I’m Bragi, son of Ragnar.” You began.

“It’s me, Halfdan.” He said from beside you, eyes trained on the warriors ahead of you. “Torhall, Siegfried, let us speak to my brother.”

You heard them mutter between themselves before coming closer, weapons drawn. “We will take you to King Harald.” They grabbed your arms, the both of you, shoving you forward, taking you through the camp.

They brought you to Haralds tent, pushing you and Halfdan onto your knees in front of him. You tried to force a smile, as you met his eyes. “Harald. It’s good to see you again.” You tried to stand, only to be shoved down again onto your knees.

“Why are you here?” You sighed.

“We wanted to talk to you. We needed to talk to you.” Halfdan tilted his head.

“And why would you want to talk to me?” He stood from his chair, walking towards you both. “My brother the traitor, and one of the men he betrayed me for?”

“Harald you know why he did it.” You raised your head, staring at him. “Don’t all men do things for love.” You said to him, eyes firm. “You did it.”

“And what a fool I was.” He murmured. “To trust my princess.”

“You knew my loyalty was to Björn, Harald you knew that plain as day, that after my father was confirmed to be dead. I swore my life to him, you told me it was the right thing to do when we got back to Kattegat.” You pleaded.

“That was before I knew that you would take Halfdan with you!” He snapped. “But I don’t blame him, your loyalty to us despite your brothers was astounding.” He turned to Halfdan. “How long were you two together?”

“Since Paris.” He admitted, eyes on his brother. “After we killed those villagers, took their food and livestock, and came back to camp.” He glanced at you. “We kissed, in his tent when I went to check on him.”

“I was enamoured with your brother from the day he landed in Kattegat and brought all your men, but I knew by then in Paris I had already loved him.” You looked at Harald, pleading. “You knew better than anyone else, the both of you, that if Björn Ironside wasn’t my brother I would have sworn to serve you and Halfdan.”

“You hid this from me? From your family?” He looked at you. “From everyone? You were together since Paris? That was ten, almost eleven years ago.”

“Floki knew, he warned us that no one would be happy.” Harald frowned. “King Arnarson’s son caught us when we were in Rogaland, we killed him so he wouldn’t tell you, and Björn caught us when we were in the Mediterranean, after killing King Ecbert.”

“How could you think that I would be anything but happy for you brother?” Harald asked softly. “You are my baby brother.”

“You wanted to overthrow Lagertha, and to do that you would have had to kill Björn, you knew you couldn’t be King in Kattegat if either one of them were alive.” Halfdan looked at you. “Bragi would have been devastated by Björn’s death. He would have never had followed either of us if I had a h and in it. He would’ve never be here with me now. I would follow him to the ends of Midgard.”

“Oh stand up the two of you.” Harald shooed his warriors away, pulling you both up by the arms. “I have spent, every day, thinking about the two of you since we took Kattegat. I have been hollow without you my brother, and without you Bragi, and with the loss of Astrid and her child.” He hugged the both of you close, pressing his forehead against yours. “It hurt me to have to fight against you both, and it hurt to realize that you two got married and I wasn’t there because you couldn’t trust me.”

“Believe me brother, we didn’t want to either.” Halfdan murmured, one hand cupping the side of his brother’s head.

“You know better Harald, you both became my family when I felt myself drifting from mine.” You held them both tight. You three stood there, embraced, breathing in deeply and slowly together, as tears ran down your faces.

“So why did you decide to come to me.” He asked when he finally pulled away from the both of you.

You glanced at Halfdan nervously. “We want your help in overthrowing Ivar.” You watched as Harald began to smile.

“But that would make you in line for the throne in Kattegat. Why would I help?”

“I don’t care about Kattegat. Harald you know that. I want to live, with Halfdan. We want to fight for something that isn’t worthless glory against our own brothers.” You grasped Halfdan’s hand. ”If we overthrow Ivar and Hvitserk, I will give you Kattegat’s throne and my support as it’s King. You know I don’t want it. I just want a happy life with your brother.”

“I will help you.” Harald smiled, both you and Halfdan sighing in relief. “But only if you fight with us tomorrow. To prove your loy uldalty to me.” He focused his eyes on you. “And you must swear to me, Bragi, but also to my brother. That you are a part of this family now. You will be a son of Ragnar Lothbrok in name only, but that you are one of us now.”

You nodded, Halfdan pulling you close to him. “I intended to the night your brother asked me to marry him. I won’t betray you Harald, and I would never betray Halfdan.”

He nodded, patting you both on the shoulder, before leaning out his tent to call a man in. “Prepare a tent for them. They will be staying with us.”

The man that Halfdan called Siegfried led you to your tent. He clasped Halfdan’s shoulder before you both went inside.

“It’s good to have you back.” He said to him. “I’m happy you aren’t dead.” He left.

You and Halfdan entered the tent, smiling at each other. “The bed of that villa seems a lifetime away doesn’t it.” You sighed. “Did we make the right choice Halfdan?”

“I’m worried what will Björn think.” He murmured to you. “I swore him my sword, but he knew I wasn’t happy to fight for the Saxons.”

“Halfdan I told Björn we were going to do this.” Halfdan’s head whipped around from where he was placing his armour.

“He knew?” You nodded, sitting yourself down on the bed that was set up for the two of you.

“He gave me my blessing to do so. And told us not to die.”

 

* * *

 

Harald greeted Ubbe the next morning, you and Halfdan were behind him alongside Olaf and Gunnhilde. He led your brother to a table, where they sat and talked, where Ubbe revealed himself to be a Christian much to Harald’s disgust. You and Halfdan didn’t sit, your eyes trained on Harald as he spoke.

“You and Björn and Lagertha you can join with us. We can fight them. Like your brother, and Halfdan have rejoined me.”

Ubbe’s eyes turned to you and Halfdan, narrowed and questioning. You shook your head, unable to meet his eyes. “We had no choice Ubbe. We’re Viking. It’s where we belong. It’s in our blood.” You felt Halfdan press a hand to your back. Ubbe left, only with a shake of his head to you and Halfdan. A promise to return the next day. There was no doubt in your mind that Ubbe told your brother, Torvi and Lagertha, and Kind Alfred that you were with them, even though Björn would have already known.

You followed them into battle the next morning, axe and shield in hand, next to Harald, and next to Halfdan. As the flames surrounded you and the others. Your brothers were already there, standing with Alfred and his army. You fought with Halfdan and Harald, blood splattering across your faces as you stood by their side, cutting down the Saxon soldiers around you. Their number was more than you expected, and it was clear with your brothers, and mother to help them. That they had a greater advantage to battle. You met Björn on the field, your eyes wide, with regret and hurt, with fear, as the flames singed your skin and your clothes.

“Björn! I don’t want to fight you!” You yelled over the chaos, eyes wide.

“Move Bragi!” He yelled at you, turning away, distracted by another warrior. You were pulled away by Halfdan, yanking you aside and away from Björn . Your eyes wide as most of the warriors you were with scattered. You did your best to avoid fighting with Lagertha, or Torvi or gods forbid that you came face to face with Ubbe, you wouldn’t have been able to kill him. You stayed by Halfdan’s side, slamming your shield into the faces and bodies of Saxons. You kept an eye for him, as your numbers slowly dwindled in battle.

Harald and Halfdan had to pull you away from the field, as you were forced to retreat, Harald calling out for retreat and to run, to save yourselves, your eyes trained on your brothers as you were being dragged away. You felt your heart break to be torn away from Björn and from Ubbe, but you had no choice. You let Halfdan grip your hand and Harald grip your arm as they pulled you away.

 

* * *

 

“So Bragi betrayed us, and Halfdan?” Torvi asked, as they stood over Bishop Haehmund’s body.

“Bragi told me that he had no choice. That he, that we, were vikings. That it was in our blood.” Ubbe said softly. “I think he might have been right.”

“You know he was right.” Björn said. “Of course he was right. We are Viking. We should have been fighting with Harald, not with Alfred. Besides they went to turn Harald against Ivar. If Bragi and Halfdan were fighting with them it means Harald agreed and we have a chance.”

 

* * *

 

“Who was that man your brother seemed so close with?” Alfred asked Ubbe and Björn, holding a council after Bishop Haehmund was buried.

“That was Halfdan the Black. He’s King Harald Finehair’s brother. My brother’s husband.” Björn admitted. “But he has always loved my brother and has been loyal to him.”

“And your brother truly won’t be torn from him?” The boy asked curiously, eyeing Björn and Ubbe.

“Yes. Bragi would rather die than lose him.” Björn straightened his back. “If you’re going to imply that Bragi was a traitor for the wrong reasons-”

“I’m not! Going to talk ill of your brother.” He shook his head. “When I met your father and Ivar, Ivar would talk about how Bragi was in charge of keeping an alliance with you and King Finehair, how he had an eye for those things.” Alfred stood at his desk, eyeing the map in front of you. “You know why he left Björn, don’t you?”

“He and Halfdan went to convince King Harald to turn against our brother Ivar, so we can overthrow him.” Björn explained. “Bragi doesn’t want to fight for you, he wants to fight for himself. He’s Viking.”

“And did he succeed?”

“Was my baby brother fighting with us or against us?” Björn snapped.

“Against us.”

“Then there’s your answer. He wouldn’t have sworn to fight with King Harald if he wasn’t going to overthrow Ivar.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Harald have a much needed chat, Magnus continues to claim he's your brother, and Halfdan is bolder with his affections.

You were on Harald’s boat as they retreated. You stared out over at the water of the river, the green of the trees reflecting, fencing you in as you retreated. Magnus spoke to Harald as if his words held any weight. The more Magnus spoke, the more it felt like he was dripping poison into your brother-in-law’s ears. You didn’t trust him, and coming from someone who trusted Halfdan within knowing him for less than twenty-four hours, that was something new for you.

“I still don’t believe that you’re my brother.” You said with venom in your words. “My father was absolutely certain that you were not his. He denied having sex with your mother and my father, does not like to lie about his affairs with women.” You remembered when Björn whispered to you about their father’s affair with Queen Aslaug after they had returned home. He was never shy about it, but you were there, you spent time with Queen Kwenthrith in Mercia and you were absolutely certain he wasn’t your brother.

“Well he lied about this one.” He said hastily. You pulled your axe from the ring on your belt and held it to his throat, looking down at him. This weak, snivelling piece of shit claimed to be your brother yet he couldn’t stand his ground when you stared down at him. 

“You want to know why I don't believe him Harald?” You asked as you turned the blade of the axe against his throat, tracing the curve of his Adam’s apple on his throat. 

“Hmm? Why’s that Bragi?” You laughed although it sounded hollow even to your own ears, thinking about the night Queen Kwenthrith had placed all her attention on you, laughing drunkenly and patting your head like you were some precious thing. 

“Because his mother didn't sleep with Ragnar when we enlisted as her mercenaries. She tried to sleep with me, when I was barely seventeen.”

“That's not true!” Magnus protested, his eyes wide, afraid. “She told me Ragnar was my father and so did he.”

“When I prove that you’re lying, and I will.” You murmured to him. “I will sacrifice you to the gods and drink your fucking blood.” You stared down at him, a menacing glint in your eyes. 

“Bragi enough.” Harald called you looking amused, his eyebrows raised pointedly. “Go to Halfdan, calm down, we have much to do before returning to York. You can finish your threats later.” Harald smiled at you, almost teasingly. 

“Sorry Harald.” The man smiled at you from where he sat.

“It’s fine, now go to my brother I’m sure he misses you and he’s worried about you.” Harald had a playful tone in his voice, laughing at you. There was indignant yelp that Halfdan let out from where he as sitting at the comment. You smiled and wandered over to Halfdan, dropping to his lap and hearing hm grunt. You chuckled and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“I’ll have you know he’s just teasing. Can’t just deal with the fact that we’ve been hiding our relationship for years and he didn’t figure it out.” Halfdan stared up at you, a smile playing at the corner of his lips before they turned upwards. “You sit on me like you think you’re as light as you were seven years ago.” He teased, a soft whisper in your ear. 

“Are you saying I’ve gotten fat Halfdan.” You raised an eyebrow at him, ruffling a hand through his very minimal hair. “Hmm?”

“Now why would you ever.” He patted your stomach while laughing. You were just as broad shouldered and fit as Björn even if you were slightly shorter than him, you flexed, and Halfdan lifted up your tunic slightly. “You’re built like a god.” He rapped his knuckles against your stomach.

You laughed and pulled your tunic back down, shaking your head at him. “You know I’m not. I look more like Björn now.” You squished the smallest bit of fat on your stomach and laughed when Halfdan threw his head back with a small smile. He wrapped an arm around you and pulled you close, toying with your hair.

“But you’re not as tall, which means I can still carry you to bed and it won’t be awkward. Hmm? And you’re the better looking brother remember?” Halfdan cooed at you, smiling at the blush on your cheeks. 

You laughed back, ducking your head down so that the others on the ship didn’t see how read you turned.. “You just like carrying me because it reminds you of when we first met.” You pressed your nose to the top of his head.

“Maybe.” He admitted, tugging on your braid slightly. “I like thinking about how drunk you were, how clingy you were.”

“I was young and dumb.” You poked his chest. “And I liked you too much for only having met you for a day.”

“You liked me just the right amount.” He teased. “Blushing and looking flustered, asking me to stay the night even when you could barely walk straight.” Ah yes, your first night together, when you stumbled out of the great hall together, wanting to kiss the Halfdan’s flushed cheeks.

“Now you can’t blame me for that. You sail into Kattegat to meet your brother looking like a god. What else was I supposed to do? Not be infatuated with your smile?” You protested somewhat shyly, eyes wide. You clearly remembered the day they’d sailed into Kattegat, watching Harald geat his brother. “Hmm, you were chaos incarnate I thought. Wild and beautiful.” 

He ducked his head at that, looking away from you, suddenly shy. “You thought I looked like a god?” He asked softly.

“Could I have thought anything else? With that smug smile on your face?” You played with his fringe, tilting his head to look at you. “Besides, you teased me all night in the Great Hall, why wouldn’t I want to take you home.”

“Well now that you’ve brought it up.” Halfdan chuckled and captured your lips into a kiss, unashamedly wrapping his arms around you and tracing the seam of your lips with his tongue. “Should I tell you what I wanted to do to you that night?” He teased against your lips once he pulled away.

The men on the ship around you whooped and wolf-whistled, shaking the both of you out of the world that the both of you caught yourselves in. Your cheeks reddened further and Halfdan only laughed along with them, throwing up a rude gesture towards one of them.

 

* * *

 

Back at York, you were met with apprehension. Many of the men that were waiting, stood surrounding the gate, glaring towards Harald. You drew your axe when a man shoved Harald, grunting out something about Harald being a bad leader. Harald charmed the crowd instantly in response, using his skill with words to slightly diffuse the situation. That was until the man swung towards him again and gained a taste of Harald’s sword. You fought with him as Harald’s men began to slaughter them, Harald’s eyes glancing over the crowd with a harshness he only had when no one was listening to him.

“Friends, I didn’t have the chance to present to you. Magnus is one of the sons of Ragnar Lothbrok that have decided to join us. My brother Halfdan, and Bragi Lothbrok are also here.” Harald announced as he began to promise reward and that York was going to be the very centre of the kingdom that Harald wanted to build. You smiled at him as Halfdan wiped his axe on your sleeve, smiling at you.

Halfdan nudged your shoulder with his, before wrapping his arm around your shoulder to pull you close to him.

“We’re free now Halfdan.” You murmured. “I swear.” You cupped Halfdan’s cheek, leaning in to press your forehead to his. “He can protect us now.”

“I know, I just never thought, after all these years.” He held your hand, pulling you along after Harald as he began to push through the crowd of people. Magnus trailed behind Harald like a puppy with a new master. Halfdan rubbed a hand down your back as you glared in distaste. 

Someone showed both you and Halfdan to your own rooms, just down the hall from Harald’s own room. Halfdan eagerly pushed his way into the room, grabbing onto your waist and tugging, you close, before he lifted you, taking you by surprise. It always did. Halfdan with his lithe runner’s frame, broad shoulders and his arms, wrapping around you and lifting you with very little trouble. He walked the both of you over to the bed, pressing your body flush against his. He laid you down, kissing you senseless, laughing when he finally pulled away to take a breathe. 

“Still like picking me up don’t you?” You teased, arching your back tantalizingly against the bed, your tunic pulling up to reveal a sliver of skin across your hips. Halfdan hummed against you, shuffling down to start mouthing at any visible skin, until he dragged his teeth over the showing sliver of skin.

“Fuck.” You gasped as Halfdan bit down and teased the indents his sharp teeth left with his tongue. “Want me?” 

“Hmm, always.” Halfdan looked up at you through hooded eyes, a sultry tone in his voice. Halfdan tugged on your trousers, dragging them down your thighs, enthusiastically dragging his mouth over every inch of exposed skin. “Look at you you’re beautiful.” He rasped against your skin with an absolutely filthy grin. He licked another stripe across your hips, teasingly close to your cock. He pinned your hips down with his hands, digging his fingers into your skin, leaning in to tease your cock.

“Fuck you.” You threw casually down at him, as he lingered with light touches, barely giving you anything. 

“Hmm, I want you too.” He responded with  his tongue poking out of his louth, lazily tracing patterns across your length. 

Neither of you left your room that evening, not even tempted by the thought of missing dinner.

Later that night, you met with Harald, Halfdan dozing in his bed where you left him with a soft kiss to his forehead. He poured you a cup of ale, smiling at you. “You wanted to see me Bragi.” You scratched the back of your neck, smiling shyly at him.

“I wanted to come to you, tell you the truth. About everything with Halfdan and me over the years.” You took the cup from him, sitting down, meeting his eyes.

“The truth? What else is there to tell me? You’ve married my brother, you’ve been with him for many years, there’s not much you need to tell me. If you’re still worried that I don’t approve. You shouldn’t be, I just wished you and Halfdan came to me about it from the beginning.” He sat himself down next to you, placing the pitcher back down onto the table. 

“I suppose it started long before I met your brother. When Bjorn and I were younger, our mother left our father.” You began. You remembered the day well, Torstein urging both you and Bjorn to stay with Ragnar instead of following your mother. “They asked us to choose, Bjorn and me. Between Ragnar and Lagertha.” You pressed your tongue against the back of your teeth, wringing your hands together. “I loved my mother so much Harald, but Torstein” — 

You were young, wanted to be like the men that councilled your father. You wanted to be great, like they were. You abandoned your previous sentence. “Bjorn left. And I stayed with Ragnar. My loyalty was to Ragnar, and I stayed because his skutilsvein was the object of my affections at the time.” Harald looked surprised at the admission, watching your eyes flit down to your hands. “I watched him die, when we invaded Wessex for the first time.”

‘You were a child.” Harald interrupted, his voice low with surprise.

“Hmm. I was yes. A boy who didn’t know what any of his feelings meant.” You took a drink from the cup Harald gave you. “I didn’t understand what it all meant back then but when I first met your brother I had those same feelings for him, I genuinely liked him more than anyone I’d known, more than my father’s skutilsvein and I worried myself sick over wanting him.” You explained, taking a deep breath. “Our relationship furthered in Paris, and then in Rogaland, we had been exchanging letters for a while, in secret. We killed King Arnarson’s son because he threatened to tell you about us. Harald, Halfdan was so scared about telling you, he thought you would abandon us and hate him or hurt me.” 

You leaned forward in your chair, dropping your head, almost afraid to look at Harald. “You almost caught us so many times. In Rogaland, in the Mediterranean with Björn and my brother Hvitserk, I thought you knew when you saw how jealous I was in Algeciras. And then when we were on the boats back to Kattegat I heard you talking about potentially killing my brother.” You fiddled with your ring, lifting it up to show him. 

“I love your brother Harald, possibly more than anything in the world. But my father and my brother have been my entire life before him, I couldn’t abandon the thought that you’d use him for you own ambitions so I confronted him with an axe to his throat.” 

“You held an axe to his throat?” Harald looked surprised. “My brother’s throat?”

“Well, I confronted him in our bed, right… after he asked me to marry him.” You chuckled sheepishly. “He still married me after, woke Floki and Helga up to do it.”

“Only you Bragi, would pull an axe on someone wanting to marry you.” You shook your head at him.

“I was worried he was using me to help you further your ambitions, but you, you never knew about us so how could he.”

“I had my suspicions, I’ll admit.” Harald murmured over the top of his cup his eyes trained onto you. “You were, very close to him. But my brother has always had better luck with women, and men I suppose.” He laughed raising his cup to tap it against yours, the tension in his face softening. “I don’t suppose you couldn’t have fallen in love with me instead hmm? Given me a better reason to cut my hair?” Astrid was still a sore spot for him, in light of her betrayal, but his smile helped you relax. He leaned back in his chair and tilted his head forward, showing you the knot on the top of his head, a teasing smile playing on his lips.

You threw your head back with laughter, trying to picture doing what you did with Halfdan with Harald before shaking your head. “I don’t think I’m your type Harald. Besides, Harald, I think Halfdan might be the better looking brother, he’s more my type.”

“I heard my name?” Halfdan came up behind you, looking less tired than was when you left him in your bed, his chest was bare, hair slicked back and out of his face. He leaned down to kiss the top of your head, wrapping his arms around your shoulder. “Are you two gossiping about me? Huh?” He asked playfully, tucking his head into the crook of your shoulder before he kissed your jaw. He seemed happier now that Harald knew about the both of you and he was in both your company, more carefree.

“Just talking about why things were fated to be. Bragi’s just told me how he held an axe to your throat after you asked him to marry you.” Harald reached behind him for the jug of ale and another cup, pouring a drink for his brother. He handed Halfdan a cup, as he sat himself onto your lap, slinging an arm around your shoulder. “Now that I see you two and know what you’ve been hiding, it’s obvious.” Harald laughed. “You can’t keep your hands off each other.”

“Aha, yes. Bragi, held an axe to my throat.” He trailed his fingers over your face, over your tattoos. “Though he did have good reason. But I proved to him that I loved him. And I am possessive you know me brother. How could I keep my hands off him.” Halfdan punctuated his words by groping your arms and then chest, fingers splaying out over your chest possessively.

“You married me with Floki as our priest to prove that you loved me.” You used your free hand to ruffle his hair. “I’m glad we did that.” You turned your head to look at Harald. “We could have a proper wedding, if you wanted us?” You suggested. “So you can give Halfdan away.” Halfdan propped his chin on your head, dropping his own gaze to Harald.

“Would you want me to brother?” Harald met Halfdan’s eyes.

“I’m a simple man brother, but I want nothing more, than for my brother to give me away to the man that I love.” Halfdan sipped his drink and kissed the shaved side of your head his lips slightly damp, before he pressing the bridge of his nose against the side of your head.

“Björn, might come and join us.” You said absentmindedly after a few moments of silence. “He knew I was coming to you, and he doesn’t want to fight for the Christians. He wants revenge on Ivar.”

“Then we’ll wait for Björn to come. If he will joins us. Then we hold you a proper wedding. Bridal race and all?” You laughed at that.

“Will I have to race Björn or will you race Halfdan?”

“Maybe we’ll do both Bragi? But I look forward to racing my little brother huh? You remember who was faster Halfdan.” Harald teased him, a smile plastered on his face.

“I can’t wait to see that.” Your smiled as Halfdan rolled his shoulders back, raising an eyebrow expectantly at his brother.

“If I remember correctly brother, I’m faster than you.” Halfdan wagged a finger towards Harald and you giggled underneath him, pulling down your very eager husband into a kiss.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brotherly bonding, and it's time for war.

Björn had come to King Harald sooner than you expected, taking you by surprise. You and Halfdan were flanking Harald’s throne, standing with your arms clasped behind your back. Neither of you were expecting to see Bjorn, even with the small possibility that your brother was going to join you. You stumbled down the steps from Harald’s throne, the first to move, before you threw yourself at your brother.

Björn embraced you immediately, his arms coming up to hug your back, his fingers curled into the furred cloak you wore. You hugged him tight, pressing his forehead to yours with a hand clasped to the nape of his neck. When you finally pulled away from Björn, you let out a sigh of relief.

He looked down at you to meet your eyes, his hands still placed onto your back. “Björn, you came.” You said almost incredulously. Your brother chuckled, touching the side of your face with affection before he lifted his eyes and directed his words towards Harald, who was watching the both of you.

“I want to take Kattegat back.” You glanced over you shoulder at Harald as Björn removed his hand from your face and stepped around you, his attention now fully on Harald.

“Björn I’ve promised Harald the throne if we overthrow Ivar.” You admitted from behind him, your heart pounded in your chest as he paused and turned his head to look at you.

“I don’t want the throne.” He shot a smile at you over his shoulder. “I just want to finish what our father started. We already have lands in East Anglia, farming lands.” Your chest swelled with pride. Your mother, Björn and Ubbe had realized your father’s dream. You felt guilty that you weren’t a part of it, but you felt your father looking down at you from Valhalla.

Bjorn turned his attention back to Harald. “Now I want my home back.” You moved, taking the steps back up to Halfdan’s side as Harald stood from throne.

“And you will get it Björn Ironside.”

 

* * *

 

That morning, Björn walked you up towards Halfdan. He glanced down at you, nudging your shoulders as you nervously wrung at your hands flowers and beads in your hair. Your eyes were trained on where Halfdan stood. Halfdan stood with a white tunic and dark pants, his fringe pushed out of his eyes, a smile wide across his face as he spotted you walking towards him.

Björn let go of your hand as you reached the makeshift podium Halfdan and Harald were standing at. You smiled softly at Halfdan when he reached out towards you to take your hand. Björn moved to flank your side, as many of the warriors in York began to gather around you. Somehow Harald had managed to find a priest, from gods knows where, and they’d preformed a sacrifice, carrying a bowl of blood as they stood before you.

“And who gives this man away?” She asked you both, a smile in her eyes as she glanced between you and Halfdan.

“I do.” Björn stepped forward, giving you a smile with a clap to your shoulder. You gave him a grateful smile, nodding your head at him.

“And who gives, this man away.” She nodded towards Halfdan. Harald stepped forward, his hands clasped together, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled at Halfdan.

“I do.”

“And do you both want to be together, in the eyes of the gods, to be bound by the fetters of marriage.” She smiled at the two of you, before you turned to Halfdan.

“Always.” You murmured, pulling Halfdan’s hand to your lips.

“I do.” You heard Halfdan’s smile in his voice as he smiled at you. “I will love you now, and forever once when we’re in Valhalla.”

“The rings.” You both took them off your fingers and placed them in her hand, before she dipped them into the bowl of blood. As the gold of the rings glinted in the blood, you glanced upwards for a quick moment, watching the smile in Halfdan’s eyes grow brighter. She placed them back onto your open palms. 

Halfdan held out his hand first, his other curled into a fist around the ring. You touched his fingers gently, sliding the ring onto his finger, the blood smearing across his skin. You held your hand out towards Halfdan. He touched your palm gently, turning it up to face the sky before he slid your wring, the golden band sliding over your finger. “I love you.” He murmured, holding your hand tightly, his fingers clenched around the ring and your fingers.

”Now since this is a special circumstance, we will have, two, bridal races.” She announced. “One after the other.” She nodded towards you and Björn. “The first one, Bragi Lothbrok, and Björn Ironside.” You grinned at your brother, falling into position until the priest signalled you to run. You took of, sprinting through the dirt that covered the streets of York, your boots kicking up the dirt. You’d been in York for a while longer than Björn had, and you used it to your advantage. 

You ducked under the spears that were swung at you, sliding in the dirt before doubling back to run towards the finish line. Björn was just a hair’s breadth behind you. You could hear the thudding of his footsteps as he chased after you. Just as you crossed the finish line, Björn tackled you into the ground with a loud laugh.

“King Harald, Halfdan.” She turned to them as you were helped up by Björn, panting. The brothers took off, sprinting, Harald quickly falling behind Halfdan. It made you laugh, Halfdan had a runners build, and he was easily ducking under and hopping over the obstacles in front of him. Harald wasn’t against a bit of cheating though as they ran, sticking his foot out and tripping his brother when he turned around to run back. Halfdan grabbed his brother’s feet, yanking him to the ground, the both of them wrestling for a good long while before scrambling up to their feet.

Harald laughed as Halfdan flicked the dirt out of his hair after crossing the finish line, and embraced you, picking you up and spinning you around. You smiled down at him, hands on his shoulders, pulling him in for another kiss. “We’re married!” You crowed in delight, looking down at him with the biggest smile you thought you had ever given him on your face..

“We already were Bragi!” He laughed, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. You chuckled along with him as he put you down onto your feet. “I love you.” Halfdan smiled.

“Yes but now! Now we’ve been married, with our brothers present. We don’t have to hide Halfdan.” You were so happy, you clung to Halfdan, feeling everything in your chest sing with joy and happiness. Halfdan smiled with you, swaying side to side with you in his arms.

“I will never want anything from the gods, ever again now that I have you, and that I get to keep you.” He murmured to you, pressing his forehead to yours.

“And I, could never live without you.” You felt a hand clap on your shoulder, and you turned your head to see Björn standing behind you with a smile on his face.

“We have a feast to throw for you, do we not?” You smiled at Björn, as he and Harald lead you towards the large church that Harald was using as a hall, laughing as they patted your back and congratulated you. Many warriors came up to the two of you as well, smiling, clapping a hand on your shoulder and your arm. You smiled at them when they offered you and Halfdan their blessings. You and Halfdan were sat down at the head of the table that Harald had set out, while he and Björn flanked you on either sides, toasting to you.

The feast was great, there was so much food that they served to you all, and Björn kept the mead flowing into your cup and down your throat, as people asked you and Halfdan about your relationship. Most questions you or Halfdan easily, others left you blushing, cheeks flushed and warm as Halfdan wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you close to him, laughter bellowing, teasing you especially with how shy you got.

Harald got up to propose a toast, looking down at the two of you with happy eyes.

“If your pour mead on me again Harald I’ll slap you with more than just my braid this time.” You threatened with a smile, narrowing your eyes and poking at him good naturedly.

He chuckled at that, nodding towards you before turning out to face the crowd of warriors eating. “You all know I’ve been in sorrow, since Astrid’s death, and the death of my unborn child. But seeing my beloved brother and Bragi, who I’ve known for years, have trusted for years, together and happy. Makes my heart fill with joy once again.” He lifted his cup to the two of you. “Congratulations to the happy couple huh! Skol!”

You smiled up at him before standing and dragging him into a hug, ruffling his hair. “Here’s to my brother in law. Who’s spent the last ten years helping to build me to the man I am.” You turned to Björn , gesturing for him to stand. “And to my brother, we share the same mother and father, we’ve shared a lot of things in life. The both of you, have done so much for me.” You grabbed Björn’s shoulder too, smiling. “To both my brothers! Skol!”

Halfdan stood abruptly, shaking his drink and flicking his hair out of his face. “Don’t you leave me out of this. To Harald, who’s looked after me since I was born, you’re the best brother I could have asked for. And Björn, for letting me see the world.” He clapped your shoulder, Harald’s and Björn’s.

“And to the love of my life,” He focused his attention on you, eyes soft as he held out his arms. “For enrapturing me from the moment we met and I spent a whole night teasing you until you were drunk, and I had to carry you home.” He stepped closer to you, as Björn and Harald stepped back slightly. “And all the times we had to hide, when we truly, loved each other. Not even the gods could tear us apart.”  He wrapped his arms around your waist and leaned in to brush his lips against yours. “Come to bed with me,” He whispered. “Husband.” He sounded so soft and gentle, his eyes fluttering shut as he met your lips with his.

The others around you cheered, wooing at the both of you, smirking and some yelling at the both of you to get a room. Halfdan pulled away from you, eyes dark as he swiped his tongue over his bottom lip, before grabbing your hand and practically dragging you out the hall. Leaving the cheering men behind you.

That night, your wedding night, officially, was the best night of your life with Halfdan. It was hair pulling and brutal fucking, rough and dirty. Bites and scratches and marks etched into skin, and sudden, desperate orgasms, you and Halfdan dragging nails and using teeth until you both were bleeding and aching and then it was slow and deliberate, gasps and moans and admissions of love and promises, where he soothed your aches and you kissed all the scars on his body. When you left your bed the next morning, too lazy to bother with a shirt or re-braiding your hair, instead gathering it into a knot at the top of your head. Halfdan following behind you, you heard people whispering and cheering at how wrecked you and Halfdan’s chests and backs looked.

You and Halfdan joined Björn and Harald for breakfast, your brother looking at your chest, wide eyed at how badly you were scratched up, bruises from Halfdan’s grip and bites. Harald kept his eyes mostly averted, until curiosity got the better of him and he peeked over at the shapes and lines you practically carved into Halfdan’s chest with your nails and teeth.

“Did you spend the night with a bear brother?” Harald asked before stuffing his mouth with food, an eyebrow raised at him. Halfdan looked up from his first bite, lifting his arms and flexing, showing off your marks.

“No but, I have a very, passionate husband.” He laughed, as you slapped the back of his head playfully. He leaned over to you, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Don’t you want them to know how good you are to me?” He teased. You shoved him off his chair, laughing loudly when he hit the ground grunting. He propped himself up on his elbows, smirking at you, with the same smirk he gave you last night.

You rolled your eyes, getting to your feet and holding out your hand to him, with a raised eyebrow. “Not gonna tease me again are ya?” You asked him. He gripped your hand and tugged you harshly to the ground and onto him, laughing freely. You heard Björn mutter to Halfdan something quiet before both your brothers skirted their way around the table and piled onto the both of you, pinning you both to the ground.

“What are you two doing?” Halfdan grunted from the bottom of the pile, trying to wiggle out of the four-man bundle on the floor.

“We’re joining in on the fun brother.” Halfdan said from on top of you. You laughed and pressed your forehead to Halfdan’s straining slightly under Harald and Björn‘s combined weight.

“Did you two get fat?” You asked in a huff, grunting as you planted your arms onto the floor and pushed yourself up, trying to tip the two of them off. Your brother and Harald laughed, a deep bellied laugh as they pressed themselves against the two of you. “Also I think we’re crushing Halfdan.” You commented as you heard your husband breathing heavily beneath you.

Harald and Björn rolled off of the two of you, and you flopped onto Björn, giving Halfdan a break. Your brother grunted as you knocked your elbow into his side, laughing when Halfdan crawled into a chair, chest heaving slightly. “All of you are fat!” He huffed as he grabbed a cup and drowned his beard in his drink.

“I take offense to that, dear husband!” You pointed at him, dramatically clutching at your chest, threatening to poke a bruise you left on his body. “That’s not what you were saying last night.” You hauled yourself to his feet and scrambled over to sit in his lap, kissing him.

“Were they always like this and we just missed it?” You heard Harald ask Björn.

“Pretty much.” Halfdan tipped his head back to smile at his brother when you pulled away from him to chuckle. “Floki told us you both were too thick to notice the marks we left on each other. He was mostly right it seems.” Halfdan laughed.

“First of all, I don’t spend all my time staring at you, or Bragi, brother.” Halfdan said in defense with a smile. “Second of all, you never did any grand gestures around me.”

“Hey, I only found out because you both were too loud in the main tent.” Björn  accused. “You actively hid it from me.”

“We hid from everyone Björn, and you can’t complain. You got to join in.” You poked your tongue out at your brother. The statement caused Harald’s head to snap towards Björn, eyes wide.

“I’m sorry. He what?” He looked between the three of you. “When was this?”

“In the Mediterranean. When Björn caught us. He asked us if he could watch.” Halfdan explained as you reached over to the table and passed him a piece of bread for him to eat. “So we showed him, and just watching turned into, more than watching.” Halfdan bit into the piece of bread nonchalantly.

“So Bragi shared you with…?” Harald looked entirely too curious for it to be innocent. “With Björn?”

“More like I shared Bragi.” Björn sat back down opposite the both of you. Harald leaned against the edge of the table looking slightly overwhelmed. Halfdan curiously met his brothers eyes, gesturing for him to sit. Harald sat with his hands clasped in front of him, his chin propped up on his knuckles.

“You and Björn?” You went red as Halfdan gave him a lewd grin.

“They looked very good together.”

You felt your cheeks heat and a smile threatened to slip onto your face. “He doesn’t need to know any more details!” You declared. “No more talking.” You clamped your hand over Halfdan’s face, shaking your head at him.

“I’ll admit, I’m curious.” Halfdan licked your hand and you pulled it away, before wiping his spit from your hand onto his chest. He laughed when his brother looked sheepish at the admission.

“We could always show you brother, like we showed Björn.” Halfdan offered. You rolled your eyes at that.

“Halfdan we’re not going to fuck in front of everyone who gets curious. You stop that.” You bumped your shoulder against his chest.

“We could, then I can show how good you are to me.” He teased, patting your chest. You sighed, with bright red cheeks, the flush spreading all the way down your neck, before burying your face into Halfdan’s hair.

“I hate you so much.” You mumbled playfully into his hair. “If. If Harald is interested. We can show him something.” You gave in. “But only showing.”

“Don’t worry brother, Bragi won’t leave you for me, I already asked.” Harald said with a laugh. “I’m not his type.”

“You certainly aren’t Harald.” You teased him.  “Your brother is the one for me.”

After your banter with Harald that morning, Björn and Harald took to instructing the men and women in York to prepared to take Ivar. You knew since your renounced your throne to Harald, Björn would have to make a deal with Harald since he was now the rightful heir, technically our of all your brothers, he and Hvitserk were the only two able to challenge Ivar for the throne of Kattegat now.

You and Halfdan took to sparring in the streets of York, training, sharpening your skills. You found it easier to fight against him now that you had fought with him for so long, you knew how he stepped, how he turned, and how he moved, but it was the same for him too. He could pary almost every one of your strikes, braced for every move you made with your shield to try and knock him off balance. 

By the end of it, the both of you were sweaty and covered in dirt and rolling on the ground wrestling because it took too long for either of you to yield to each other and he decided to tackle you. You laughed at him, when he made a triumphant noise, finally pinning you to the ground before raising his arms in the air.

“Victory! Is mine!” He crowed down at you. You laughed, only needing to lift and tilt your hips to throw him off of you. Despite being older than you Halfdan was lithe and shorter and with your bulk, you could easily dismount him from where he sat on top of you. You smiled as he scrambled to his feet, brushing off his shirt like you didn’t just flip him off of you. “That, was rude.” He poked his finger at you. You rolled onto your side and pushed yourself to your feet, grinning at him.

“You can’t blame me for practically being Björn’s twin.” You laughed, gesturing to yourself. “Besides, you like me like this.”  He laughed at you, pulling you down by your shirt to meet his lips.

“I do, I do very much like you like this.” He trailed a hand underneath your shirt, splaying his fingers across your stomach, smiling smugly up at you like you weren’t already sweaty and riled up from wrestling in the dirt.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish Halfdan.” You flirted as you walked him backwards until you cornered him against the brick, looking down at him with bright eyes.

“I never do.” He pulled you in for another kiss, smirking against you as he teased his hand back up, underneath your shirt and then down to the waistband of your pants, tucking his fingers under them and teasing at your hips. You dipped your own hands under his shirt to grab at his waist, pulling his hips against yours and then using yours to pin his against the wall, slowly rolling them against him, hearing his breath stutter slightly. Just as you slipped your tongue into his mouth you heard a cough beside you, someone clearing their throat. You turned your head to bark at whoever it was, only to see Björn watching the both of you with his hands clasped in front of him. The blush on your cheeks must have been bright red, as he chuckled and shook his head.

“Harald asked me to come find you both, discussions for Kattegat and what we plan on doing.” He raised an eyebrow, eyes dropping to Halfdan’s hands that were still slowly sneaking into your pants. He stopped and pulled them back up to the small of your back, smiling innocently at Björn from around your shoulder. “Well, are you two coming?”

You inhaled sharply, staring down at Halfdan, who was smirking at you with the cutest smirk you’d ever seen on his face, you leaned in close to him, murmuring to him in your native tongue, promising him that you’d continue this later. You slid a possessive arm around Halfdan’s waist, still slightly riled up from his teasing as Björn walked the both of you over to where Harald was sitting, lounging in his throne with a horn of mead. Harald looked amused to see the both of you, red cheeked and your arm tight around Halfdan.

“Bragi, brother.” He raised his horn. “I want to propose an idea to the two of you, if you both are willing” You glanced over to Halfdan, and then Björn, cocking your head to the side.

“What kind of idea?” Halfdan said from beside you.

“Well you know that Björn and I have come to an arrangement, that I am to be King of Kattegat, as his heir, and I will marry Grunhilde if she does not protest.” Harald took a sip, eyeing both your reactions. “I would like the two of you to take over my rule, should I die in battle without children after becoming King.” He sat up in his throne. “Bragi I know you said you wanted to live a life with my brother, a happy life. The two of you ruling wouldn’t allow for that, but unless I have sons or daughters that are old enough to carry the burden of ruling, there’s no one else, no other people I would trust to rule.” He stood from his throne, and stepped down towards the both of you, before reaching out and placing a hand on your shoulder. He looked to you, and then to Halfdan. “There’s no one I could trust more.”

“If, you do not have any children, or if they aren’t old enough, Bragi and I, we could run things until they were, keep things in check for you. If not, we would pass it on to Björn’s children, our nephews when they are old enough.” Halfdan seemed to think exactly what you were thinking, his eyes and jaw were set, but the smile on his face was soft. “But it won’t go beyond protecting family, protecting our family, and we won’t rule forever.”

“I agree with Halfdan. You know how I feel about family Harald. You  _ know. _ ” You pulled Halfdan closer to your side.

“I know very well how you feel, and I understand. I have, learned a lot from you Bragi.” You chuckled at that, ducking your head. “I’ll accept your conditions, brother.” He gave Halfdan almost a knowing grin.

“Now you two, go back to what you were doing, away from public eyes.” Björn teased the both of you, shooing you both away with his hands in front of him. “You’re going to spoil people by putting on shows. Go to a bed.”

“They’re lovebirds, what did you expect Björn.” Harald bellowed out a laugh. “Besides they get to be open for the first time in a long time. Let them show off.”

You pulled Halfdan into a deep, almost dirty kiss in front of Björn, as a slight protest, with a smirk on your lips and mischief twinkling in your eyes. You teased the seam of his lips with your tongue, feeling him wrap his arms around your shoulders, melting into your hold.

“Alright, enough!” Björn made to both of you chuckle against each other, and you both parted to look at him.

“They’re both petty, I’d expect some bricks in your bed tonight.” Harald stepped over to Björn and patted his shoulder. “Best we get used to it, eh brother?” You laughed when Björn looked just a teeny bit uncomfortable at the idea of Harald calling him brother.

“Maybe we’ll just stick with names? Don’t say that again Harald it was weird.” You chuckled. Harald shooed you away from him with a grin on his face, one that helped you relax. It reminded you of your time with Rogaland and the freedom you felt to be around Harald and Halfdan without any major responsibilities. Halfdan seemed to guess what you were thinking, as he reached around to rub his hand on the small of your back with a soft smile.

He then decided to man handle you, turning you away from Harald and walking you out. Outside, he wasn’t shy in pressing himself to your side, trying to distract you as the both of you were stopped by a few new additions, returning hunting parties, scouts who wanted to survey Alfred’s army to see if they going to push the stronghold. You gave them all polite smiles, nodding, exchanging pleasantries before directly sending to Harald with their news.

When you finally reached the house you and Halfdan had staked a claim to, after Harald complained that the two of you were too loud for your room down the hall, you pushed you inside before closing the door behind him. You placed your axe on the table you kept near your bed, eyes hovering over a map you left spread open, fingers trailing over the ink, before you turned your attention back to Halfdan. 

Halfdan, who had come up behind you, who was staring up at you with dark eyes and his lips slightly parted, slightly pink from your earlier attentions. He gave you that cute smirk again, tucking his hands under your tunic and sliding them against your sides, splaying his fingers on your skin. You reeled him in by his tunic, swooping down to catch him in another kiss. He laughed against you and walked you both backwards until you both tumbled into bed with boyish smiles and murmurs of love on your tongues.

 

* * *

 

You found Björn later, with questions on the tip of your tongue, about your mother and your brother. You were worried about Ubbe and Torvi, and your nephews as well. Björn was sitting in a chair in the corner of Harald’s hall with a cup in his hands, sweating from training the men in Harald’s army. You crept up on him before tapping on his shoulder, snatching his cup from his hand and taking a sip as he lifted his head to look at you.

“You menace.” Bjorn laughed up at you, snatching his cup back. 

“Hello big brother.’ You smiled at him, dropping into a chair next to him. 

Björn crossed his arms over his chest, sipping at his drink. “Bragi, how is it that you’ve managed to drag yourself from Halfdan’s side?” Your brother teased you. Sure you’ve been stuck to Halfdan’s side, but he couldn’t really blame you, you’d spent the last eleven years hiding the relationship you had with him.

“Hush you. I can leave him alone for five minutes without needing him.” You poked out your tongue at your brother, teasing him. “I wanted to talk to my big brother about something.” You crossed your legs and met his eyes. 

“Alright. What is it then?” Björn asked, his eyes going wide like they usually did when you asked him something.

“How’s our family. I didn’t get to say goodbye when Halfdan and I left.” You regretted not going to say goodbye to Ubbe, Torvi and your mother before you left, and especially your nephews. You leaned forward, dropping your elbow onto the table Björn’s face dropped. He frowned, leaning forward to cross his arms and place them onto the table. When Björn didn’t say anything you felt the floor drop out from under you.

“Björn what is it?” You searched your brothers face, eyes scanning his frame.

“Mother is gone.” He barely met your eyes as he said it, his fingers curling against his forearms.

“W-what… What do you mean?” Your heart made its way up your throat. Björn lifted his eyes to meet yours, staring at you.

“After the battle, we couldn’t find her body, she disappeared, she wasn’t among the living nor the dead.” You felt your fingers begin to tremble against the table. A burning sensation set itself behind your eyes and a rushing noise filled your ears. Björn scooted back his chair, coming around to wrap his arm around you and he pressed an affectionate kiss to the side of your head. 

You gasped, taking in a harsh breath. Björn hugged you, curling his large frame around you as a sob crept it’s way up your throat. You barely had your mother in your life in the first place. She left after you had just turned twelve. You barely saw her while living with your father because you felt a duty to your younger brothers and your father. You barely saw her since you went to avenge your father. The sob that crept up on you tore out of your throat.

Regret washed through you. You remembered when she and Björn left, crying for days and resenting your father in the years to come. The same feelling flooded you now, regret, shame, this time you were the one that left her.

“I’m sorry.” You gasped as Björn held onto you. “I shouldn’t’ve left.” You clutched onto Björn’s arm, pressing your chek against his bicep. “I should’ve stayed with you, we could’ve found her together.” Björn was always closer to her than you were, but she was still your mother, you  _ loved her _ .

“There wasn’t anything you could’ve done.” Björn whispered into your hair, pressing another gentle kiss to your braids. “She was at her end, perhaps she escaped. I don’t know, but I promise you that you are not to blame.” He soothed a hand over your shoulder.

“I was barely with her Björn, you left with her and I stayed behind with father, I was her son!” Björn shushed you, lifting your head up to stare at you. 

“Hmm and she never hated you for it Bragi. She understood. We both did And if she is alive, we will find her.” He promised you, wrapping you up in a hug again. “I promise little brother.” 

You clung onto Björn, letting his words chase themselves in your head. You will find her. You both would, that’s what family was for.

Halfdan and Harald found the two of you hours later, you with red-rimmed eyes and dried tear tracks down your face, and Björn with his arm around you, holding you close to his side, no tears down his face but he had a sour look and glared at anyone who looked at the both of you wrong. The both of you were leaning against the wall of the hall, sitting on the floor with a pitcher of ale between the both of you.

“Bragi?” Halfdan’s voice was soft as he rushed over and knelt by your side, taking your face in his hands. “What’s wrong my love?” He leaned in close and searched your eyes.

You tried to smile, lifting your eyes to meet his. “Just, Björn told me something important.” You reached out for Halfdan and hugged him close. Ever since Björn had told you, you’d been worrying yourself about the moment you had a battle that Halfdan didn’t come back from. Your breathed in his scent, burying your nose into the crook of his neck. “I love you.” You whispered.

Halfdan made a small noise before pulling away and looking down at your face, scanning your expression. “I love you too.” He said firmly. He helped you to your feet as Björn also stood, turning his attention to Harald as they started their own quiet conversation. You stood there with him, holding his hands and pressing your forehead to his in a small moment of silence.

“Halfdan.” Harald said after a while. “Why don’t you and BRagi get some rest hmm? It’s been a big day today, a lot of training and work has been done. We have made progress.” He smiled, his expression calm. 

You smiled gratefully towards him, holding Halfdan’s hand tightly as he clutched onto you and pulled you away, out of the hall. You glanced back towards Björn and Harald who were watching the two of you go, before Halfdan distracted you with a small nudge of your shoulder. 

“Bragi?” He spoke, finally, after he’d pulled the two of you into your house. “Can you tell me what’s wrong?” 

You took a deep breath, still holding onto his hands. “Björn told me that our mother is gone. Missing. They couldn’t find her after the battle.” You lifted your eyes. “Part of me thinks that if I stayed, maybe Björn and I could’ve found her.

Halfdan cupped your cheek, stroking his hands over the tattoos on your skin. “Bragi no. It’s not your fault.” 

“But if.” 

“Stop.” He interrupted you, fingers gripping onto your cheek. “None of that can be blamed onto you, you’ve been doing everything for your family all your life. You stayed loyal to your mother, to Björn. You have your whole life.” 

“I chose to stay with my father Halfdan.” Your hands were shaking against his. 

“Stop that. None of that would’ve done anything to hurt her, you loved her, you fought with her, by her side.” Halfdan stroked your cheek gently.

“I’m sorry Halfdan I just...” 

“Hmmm I know love.” Halfdan soothed.

Halfdan sat you down onto your bed, sitting down next to you and taking your hand in his. He leaned in and kissed your cheek, across the teartracks left down your face. He pressed his nose against the slight stubble of your sideburns before kissing your cheek again. 

“Tell me about her.” He said softly, rubbing his fingers over the back of your hand. “Your mother, what was she like when you were a child.” 

You smiled, mostly to yourself as you thought about your mother, how strong and brave she was. How she had stood up for herself against her father and refused to be pushed around. She was Lagertha, shield-maiden. She was strong, fierce, everything Björn turned out to be. 

“She was strong. Not just with her fighting skill, but her passion, her strength and her spirit. She was strong, fiery almost, with who she was and her faith in the gods.” You began, thinking about you and your siblings as children. “Björn trained mostly with our father, and our mother, she took to training Gyda, our sister, you know, being the only girl with two brothers, my mother wanted her to be strong, stronger than both of us. She was devastated when Gyda was taken by a fever.” 

Halfdan looked surprised when you mentioned Gyda, most people were, no one knew you had a sister because Ragnar had refused to talk about her, no one was willing to ask Björn, and your other siblings never knew her. “Honestly, I was closer with Floki and the rest of my fathers friends, Arne.” You flinched as you thought of One-Eye and how he died, how upset your father was when he told you. 

“Leif, Torstein,” The thought of Torstein made you smile to yourself, how dumb you were, having feelings for someone at that age. “Our uncle Rollo. They all had a hand in training me. But my mother, she taught me one important lesson that I valued above everything else, above the training, the life skills she gave us, how to cook and care for each other and ourselves.” You fiddled with your ring around your finger. 

“She didn’t let me forget that I was worth more than our father’s name. I was to become my own man, not just son to the Earl Ragnar” You chuckled to yourself, dropping your eyes to your hands. “I was more than just Bragi Lothbrok, second son of Ragnar. I was Bragi, just Bragi, the gods namesake.” 

Floki chose your name, a secret your mother told you in the middle of the night as you couldn’t sleep. Floki had come to your mother while she was standing at the fence, placed a hand on her stomach and whispered the name. You let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. A tear tracked down your cheek.

“Now I am Bragi Lothbrok, husband to Halfdan Halfdansson.” You teased albeit a little wetly, leaning in as Halfdan put his arm around you. “And I’m happy with that, I just wished that I did more to show that I loved her.” You leaned in to press a chaste kiss to his lips.

“Your mother has a good son. You are a good son.” He murmured against your lips. “And I’m glad she had you, otherwise I would’ve never have met you.” You smiled against Halfdan’s lips and hugged him, pulling him back down towards the bed. He wrapped his arms around you, fingers grazing over the tattoos on your face.

“Remember what you said to me about these?” He asked softly. “When you came to Rogaland?” 

“Hmm. Yes.” You wondered what it had to do with your mother. He touched your braids gently, lifting them into your view. 

“Did you ever realize that despite having the same haircut as your father. Your braids were exactly the same as hers.” You sat up at that, pulling the hair-tie out of your hair and letting the braids fall and the beads in them click against your back. You ran a hair through them, pulling them over your shoulders to look at them.

“But you did them.” You raised an eyebrow. Halfdan always did your braids unless you had to do them yourself.

“Because you asked me to.” Halfdan said softly. “You asked me to do them this way. Ever since Rogaland, you’ve been doing things to honour your mother without even realizing it. You’ve stayed with Björn. You did everything you could to protect Kattegat when she needed you and and your brother.” He brushed his hand through your braids.

“You’re more like her than you think Bragi. You just need to see that.” Halfdan leaned in again to kiss the corner of your mouth. “You need to see yourself like the rest of us see you.” 

 

* * *

 

Björn and Grunnhild’s wedding was, not something you were happy about. You didn’t know this woman, nor did you trust her and with all of Björn’s past experience with relationships it seemed like a sign that something was to go wrong. You and Halfdan flanked Harald’s throne, as he sat and stared at them, as your brother kissed her. As the celebrations kept on, you and Halfdan kept away from the ale, watching the people, you wanted to keep an eye on Magnus and the venom and his words. You smiled, as you watched Björn walk with Harald, talking to him. You felt Halfdan slipped his hand into yours as you stood. After Björn was done talking to Harald, Harald slipped over to the both of you, carrying to cups of ale in his hands.

“Bragi, Brother. You aren’t drinking.” You laughed, glancing around at the celebrations.

“I don’t mean to offend Harald, but I don’t want to drink.” You spotted Magnus’ curly hair among the crowd. “I still don’t trust Magnus’ words, not one bit, and I would rather be sober when he tries to kill me, not drunk off my arse and unable to hold an axe.” You squeezed Halfdan’s hand gently.

“I don’t know why you’re still looking out for his betrayal.” Harald lifted one of the cups to his mouth, handing the other over to his brother.

“Because there’s no way my father slept with her. I was there.” You frowned. “I don’t trust his word, he is not part of my family Harald. He has never been, and he never will be. I will never accept him as a brother.” You pulled Halfdan closer to your side, as Harald finished his cup. You smiled at him, and stepped down from next to his throne, Halfdan walking next to you and pushing through the crowd.

 

#

 

Like every journey you’d ever made with with Halfdan, it was storming and the gods had willed it to rain. The winter seas swelled and crashed against the sides of the ship, towering over you with the heights of castles and crashing into the boats. By the time the boats had even made it to the shore, the rain had lightened but it was still a heavy drizzle across the skies as you waded through the water, carrying small barrels of your supplies through to shore.

“Do you know where we are.” You heard Harald call out ot the both of you.

“I recognize those mountains over there. I think Kattegat is just beyond shadow.” Björn answered from shore. He pointed towards them as he turned towards to Harald. “We can attack Kattegat by crossing the mountain ranges and attacking from there.” 

“Yes but it’s still my army!” You rolled your eyes as you reached the shore, overlooking the pebbles and the sight of your brother and Harald facing each other. “And I will lead, my army.” 

“Have your plans changed? Do you not wish to attack Kattegat?” Björn asked over the rain. Sometimes Harald and Björn were entirely dumber than they had the right to be. You huffed, shooting a glance over to Halfdan where he stood knee deep in water, carrying a barrel. He shook his head in response and rolled his eyes, his fringe sticking to his face.

“I may still wish to attack Kattegat, or I may choose to make a deal with Ivar.” Harald stalked over to your brother, his usual smug expression plastered onto his face.

“I know that they say that you are protected by the gods, that you are indestructible but I don’t think so. I think that you bleed like any other man.” Before you could interfere with the fight, jumping in between them, you saw Gunnhild throwing herself into the fray between them and slapping your brother across the side of the face and chastising the both of them for fighting when you hadn’t even marched on Kattegat yet. Maybe she wasn’t going to be so bad afterall.

You marched with Halfdan, Harald and Björn until you came across another army, bearing black and red banners. Björn and you offered to go forward, while Harald and Halfdan stayed behind. As you brought closer, you recognized those banners as King Olaf’s, and as you were led over to a tent, behind Björn you heard whispers, names. When you ducked into the tent you spotted Hvitserk sitting at a desk. You smiled, as Hvitserk stood. Though you were never close, you were glad that Ivar hadn’t killed another brother of yours.

“Now it’s a surprise to find you marching with King Olaf. Are you marching to join Ivar?” Björn asked as you leaned back on one of the barrels your arms crossed in front of your chest.

“No, I’m marching against Ivar, with King Olaf’s army.” He frowned. “Our scouts mentioned that you were here with an army? Where did it come from?” 

“We’ve asked King Harald to join with us. Halfdan and Bragi made a deal with him.” Björn explained after he set Hvitserk down from a hug. 

“Halfdan? I thought Harald killed him.” Hvitserk’s brow furrowed. 

“Like I would let him kill Halfdan.” You chimed in, pushing off from the barrel to walk forward. “I would never.” You tucked your fingers under your armpits. 

“So you and Halfdan.” That brought a laugh to Björn and your faces. 

“We’re together yes. We’ve been together for a long time, yes. And yes we are married. Is that all the questions you have Hvitserk?” Your little brother laughed and slung his arm around your shoulders and Björn. “Fate has brought us all together.” 

“I spent a lot of time wondering why I jumped ship and left Ubbe, why did I stay so close to Ivar. But then I realized that it was fate. That it’s my fate to kill Ivar.” Hvitserk mused against the two of you. “Bring your army, come and join us, we will take Kattegat together.” 

  
  


* * *

 

In the morning, the army started to move from your little brother’s camp. THere was an itch under your skin that you couldn’t scratch. Your collective army had increased in number, but there was a slight power struggle between Harald and Björn, and King Olaf and Hvitserk. You still had to march through the trees to get to Kattegat, but you were closer than you were before when you’d arrived.

“We can never negotiate with Ivar, the consequences the first time were too great,” Your eyes slid over Halfdan. He looked frightened to be back there again, There’s no ambition in his eyes like there is in Harald’s, no determination like Bjorn, no resignation to his fate like Hvitserk’s. Halfdan was anything but those things concerned, fearful, worried, you couldn’t name all the emotions that flitted through his eyes as you sat next to him warming your hands. Your hand finds his, fingers curling into each other before you turned away.

Harald’s ambition around the campfire was wildly dull when they exchanged stories about Ragnarok. He sat far away from them, while they spoke. You sat close to Halfdan, an arm wrapped around him until Harald came up behind the both of you to place a hand on each of your shoulders. Harald’s voice was void of emotion, not even having the excitement of retaking Kattegat. You knew that that night carried the same weight as the night before you and Halfdan fought your brothers.

You clutched Halfdan close to you, cradled him for the entire night, took care of each other kindly and carefully.

The next morning was tense. Halfdan dipped two fingers in paint and drew them across your cheeks, painting the same symbol that was adorning your brothers and Harald’s faces. When you looked over to Bjorn, the determination in his eyes and the hard set of his jaw were what readied you ultimately. You gripped the wood next to Bjorn, grunting when it slammed into the gates, You called out with him, at the top of your lungs as you continued to push the battering ram against the gates. 

You know Kattegat like the back of your hand. Bjorn gestured to you, calling out to you to try and breach the wall. You joined the other men as Halfdan continued to help Bjorn with the ram. You dragged yourself up one of the ladders with a shield above your head. Slashing away at the archers with your axe. You heard the cheers when the gates pushed open and Grunhilde climbed up next to you, helping disrupt the archers. 

The children that were a part of Ivar’s guard stared at you in fear, afraid as their eyes went cold. You barely made it through the number of Ivar’s men until you were shoved into the ground, slamming into the dirt on your back, the breath knocked out of your lungs. Most of your brother’s men, Bjorn’s men, your men and Harald’s men had retreated by the time you’d crawled to your feet and managed to get away.

Halfdan found you, limping as you entered the camp, you were a part of the last stragglers coming back into camp. You had your arm around your chest, hugging your possibly bruised ribs. He clutched your side and held you up by your shoulders, being your rock. He put you down next to Harald, before you hugged your brother-in-law as his lips were stained with blood with an arm around his shoulder.

“Harald.” Your voice softened as you cradled his cheek, wiping the blood from the corner of his mouth. “Harald you’re safe.” You look around at your siblings, even at Grunhilde and King Olaf. “You’re all safe.” Halfdan took to tending to your rips, stripping you out of your armour and tunic, pressing a salve over the dark bruising while Björn argued with King Olaf about the possibility of a second attack.

“Bjorn, Bragi and I are sons of Ragnar Lothbrok, we don’t give in.” Björn’s voice interrupted the soft whispers Halfdan was giving you. You shifted, ready to stand up and get in between whoever Björn sounded like they were going to stab, only to be pushed back down by Halfdan.

“That’s all fine and well. Ivar is a son of Ragnar Lothbrok.” King Olaf replied pointedly. It made your blood boil. Ivar wasn’t your brother, it didn’t matter that he was by blood. He wasn’t family, not after Sigurd, not after disowning Ubbe. Not after  _ trying to kill your mother. _

“Ivar is not, his son, he never belongs with us.” Your voice was harsh to your own ears, painful, a curse.  “He lost that right when he murdered Sigurd, when he disowned Ubbe despite all of us caring for him,  _ when he tried to kill our mother. _ ” You gestured between you and Björn. “Why is he the only one allowed to get his revenge? Huh?” You raised your voice, pushing yourself up, this time ignoring Halfdan’s warnings.

“He killed my baby brother in cold fucking blood.” Sigurd, who everyone teased was your son instead of your brother. Sigurd who sat in your lap calmly and listened to you tell stories. Sigurd who you introduced to Halfdan as your favourite brother. Sigurd who you trained with, who you  _ trained _ . Your blood boiled, burned so hot. “He deserves to die and I don’t care if he is a son of Ragnar I will fucking make sure of it.” You almost yelled, breathing harshly, your ribs aching. 

Your brothers, Grunhilde, King Olaf, Harald and Halfdan looked at you in surprise, not having seen you lost your temper before. Halfdan’s mouth had dropped open, and even Björn was looking like he didn’t recognize you.

“Sigurd.” Harald’s voice broke through the haze of red that covered your eyes. “He was the one that sat in your lap. The morning after you drank with us.” He said slowly. Your bottom lip trembled and you sat back down, looking at the blood on your hands from the battle. “Bragi.” Harald’s hand dropped onto your shoulder.

“You remembered that?” You raised your eyes to look at Harald with wet eyes.

“How could I not.” He smiled at you, it was soft and gentle, as was the hand on your shoulder. “You looked so happy, introducing him to us before he ran off.” You choked back a wet gasp, reaching out to pat Harald’s knee.

“When was this?” Björn looked over curiously at you.

“After the night. “You waved your hand between Harald and Halfdan. “THey were deasting with us, the next morning we were having breakfast.” Your eyes stopped on Hvitserk. “He and Sigurd were spying on us from on top of their toybox and they fell over. You ran off to go find Ubbe after.” You chuckled wetly as you told Hvitserk. “But Sigurd, he sat on my lap and let me introduce him to Harald and Halfdan.”

“Didn’t you call him your favourite brother?” Halfdan piped up from beside you. Björn looke affronted at first, before he broke out into a smile. 

“Now you know how I felt about you.” He smiled and walked over to ruffle your hair. “Huh little brother.”

“I thought you hated us?” Hvitserk spoke up with a soft voice. “You were always so hard on us while you trained us. Especially when Björn wasn’t there.”

“You idiot.” You chuckled fondly. “I loved all of you, I love all of you. I just wanted you all to be ready, if you could fight and beat me, fight and beat Björn then I’d know that you were ready to be on your own.” You sniffled and rubbed at your nose. “That we wouldn’t have to be there to take care of you once you got older.”

Hvitserk looked surprised at the admission, like he wasn’t entirely expecting you to care about any other them other than Björn.

“He got mad once.” Harald chimed in. “Because I implied it was a hardship to look after and love you and your brothers because you did not share the same mother.” You shot a glance over at Harald. You remembered that too. “He gave me a good tongue lashing over it. First time I felt proud of him.” Harald looked at you fondly.

“So when you were making sure we could fight.” Hvitserk met your eyes. 

“I was making you’d survive. All of you.” You choked back another sob.

“Bragi I’m sorry.” Hvitserk got up and moved over to sit by you, Halfdan moving out of the way to let your brother lean his head against your shoulder. Harald shifted out of the way as well, as Björn came to sit at your other side. “I’m sorry.” He said again, softer.

“I’m sorry too Hvitserk.” You should’ve let them known more that you loved them. “I should’ve reminded you how much being brothers meant. It was hard, There’s eleven years between Ubbe and I, even more between me and you. You and him were as thick as thieves, running around, I could never talked to you.” You smiled fondly. “Only listening to each other and no one else. But Sigurd. He listened to me.” You shook your head. “If I had reminded the four of you more often, maybe he’d still be here.”

Hvitserk dropped a hand onto your forearm, gripping onto the armring that matched the one on his own wrist. “It wasn’t your fault Ivar killed him. That’s Ivar’s fault.” He rubbed your forearm, leaning against you. You wrapped an arm around your little brother and hugged him close. 

“We’re brothers.” You mourned. “Brothers and we’ve torn each other apart.” Bjorn rested his arm on your leg and leaned against you as well. 

As you lifted your head, you saw Halfdan and Harald speaking wordlessley to each other, before the both of them got up and hobbled over to a different tent, sitting down next to each other and start talking.

 

* * *

 

 

Halfdan refused to leave your side. He was always touching you, even as you approached the treeline for Freydis to let all of you into Kattegat. His hands were gentle, warm on your skin. True to her word, Freydis had let you into Kattegat, and with you, Bjorn, Harald and Hvitserk, you stormed into Kattegat with ease using the secret tunnels, your eyes fierce but the roar in your chest fiercer. 

It moved almost like a pattern as you approached the Great Hall, Bjorn yelling towards the men and women who were beginning to gather in the street. First Bjorn struck the first man protecting Ivar outside the great hall, then you, then Hvitserk, and then Harald and Halfdan followed with just as much fierceness and hatred as you did. 

Your eyes blazed when you met Ivar’s. All you could see was Sigurd’s blood on your hands, Sigurd’s eyes staring up at you while he lay motionless and bleeding out next to where Ivar sat. All you could see was your baby brother dead and you couldn’t protect him. Ivar had barely looked fazed by the sight of you and your brothers standing in front of him.

What you didn’t expect during the fight, after Ivar disappeared into the great hall, was to see Harald fall to his knees with a hand to his chest. You barely managed to duck a swing of one of his men’s swords before you fell to your knees next to him, holding onto his chest. Halfdan was by your side, clutching onto his brother just as tight as you did.

Hvitserk and Bjorn went on ahead of you, going into the Great Hall after Ivar while you and Halfdan pulled Harald to his feet. Harald gasped, clutching onto the both of you, his arms around your shoulders. Halfdan glanced over at you, giving you a once over for injuries. As much as you wanted to follow your brothers in, Harald’s wheezing was worrying you. You brought him over to the steps of one of the houses holding onto his side.

“I’ll tend to him, go to your brothers, then need you.” He met your eyes, nodding when you raised an eyebrow. “Go.” Harald urged next to you.

You gave them both smiles and stood, ready to storm into the great hall, except your brothers walked out without Ivar between them, looking bewildered. 

“What, what is it?” You asked, hefting your axe in your hand. 

“Ivar wasn’t there. Freydis was dead.” Ivar killed her. He must have. You sighed, sliding the handle of your ace through the ring on your belt. Björn and Hvitserk’s attention was dragged away from you, at a point over your shoulder behind you. You turned.  What you didn’t expect to see after turning around was Ubbe, walking up to all of you with a shy smile on his face, looking like he didn’t expect to welcomed. Behind him, your mother was watching all of you, her hair cut all the way to her shoulders. You gasped, fingers clenching and unclenching at your side.

Ubbe walked up to you all first. You couldn’t help yourself. You launched yourself at your little brother, pulling him into a hug and dragged him close, squeezing your arms around his shoulders.

“Bragi?” He hugged you back, his voice filled with surprise. 

“You’re alive.” You pulled away to look at his face. He looked unharmed, uninjured. A tattoo ran down across his eyes, similar to the scar that was across Björn’s. 

“I am.” He ran a hand across your arm before he focused on Hvitserk behind you. He moved, pushing past you towards Hvitserk as you faced your mother. She smiled at you, gentle as she stepped forward. You wanted to reach out to her, but as she held the sword of Kings in her hands, you let Björn go to her first. 

“All Hail King Björn.” Your mother cried out. Your brother had raised the sword above his head. For a moment, you thought you could see hints of your father, standing where Björn was. It shook you to see the image of him layered over Björn’s. 

You turned away from the scene and returned to Harald’s side, as Halfdan had begun to heat a blade to cauterize the wound on his side. “Do you need me to get you anything?” You asked, your hands hovering over Harald’s shoulders.

“Bark of ash, garlic, sage, the usual things to make a poultice.” Halfdan listed, watching the blade heat in the small fire.

“I should have all of those things.” You should, in your home if it wasn’t ransacked by Ivar. Although you’re not sure if Ivar knew where you even lived in Kattegat since you were so busy trying to look after your brothers you practically slept in the great hall. Halfdan nodded at you, and you took off running through the streets.

Your house was untouched, your things and Halfdan’s things still strewn about the place. Your things were still scattered, your cupboards and shelving still organized. Your rifled through your things, picking out the ingredients you needed as well as other things that you thought would’ve been of use.

You sent a small prayer towards the gods, and thanking Floki for teaching you all these things as a child. With all of it gathered into your arms along with a few bowls clutched between your fingers, you ran back towards Halfdan and Harald, passing over whatever Halfdan needed. 

As the blade hissed against Harald’s skin, the first beginnings of weight was beginning to lift off of your shoulders.


End file.
